Life of a Lily
by LyssLovesTiva33
Summary: Mary and Matthew were certain they were destined to be the opposite of Cora and Robert, have three beautiful boys to raise. But when Lily Crawley is welcomed into the world, she is the light of their life and takes Downton Abbey by storm. But how much of this storm can the family bear before they succumb to it?
1. Chapter 1

Life of a Lily

Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey, I simply watched it, fell in love with it, and decided to do what I always do with tv shows I love… write fanfiction about it!

Synopsis: Mary and Matthew were certain they were destined to be the opposite of Cora and Robert, have three beautiful boys to raise. But when Lily Crawley is welcomed into the world, she is the light of their life and takes Downton Abbey by storm. But how much of this storm can the family bear before they succumb to it?

In which Matthew DOES NOT DIE! And it will be structured with the first half of the story (however many chapters it ends up being, I do not know) being Lily growing up, interacting with the family and the staff and the second half will be the plotline I have come up for Lily, Mary, and Matthew. In addition, for the sake of giving Edith a suitor who is proper (and not married), she truly married Sir Anthony Strallen and was not jilted at the altar.

This chapter is more of an introduction to the family, etc… If it's kind of boring I am sorry. I will post the next chapter as soon as I can!

_A/N: I have noticed many people have read the first chapter but not gone on to read the rest of them, please do not let the style of this chapter determine your view on the rest of the story, this is more a synopsis of everything and almost a prologue, try chapter 2 and 3 before you make any decisions please (:_

* * *

When Mary found out she was pregnant with her first child, she had been relieved. The operation had been a success, her husband and she were perfectly fertile, and they were well on their way to making a family.

"We've done our duty," was the words that came out of her mouth as she welcomed her son into the world. Matthew, having still been up North when she went into labor, absolutely delighted. His parting words still lingered in the air, the taste of his lips on hers, when her father came in much later than she expected.

Not bothering to comment on his tardiness, still holding the baby to her chest, she looked up at him fondly.

"Meet your grandson Papa," she beamed. Robert smiled weakly, sitting down on the bed.

"Mary, I pray, put the baby down for a moment," he whispered.

"Are you not happy Papa?" Mary looked taken back. "It's a boy… what is the matter?" Now that the baby was safely in his crib Robert opened his mouth.

"There's been an accident," he told her strongly, taking her hand in his. Immediately she snatched it back.

"But he was just _here_," she hissed, knowing it was about Matthew or her papa would not have asked her to put the baby down. "Is he alright, I must go to him!"

"Mary, you must rest. Dr. Clarkson is with him now, I'm afraid, it didn't sound good," Robert's throat tightened as he looked at the baby in the crib; being woken up a second later by the sob that escaped Mary's mouth.

"Hush my darling," she croaked, her own tears spilling down her face. Her mind reeling, she looked down at her perfect son, already so much like his father. Though he had her hair, the rest of him was Matthew. People tried to console her the rest of the day but she would not let him go, not stop looking at him, until she was allowed to see Matthew. She had to make up for the time she was about to miss with him.

Once she was allowed to see her husband, she didn't leave his side except to feed the baby. When he was conscious, he was groggy. The baby was not named until about a week after he was born.

William Thomas Crawley was Mary's life. With Matthew fully recovered she poured her heart and soul out for the boy. Her Mama and Papa found it miraculous, how little she relied on the nanny during the next few months. The nanny did the baby's laundry, she changed him most of the time, bathed him most of the time, but there was seldom a night when she would rise to calm the crying baby that Mary, Matthew, or both of them would fly into the room to soothe their son.

As a surprise for Matthew, when Mary discovered she was pregnant again around Christmas of 1922, she did not tell him until Christmas Day. During luncheon when they exchanged presents with the rest of her family, she handed him only an envelope. Inside it read:

_Lady Mary and Mr. Matthew Crawley will be proud to welcome another son or daughter into their lives June of 1923._

Uncharacteristically, he swept her up in his arms and kissed her in front of the whole family. The letter dropped to the floor, Mary snatched William from her father, and they continued blissfully as just the three of them until Isobel picked up the note and let out a delighted shriek.

Robert Matthew Crawley was born traditionally, Mary lying in her bed, Matthew pacing downstairs, Cora and Isobel by Mary's side, Violet sitting down, asking Carson for more tea.

Matthew had wished for a little girl but his Bertie, as they immediately began to call him, was perfect.

"We've got two beautiful boys," Matthew whispered as he sat on the edge of her bed, cradling Robert as she rocked William to sleep. "One more, don't you think."

"A little girl," Mary smiled proudly.

"A little girl," he nodded.

Mary was pregnant again by 1924, any thoughts of infertility banished from their minds, they had no trouble getting pregnant.

The family was in the nursery; Tom had taken Sybbie to Liverpool to visit his brother so it was just the four of them. They had a night time routine, Mary would sit in the rocking chair Bertie on her chest, William curled against her side. Matthew would read them a bed time story in his chair beside them before they put them to bed.

"Soon we will be doing this with a baby girl," Matthew said wishfully in Mary's ear. Mary smiled softly at him.

"We do not know if it is a girl Matthew," she reminded him, rubbing her stomach.

"I can dream, can I not?"

"You want a baby sister my darling," Mary affectionately asked William who knuckled his eyes in exhaustion.

"Where?" the two year old, almost three year old questioned.

"In Mama's belly," Mary told him and the boy, his bright blue eyes suddenly wide, gasped and kissed his Mama's belly with a giggle.

"Ister!"

A few days later, the boy toddled into his Mama's bedroom having escaped from his nanny, and looked up at her. She lay in bed, her face pale, her eyes glazed over. Anna, his mother's lady's maid held a damp cloth to her head. No one noticed he was there.

"Mama," he cried. The ghost of a smile on her face scared him as she asked Anna to lift him on the bed for her. "Mama," he reached up to cup her cheek as he saw his Papa do so often. "Sad? Baby Ister?"

"My darling boy," Mary croaked. "You are not getting a baby sister, not yet anyway. I am so sorry." She asked Anna to bring Bertie to them as well while William laid his head on his Mama's chest. He was just like her husband who knew when and what to say and do, but even her living boys could not help her getting over the loss of another child.

"Mary," Matthew whispered softly hours later, walking into their room, not shocked to see the boys in there and fast asleep. She was not asleep, she had been crying. "My darling." He reached out a hand to brush her hair from her face.

"Matthew don't," she hissed. "You-you'll wake them up… and I will cry again."

"I love you so much," Matthew informed her.

"I know," Mary whimpered. "But-"

"This was not your fault, we can try again," he reassured. "For now it will be just us and the boys."

"Dr. Clarkson told me he thinks it best that we do not try and get pregnant for year, to let my body recover and-" she choked back a sob and Matthew climbed in bed, despite still being dressed, and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Then we will wait a year my darling, we will get another child," he sighed. Mary closed her eyes and for a moment Matthew thought she had fallen asleep.

"It was a boy you know… I believe we may be destined to have all boys."

Mary kept her spirits up for the boys in the days and weeks to come. Matthew was loving, her family supportive. Everyone reassuring her that she is bound to get a girl at some point. It sounded so strange to hear everyone wanting a girl for them, especially The Dowager, but it was only because they had already done their duty two times over. Edith, who Mary tried so hard to be civil with, was even careful not the rub her twins, a boy named Theodore Anthony Strallen and a girl Elizabeth Josephine Strallen in her face.

After a year of waiting and a year of trying, nothing happened. It seemed as though her blossoming, beautiful five year old and four year old, who acted so much like their father, were to be their only children.

The previous night had been Bertie's birthday party; she was so thankful for having a nanny to wrestle them out of their outfits Cora had bought for them and get them ready to be rocked. Occasionally Mary would do this, but she was so exhausted. The nanny said she was taking the boys and six year old Sybil on a picnic outside on the grounds tomorrow and would be happy if they would join them.

Instead, Mary was sick a majority of the morning the minute she woke up. Despite her protests, Matthew sat behind her and held her hair back. He had Anna get her tea and insisted they call for the doctor.

"I'm not pregnant Matthew," she whispered. "We've gotten our hopes up before."

"Perhaps this time we will not be let down," he quipped but immediately had to return to helping his wife back to the bathroom.

They were late for the picnic, having not been dressed until it was rather late. They were shocked to see Cora had joined them and Isobel was telephoned as well.

"Mary my darling, you do not look well," Cora fretted.

"Perhaps we move to the shade," Isobel suggested.

"Mama," Bertie called. Mary ignored them and sat by her youngest son. "Mama, Baby!" This had shocked everyone, including Mary.

"No Bertie," Mary murmured. "Mama is not having a baby."

"Baby!" he said again and Matthew again insisted they have Dr. Clarkson come over. Mary refused. In fact, it took about two weeks of constantly getting sick in the morning and feeling tired, that had Mary convinced she needed to see him.

"Dr. Clarkson, is anything the matter?" Matthew asked as he suddenly met him coming down the stairs, having just come home from work.

"The opposite Mr. Crawley, I suggest you go to your wife," Clarkson hid his smile well as Matthew hurried upstairs into their room, but she was not there. He found her in the nursery, sitting on the floor playing with Bertie while Sybil and William played in the corner.

"You know my darling boy," Mary said softly. "You were right about Mama, Mama has a baby."

"Baby," Bertie giggled. "Mama." Bertie looked up. "Papa!" Mary gasped and whipped her head around to the door.

"Mary," he whispered hoarsely and she smiled at him, kissing Bertie on the head before rising to meet him.

"You were right," she sighed.

"I know how much it pains you to admit that," Matthew joked.

"Oh Matthew," she rolled her eyes and reached up to stroke his cheek with her thumb. "You know I love you so much. We are having another baby."

"We are," he smiled and leaned in to kiss her. They were interrupted by Sybil and William exclaiming, 'EW!'

"Ya know," Tom said from the door. "When Sybbie starts kissing boys, it's you two I'm blaming." And they all laughed, Tom having found out immediately that Mary was pregnant the second Bertie opened his mouth. But they didn't care.

* * *

I know this chapter is all over the place and you haven't even met Lily yet (or you might assume that you technically have, and you'd be right) but I wanted to provide a quick background to their family dynamic. They live at Downton, the boys have a nanny but Mary and Matthew (Matthew because he desperately wants to do things differently and Mary because she is a rather good mother) have a more proactive role in the children's life. They do not let the nanny do everything, they let them do just about everything but eat in the dining room because I doubt Robert, Cora, or Violet would ever allow that. And soon they are adding a girl in the mix.

Please let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Life of a Lily Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey!

I had already written chapter 2 completely different but decided to add it a chapter before it because I wanted to write the dynamic of Mary and Matthew with her pregnancy and continuing to raise two boys.

This is just odd moments of Mary's pregnancy, cute moments with Matthew, cute moments with the children, just a bunch of fluff to take away from the sorrow I'm sure we will all have come the start of season 4 (especially after seeing the promo pic of Mary and the baby for about the twentieth time!)

* * *

Mary heard the familiar clink of the Anna placing her tea tray on the nightstand and felt the sun on her face, but she was downright exhausted, pregnancy was particularly exhausting when you have two children under the age of five who love attention from their Mama.

"Morning my darling," Matthew smiled and laughed as Mary groaned and rolled over, her arm draping across his chest and her face nuzzling further down into the covers. "Or not." She heard an echoed chuckle from her lady's maid who took her reluctance to wake as a dismissal for the time being.

"I'm pregnant Matthew," Mary sighed. "I am perfectly content with sleeping all day."

"I'm not sure your mother would approve, or me for that matter," Matthew smirked and pressed a kiss into her hair. "And our sons would most certainly not." He pressed another kiss behind her ear.

"They could join me," Mary quipped.

"If they start thinking they can come in here every day," Matthew whispered, "How could I ever do this?" Having not even opened her eyes yet Matthew flipped her over and got on top of her. Kissing her lips, face, and neck ravishingly. Content Mary moaned and unconsciously wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. His hands wandered to her breasts before falling lower. Suddenly he snatched his hand away as it landed on her stomach.

"What is it Matthew," Mary tentatively opened her eyes, his kisses having revived her. "What's the matter?" She met his gaze and noticed a foolish grin on his face. "What?" she snapped. Without a word Matthew guided her hand with his to her stomach. Mary's eyes widened as she felt a swell there that had not been there the night before.

"That is what is the matter, or rather, what is amazing," he tried to kiss her again but Mary pushed him off. Sitting up.

"But I've only just stopped getting sick in the mornings," she gasped. "With William and Bertie, I hardly showed for months!"

"Maybe our baby was just anxious to be known," Matthew pushed her gently back to lay down. He gazed at her lovingly.

"Don't look at me like that," Mary hissed. "Because this is only the beginning you know? A slippery slope."

"How can I not look at you like that? When you look so gorgeous," he was wearing that goofy grin again and it was infuriating to Mary.

"I am not gorgeous Matthew, I'm fat," she groaned.

"You are growing our baby in there," he kissed her cheek, his hands running down her sides until they rested on her hips. He shifted down, pulling her nightgown up to expose the tiny baby bump that now resided there. Gently he pressed a kiss there, then two, then three.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I'm letting our baby know about much I love him or her," Matthew replied. Between kisses he rhythmically stroked the bump. "Papa loves you so very much. Never doubt it for a second."

"That's enough," Mary pulled his head up. "Papa will wonder where you are, and we mustn't keep our boys waiting. They expect to see their Mama after breakfast and at this rate they won't."

"We can't let our little princes down, can we?" Matthew chuckled.

"No we cannot or we would never hear the end of it," Mary laughed. "I wonder where they get that from?" She arched her eyebrow towards Matthew.

"I have no idea what you are talking about," he chastely kissed her on the cheek, untangled himself from her, and got out of bed.

"Of course my darling," Mary rolled her eyes. "Your mother has asked us over for tea today, shall we expect you or-"

"Tom and I wanted to have a look at the cottages today, but if we are finished by luncheon certainly I will join you," Matthew said going to his door. "Enjoy your morning with the boys, I shall see you later." Mary drank her tea and rang Anna for breakfast and to get dressed. Her good mood in the morning was ruined as she struggled to fit her tightly skirt over the baby bump.

"Milady whatever is the matter?" Anna asked as Mary practically gave up and sat on her chair with a bump, crying softly into her hands.

"I'm terribly fat," she cried.

"You are not milady, you are pregnant," Anna reassured her.

"No Anna, yesterday I was slight, I could have fit into this," Mary continued. "And now it will not fit."

"There are plenty of other skirts we can try milady," Anna put a hand on her shoulder. "It will be quite alright."

"I don't even know why I am crying," Mary cried.

"You are pregnant," Anna said, rubbing her shoulders comfortingly. "You've told me enough times before that it is not your fault, now it is my turn to remind you of that."

"Oh Anna what would I ever do without you," she sniffed and Anna handed her a handkerchief to wipe away her tears.

The day was further complicated as she went to the nursery to find that the cold Sybbie had was transferred to Bertie and the four year old was unusually fussy and already desperate for his Mama to comfort him.

"I do not believe he should go outside today," Mrs. Jensen said. "Or if so he should not walk."

"If he is still up for visiting Isobel we shall take the pram, he won't take kindly to it but I will carry him if I must," Mary told the older woman.

"You won't be carrying him Lady Mary if Mr. Matthew has anything to say about it," the older woman quipped and Mary sighed.

"So you've noticed my condition," Mary mumbled. "I suspect many more will in the coming days and I will be known as the fat Lady."

Mary was thankful Bertie was too tired to want to walk and settled for being pushed in the pram instead of being carried, because _she_ wanted to carry her baby boy, and Mrs. Jensen was right, Matthew would never allow it.

"It is such a wonderful day, isn't it?" Matthew asked as the family of four walked into the village, Matthew's hand secure around William's.

"It is a shame Bertie has a cold, we could have allowed them to play in the garden but I'm afraid I won't feel comfortable with that," Mary shook her head.

"Maybe we can all sit outside," Matthew suggested.

"Oh Matthew Bertie will not sit if he is outside," Mary chuckled.

"Perhaps we will have one calm child," Matthew reached out to place his hand on her bump. Mary swatted it away playfully.

"William is as calm as you are going to get Matthew," Mary's eyes sparkled.

"I wonder where they get it from?" Matthew joked.

"You I'm sure," she said sheepishly.

"Mama, Papa, let's go faster," William tugged on Matthew's arm. "I want to go faster. I want to see Gran Iz!"

"Your Mama must take it easy my boy," Matthew told him. "We must go at this pace."

"Why?" William asked. He peered around his father to his mother, his eyes full of worry. She was glaring at Matthew but looked softly at her oldest son. Both Matthew and William shared the same expression of worry.

"Do not listen to Papa my darling, your Mama is perfectly well," Mary said pointedly.

"She just must take care of herself because she is carrying your baby sibling," Matthew told him.

"Baby?" Bertie chirped from the pram.

"I'm still your Mama, I'll just look different for a while," Mary reassured.

"Fat, Mama get fat?" Bertie added and Mary froze, inhaling sharply.

"Robert Matthew Crawley apologize this instant," Matthew hissed. "It is not nice to call your Mama fat when she is not." He looked up at Mary who was sobbing into her hands. "Mary darling."

"It's the hormones," she wailed too loud and too improper in public but Mary couldn't help it. She was at least thankful her husband was not like her father when it came to speaking logistics, perhaps because he was a doctor's son. "But it's true."

"You are gorgeous," he told her. His hands wandered to her stomach. "The fact that you are pregnant makes you equally as beautiful as you ever were, maybe even more." Mary swatted his hands away as Bertie started to cry.

"I'm sorry Mama," he wailed. Mary went around to the front of the pram; though tears were still leaking out of her eyes she took her baby boy's hands.

"I'm not upset at you darling," she murmured. "Mama's just being silly."

"You are not fat Mama," he protested, still crying. Mary wiped at his eyes, though still looking around and thankful that not many of the villagers who were walking around were paying much attention to them.

"Oh but I am my darling, would you like to feel Mama's belly?" Mary laughed through her tears. "It's where your baby brother or sister is."

"YES!" he giggled and reached out his little hands.

"He or she is too little to kick, but some day she will kick and you can feel it too," Mary smiled as he looked up at her in amazement.

"May I feel too Mama," William piped up.

"Of course," Mary ruffled his hair. "Now we better continue or Gran Isobel will wonder where we are." Matthew grabbed William's hand again but held out his arm for Mary. She managed to push the pram with one hand, her other entangling with Matthew.

"You handled that better than I expected," Matthew quipped and Mary scoffed.

"I blame you," as she overheard Bertie babbling about her belly and his baby brother or sister.

"For what?"

"For being you."

"And why is that bad," Matthew chuckled as William ran ahead, seeing Isobel exit the house to greet them. Mary stopped and turned to him.

"Your sons are as obsessed with my stomach as you are."

* * *

"Are you sure you are comfortable," Matthew whispered, leaning over his wife.

"Matthew," Mary moaned. "I'm six months pregnant, honestly, I'm not invalid. I would tell you if I was not uncomfortable."

"If you are sure," Matthew mumbled. Mary made a growling sound in the back of her throat as her fingers fumbled with the buttons on his night shirt.

"I'm sure," she hissed. "Now stop talking and kiss me before I get cross." Matthew smiled widely and leaned over to kiss her hard on the lips, Mary sighing against his mouth. Matthew's hand caressed her shoulder and slid the top of her nightgown down her arm. "Oh Matthew."

"I love you darling," Matthew breathed and allowed his stomach to touch her protruding one, though his arms and legs braced him so that none of his weight was on her.

"I-" Mary murmured, her eyes having fluttered closed, snapped open as she felt Matthew jump back. "What is it darling?"

"The baby," he whispered.

"You felt that," Mary gasped, her hand flying to her stomach. "I thought- you couldn't feel that yesterday." She reached out her other hand to hold his but couldn't find it in the dim light.

"Has he or she been moving the whole time?" Matthew gasped, Mary was confused, he sounded distressed and horrified.

"Matthew the baby always moves at night," Mary winced sitting up.

"Does it know what we are doing?" he moved further away from her. "Does it know what we were about to do?" Mary let out a cry of frustration.

"Honestly Matthew, not this again," Mary clenched her fists around the bedding under her hand. "When the baby is born, he or she will be a newborn, which might be the most obvious thing I have ever said."

"But will it know what we were doing?" he repeated.

"Damnit Matthew," Mary hissed, despite her protruding stomach she stood up. "A newborn cannot talk, let alone walk, hold its head up, anything except cry, eat, and go to the bathroom. Do you think it will know if we are having _sex_?" Matthew winced at her tone. "What is different now Matthew, because we had _sex_ plenty of times during my pregnancy with Bertie and William."

"But they never kicked me," he whispered.

"Baby's kick, it's what they do," Mary wrapped her dressing gown around her.

"Where are you going?" he protested weakly.

"The only explanation I can see for you stopping is that you did not want to make love with me," she said pointedly. "And if you do not want to make love with me, I'd prefer not to be in the same room as you right now."

"But Mary-" he reached out and arm but she stalked towards the door and walked out. Matthew jumped out of bed, his fingers attempting to rebutton his shirt quickly, slipped on his dressing robe and slippers, before following her out. "Mary," he hissed. She was nowhere in the hallway as he peeked his head out. For a pregnant woman she moved rather fast.

Despite not seeing her, he knew exactly where she would be.

"Mary," he ran his fingers through his hair as he saw the nursery door creaked open. He was thankful for their nanny being a fairly heavy sleeper as he spied Mary in the corner of the room, sitting in the rocking chair. In the far corner sat an unused bed, recently abandoned by Sybbie as she was old enough to move out of the nursery. Adjacent to the bed sat two beds side by side where his sons slept peacefully, their blond hair identical as it stuck out in odd ways as his often did in the mornings. Closer to Mrs. Jensen and the door sat the crib, dragged back out from the attic to accommodate their newest addition to the seemingly ever-growing nursery.

She didn't look up as he entered but he knew she heard him.

"Mary please come back to bed, you do not want to disturb the boys," he sighed.

"You should have thought about that when you refused to make love with your ugly fat wife," Mary shot back at him quietly.

"Mary," Matthew gulped, walking to the rocking chair and bending down beside it. Her arms were folded against her chest so he practically at to pry her fingers away in order to hold her hand. "I'm sorry, it just shocked me. You are not ugly and you are not fat. I could not think of anything more breathtaking than my pregnant wife. You are carrying my third and most likely last child, I just… I don't want anything to happen to either or you, I want to be careful. And careful means I do not want to emotionally scar our child before he or she ever comes into the world." Mary opened her mouth but pursed her lips as she heard Bertie shift. His little legs kicked out and pushed the covers off his body. Without a word she stood up and pulled Matthew out of the room, but not before pausing at Bertie's bed to readjust his covers.

"And," Mary said quietly. "It was this point in my pregnancy when I miscarried."

"I suppose so," Matthew muttered, his thumb moving over hand.

"Matthew nothing is going to happen," Mary said softly. "And nothing will happen. Whether we make love or are as careful as can be. OH-"

"What?" Matthew gasped, terrified.

"That was a big one," Mary smiled softly, her hands still in his, placing both of them over her stomach. The two of the waited in silence until their baby kicked again.

"Oh Mary," Matthew tucked her hair behind her ear. Mary smirked and untwined her hands from his.

"You had your chance Matthew," she teased, getting back into bed, more towards the middle. Matthew groaned at his foolishness but climbed back in next to her. Mary placed her head on his chest, her arms wrapped around him. She felt Matthew's hands run softly down her back, settling on her hip, his fingertips barely touching her stomach.

"I'm a fool then," Matthew mumbled, pressing a kiss to her hair.

"But I love you anyway," Matthew nuzzled her nose into his shirt, sighing and closing her eyes. He thought he would be used to his wife's mood swings, but he was always scared he would cause irreparable damage one day, but as his wife's breathing deepened and she murmured contently he highly doubted it.

The last thing Matthew felt as he lost his battle with consciousness was a soft kick beneath his hand.

* * *

"Good afternoon," Mary heard a voice in her ear and her head snapped up from the book she was reading.

"There you are," Mary smiled. "I was beginning to believe Papa would have you tied up all day." Matthew placed a chaste kiss on her cheek and sat down next to her on the bench outside.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Decided to enjoy one of my last days outside," Mary said wistfully. "With the weather turning and moving into the last months, I won't be able to be outside for months after the baby is born."

"Do you mind if I join you?" Matthew asked.

"Well you are already sitting down," she arched her eyebrow a leaned her head on his shoulder, holding her book back up. Matthew tipped his head back to look at the slightly cloudy sky and chuckled as he heard the faint giggle of his boys behind him. "It looks like my quiet day is no longer." Matthew turned around and saw Mrs. Jensen ushering the boys towards the garden.

"Mama, Papa!" Bertie trilled.

"Hello my darling boy," Mary sighed. "What are you doing today?"

"Mrs. Jensen said William and I can play outside in the garden today before it gets too cold," Bertie played with the bottom of her dress.

"Yes because you can't play outside in the cold unless you are bundled up really tight," Mary reached forward and tried to button his coat a little more but Matthew pushed her back gently before bending in front of his son and doing it instead.

"Brrr," Bertie giggled.

"Bertie come on!" William hissed. "Let's go!"

"Go on son," Matthew chuckled.

"Bye Mama, bye Papa," Bertie called as he ran towards his brother and nanny. Mary waved to William and nodded at Mrs. Jensen before turning back to Matthew who covered her mouth with his own.

"Matthew," she gasped, pushing him away. "We are outside."

"Alone," he whispered, his hands on her stomach.

"So let's do something constructive," she hissed.

"Like what?" Matthew said arching his own eyebrow is a fair imitation of Mary's famous look.

"Like… names," Mary smiled.

"Girl or boy?"

"Both," she murmured, leaning her head on his again.

"Catherine?" he questioned. "Georgina?"

"No and no," Mary laughed. "Be serious Matthew, William, Robert, and Georgina?"

"What is your brilliant idea then?" Matthew shot back playfully.

"I don't know, I must have time to think about it," Mary tapped her finger.

"So you berate me for my choice of names and you do not even have any ideas," Matthew chuckled, holding her hand gently. "That's not fair is it?"

"It is if I say it is," Mary smirked. Matthew looked at her incredulously. "Fine… what about we think of middle names for a girl, that will be easier."

"A family name?" he questioned.

"Granny would appreciate it if we named a girl after her," Mary said. "After all, she championed for us from the beginning."

"Something Violet Crawley," Matthew laughed.

"That is good enough for now," Mary shrugged. "A boy?"

"Well it needs to go with William and Robert, or rather William and Bertie because we never call him by his true Christian name," he reminded her.

"I was thinking-" she began. "I don't know."

"Mary you can't let me suggest Georgina off the top of my mind and not tell me this, something you have clearly thought about deeply," he teased.

"I can if I want to," she arched her eyebrow. "Fine," Mary sighed. "I was thinking Reginald Crawley, after your father." She looked at him seriously and he returned her gaze.

"Really," he mumbled.

"Bertie is named after my father, it is only right if we have another son to name him-" she was cut off with Matthew grabbing her face and crashing his lips down on hers. They broke apart for a moment. "I take it you like the idea."

"I love it… and I love you," Matthew smiled and leaned in again to kiss her a lot more gently now. Despite being outside, Mary allowed it, because they were pregnant, happy, and on their way to having a complete family.

* * *

As mentioned before, this chapter was not planned; I just wanted to show a little more of Matthew and Mary's relationship with each other, their parenting, etc.

Let me know what you think, I promise you will meet Lily Crawley soon enough (:


	3. Chapter 3

Life of a Lily Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I am not Julian Fellowes but I admire him so for creating these wonderful character who I do not own!

Thank you all who have reviewed, favorited, and followed so far; this is my first try at Downton Abbey fanfiction and I am struggling a little with the character dynamics, etc. That is why I wrote the last chapter, I simply wanted to experiment and then it turned out I liked what I wrote. This chapter picks up in the action... signifcantly ;)

I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

"Mary, you should take it easy," Robert warned around the dinner table as they discussed what their plans were for tomorrow. She rolled her eyes as quickly everyone, especially her husband, chimed in.

"May I remind you all that William came a month early and he was perfectly well," Mary sighed.

"Yes but it does not mean I want all my children to be born early," Matthew quipped.

"You won't," Mary sniffed. "Bertie was not!"

"Perhaps we should not go out tomorrow," Isobel fretted. "I know I promised you both I would take you into Ripon and buy you a-"

"Mother and I can go," Matthew added.

"You will do no such thing," Mary huffed.

"It's snowing Mary dear," Cora informed her.

"Really Mama, I had no idea… I'll be fine to ride in the car to Ripon and back and then I promise I will not leave this house until the baby is born," she insisted.

"If you insist," Isobel said.

"I do," Mary put an end on the subject.

"Shall we go through," Cora suggested and Matthew immediately stood and rushed to his wife's side. She was so large she could no longer get up herself. Once the men joined them, Matthew suggested they go to bed early, so they could rest for the journey, no matter how short it really was.

"Are you sure," he said as he sat on the edge of the bed and kicked his slippers off.

"Really Matthew not again," Mary rolled her eyes. "You realize Bertie and William have started to treat me as fragile because that is how you treat me. You're sons are completely you."

"Well, I hope we have a daughter that is completely you," he murmured, leaning back on his pillow, his hand finding its way to her stomach. Mary trapped his hand there and turned to him seriously.

"And if it's a boy," Mary said.

"She'll be very insulted you called her a boy," Matthew joked.

"Matthew," she hissed.

"I'll love him just as much as I love Bertie and William," he vowed. "But I have a feeling it's a girl."

"_You_ have a feeling," Mary said incredulously. "I believe it is _I_ who has to carry him around and I _feel_ like it's a boy."

"I love you," Matthew smiled and kissed her on the cheek. Mary stopped him and brought his face closer to hers.

"I deserve a better kiss than that," she whispered and leaned forward so she could kiss him lightly on the lips.

"You do," he smirked.

"MAMA!" they heard a wail come from the hallway. It was Bertie. "PAPA!" Mary rustled in bed as if she could go get him.

"I'll get him, you stay here," Matthew reassured.

"Pretty soon, that will be a wailing baby," Mary said wistfully.

"It shall," he responded as he got up and walked out of the room, returning minutes later with a whimpering Bertie.

"Darling, did you have a nightmare," Mary whispered as Matthew placed him near her. Her four year old nodded and snuggled closer to her. "Mama's got you." With her baby boy in bed with her, Mary was thankful for a full night of sleep despite baby kicking her all night. Whatever she got was more than she was sure to get in the future.

Despite everyone's protests, after breakfast and spending a few short hours with the boys, Matthew and Mary headed to Crawley House to pick up Isobel. She insisted on letting her buy some things they were sure to need for the baby so the trio went off to Ripon. They ate luncheon out and spent a majority of the afternoon in shops, Mary resting on a bench every once in a while, until the snow suddenly began to fall harder.

"Mother," Matthew warned as he eyed the sky and Isobel was insisting they go into one more store. "I believe it's wise that we go home now."

"Spoil sport," Mary chided as they went outside to where their chauffeur was parked. Even Mary was surprised at how much snow was beginning to pour from the skies and suddenly felt uneasy. Matthew helped her into the car and they set off. The drive to Ripon was not a terribly far one, but the driver was forced to drive at a slow pace because of the accumulating snow.

"After this," Matthew muttered. "You're not leaving your bed."

"Am I under your orders then," Mary sighed.

"Yes," he insisted as he noticed she put her hand on her stomach. That second, the car suddenly began to slip. Mary gasped and cried out in pain, but it was drowned out by the screech of the car. Matthew immediately pushed Mary back gently and he used his body as a shield, bracing for impact. Isobel, who was in the front seat, immediately turned around.

"Are you okay back there," she called as the driver managed to gain control of the car and stop.

"Yes I believe so," Matthew said. "Darling are you all right?" Mary nodded unreassuringly but Matthew was too concerned about getting into an accident, his own accident hovering in his mind, to notice.

"Milady," he said. "Mr. Crawley. I'm afraid we might have to ride out the storm here."

"Good god man are you mad!" Matthew snapped.

"Matthew, he's right, do not snap," Isobel warned. "The conditions are too dangerous."

"My wife is pregnant," Matthew said.

"Your wife's not just pregnant Matthew," Mary whispered harshly, clutching her stomach, batting his hand out of the way. "She's in labor."

* * *

"Are you excited to have a baby brother or sister," Cora asked Bertie as she sat down on the nursery floor beside her grandson.

"Sister Grandmama," Bertie insisted. "Papa said."

"Brother," William added from across the room. "I want another brother!"

"What's wrong with the one you already have?" Cora laughed.

"Bertie's stupid," William huffed.

"AM NOT!"

"ARE TOO!"

"AM NOT!"

"Boys settle down please," Cora smirked at her grandsons. "Would you like to join Grandmama in the drawing room for tea, you may not be allowed to drink it yet, but you could give me company."

"YES!" Bertie giggled, holding his arms out for his Grandmama to pick him up.

"What about me Grandmama," Sybbie asked sweetly.

"Of course my darling," Cora smiled as she lifted Bertie into her arms and led them down the stairs to the drawing room. She rang for tea for herself and sat down in a chair, Bertie was babbling about his little sister again while Sybbie and William continued with their game. She only wished the weather was better and she could have Theo and Lizzie with her as well. She admits, being Countess of Grantham, she had ushered her girls off to nannies and governesses more than being their mother, but she was happy to have a chance to spend with her grandchildren. All of the joy, none of the responsibility despite the fact that three of them lived under her roof.

"Where's nanny and Miss Emily?" Tom asked as he saw his mother-in-law with his daughter as he and Robert made their way from the library to the drawing room a short while later, they heard the laughter and playing of the children.

"Doing the children's wash I suspect, she left once she knew I had them, and Miss Emily had the day off, Sybbie was in the nursery anyway," Cora explained. "When are Matthew and Mary expected back?"

"Probably just in time to change," Robert commented. Cora looked up at the nearest clock and eyed her grandchildren. It was almost time for them to have dinner and Bertie was beginning to rub his eyes sleepily.

"Isn't that right about now?" Cora questioned. "The children are getting tired."

"I am not tired Grandmama," Bertie mumbled. "Where Mama and Papa?" Cora began to get anxious as she decided to look outside the window.

"Robert however are they going to drive through that!" she exclaimed.

"I'd have stopped if I was driving," Tom muttered quietly, trying not to bring attention to the fact that he used to be their chauffeur. Worriedly, Cora rang the bell to get one of the servants to answer their questions. Albert arrived several moments later.

"Yes milady?" he asked.

"Albert, did Harrison mentioned when he was due back with the motor?" Robert asked, taking over.

"Right about now Lord Grantham," Albert mentioned. "I suspect the snow is making driving more difficult."

"Right," he nodded. "Was he dropping Mrs. Crawley off before?"

"I was under the impression Mrs. Crawley was dining here this evening, along with the Dowager Countess my lord," Albert said.

"Right you are," Robert suddenly sat down.

"Thank you Albert, you may go," Cora told him. "Robert," she whispered harshly. "Mary is _pregnant_."

"Do not worry until after the dressing gong my dear," Robert reassured.

* * *

"What?" Matthew suddenly exclaimed.

"I'm in-" Mary began but broke off with a sudden groan. Matthew felt a pool of water around his feet. "My water broke."

"Harrison, can you get us to the house safely?" Matthew asked immediately to the chauffer whose face went white with shock and embarrassment at the condition of Mary.

"I'm afraid you don't have time for that Matthew," Isobel said, suddenly getting out of the car. Harrison was quick to think and did so as well.

"Mother, what on earth are you doing?" he asked as Isobel climbed into the small backseat.

"AH!" Mary clenched her teeth, her hands grasping the material of her dress in agony. "I am NOT having this baby here, in the middle of the road."

"I'm afraid, my dear, that your baby has a different plan," Isobel said.

"No," Mary shook her head. "With William and Bertie, there was hours before I-" she broke off again, clutching her stomach.

"Mother, are you sure," Matthew whispered.

"If her water has already broken and the contractions are coming that fast, yes," Isobel informed her. "And if I stand corrected this might not have been the first time you've felt this today." Mary bit her lip and drew a painful breath. She refused to meet Matthew's eye.

"Mary?" Matthew questioned.

"Earlier this afternoon, yes," Mary said through clenched teeth, still staring straight forward as if she could still prevent this from happening. "Before you say anything Matthew I thought it was false! That's why I kept sitting down!"

"Mary, you need to be ready," Isobel braced her. "I think it's almost time."

"Matthew," Mary breathed. "Please get out of the car or something… it's not proper."

"There's no way I am leaving you, or our child," Matthew protested. "I'm staying, you can hold my hand."

"I'm serious Matthew, get out!" Mary exclaimed. She hadn't even realized she was now grasping onto his arm as a wave of pain hit her again. "Oh God! Matthew _please_ get OUT!"

"Are you truly going to make him stand in the snow?" Isobel questioned.

"Well Harrison is!" Mary snapped until she realized why. He was exploring to see how much further they could truly get as well attempt to clear a path to the road. "Help him," was her last ditch attempt to get Matthew out, finally resigning herself that she was having this baby in the car.

"Sorry my darling but you can't get rid of me that easily," Matthew brushed her hair back. That's when he realized how much pain she was truly in. With Bertie he had been there at the beginning and was ushered out by Dr. Clarkson almost immediately. "Hold my hand, as tight as you can. We'll do this together. Just breathe."

"The only one who is doing anything is-" Mary muttered. "Oh my," she gasped.

"Breathe Mary, just keep breathing," Matthew whispered in her ear as she let out another moan. The contractions were getting closer and closer together, and to Mary it felt like more and more painful.

"Matthew, lean against the window and hold her up," Isobel instructed. "Mary, just lie back and hold his hand, you'll be fine. And remember to breathe." Mary nodded, realization suddenly settling in. It was cold. She only had a nurse with her, no doctor. There was a very large possibility something could go horribly wrong.

"She will be fine, right?" Matthew whispered, terrified. "They will both be alright, right?"

"I was with Dr. Clarkson both with William and Bertie Matthew, I know what I am doing," Isobel said confidently. "Ok Mary, I must… check."

"Of course," she gritted out. Matthew's grip on her tightened, she was breathing so heavily and in so much pain no wonder the men were seldom allowed in the room.

"It won't be long now," she promised, she rubbed her knee comfortingly. "Next contraction, I want you to push."

"Already," Mary's voice was panicky and out of breath. "But… but…"

"I'm right here love, squeeze my hand," Matthew breathed in her ear. Mary tried a confident smile, but failed miserably.

"You might regret saying that," she whispered.

"Sir, if I go slowly I could," Harrison began, getting back in the driver's seat.

"GET OUT!" Mary screamed. Matthew felt bad for the poor chap but he had terrible timing.

"Ok Mary, are you ready dear?" Isobel questioned.

"Yes," she gulped, her hand closing tightly around Matthew's, her eyes closing for a brief moment without pain.

"Push," Isobel commanded. Matthew gritted his teeth as the strangled cry escaped out of his wife's mouth, her hand tightening so hard on his, if she wasn't so slight she might have broken it.

"You are doing brilliantly," Matthew murmured in her ear. "You can do it my darling." For how quickly the labor progressed, it took five pushes just for the head to crown. Matthew's hand was beginning to go numb, Mary's cries too weak to be any more than whimpers. He felt her shiver and wished he thought to put his jacket on her when he had the chance.

When it was over, he felt Mary's body give a shudder as she collapsed against him. Her screams replaced with the wail of a baby.

"I'm so proud of you, I love you so much," Matthew sighed. Mary couldn't respond, she was too exhausted, anxious, and cold. Matthew shed his jacket immediately and placed it over her shoulders.

"Isobel," she murmured. Coincidently, blankets had been on the list of things Isobel had bought for them, so as she looked up towards the baby, it was almost cleaned off. She felt Matthew stiffen when he saw the blood and if she did not want to hold her baby so badly, she would have made a remark.

"Mother," Matthew said.

"It's a girl," Isobel beamed and Mary let out a short cry of delight as she handed her off to Mary gently, swaddled in several blankets.

"Oh," she whispered, turning to Matthew. "Oh my darling." Matthew was not even looking at her; his eyes were on the gorgeous baby girl safe in her arms.

"A girl," he smiled. "A baby girl."

"Hello my darling little girl," Mary breathed. "You didn't want to wait to meet your Mama and Papa, did you? Despite the circumstances, I'm quite glad."

"She's you," Matthew choked out. "Just as equally beautiful."

"Oh Matthew you might have your hands full," Mary chuckled as the baby blinked open her eyes and revealed golden brown orbs that matched Mary's perfectly. A tear escaped Mary's eye. Her boys were Matthew, blue eyes, blond hair or in William's case dirty blond hair that looked like a mix between her hair and Matthew's. Her baby girl, was her, completely and utterly her.

"Do you think she knows, how long we have waited for her, how much we wanted her," Matthew asked, not daring to take her out of her mother's arms just yet.

"She doesn't know much of anything yet my darling, she's minutes old," Mary watched as one of her hands reached out and grasped onto Mary's hair.

"Does she know how much we love her," Matthew tentatively reached out a hand to stroke her downy baby hair.

"I just gave birth to her in a car," Mary said. "I think she knows that."

He suddenly looked at his own mother who was busying herself, wrapping something into the bag that had once held the blankets his girl was now swaddled in. "What on earth are you doing Mother?"

"I'm just getting rid of the-"

"Isobel please," Mary sighed. "He witnessed too much already."

"Nothing in the world would have kept me away from this moment," Matthew pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"Milady," Harrison said quietly. "Do you think it would be okay if I start driving again, we'll go slowly?"

"Yes, of course," Mary nodded, closing her eyes, hardly believing the ordeal she just went through.

"Be careful," Matthew warned. "We have precious cargo now."

"Yes sir," he nodded and hopped into the driver's seat again. Isobel sat in front.

"We must go as fast as you can manage," she informed him. "Mary and the baby need to see the doctor and we must get them out of the cold. Do you think that you could safely get Dr. Clarkson after you drop us off?"

"Yes Ma'am," he nodded. Comforted, Mary snuggled up into Matthew, holding her baby girl close to her chest.

"I love you Matthew," she whispered. "I love our family."

"What should we name her?" Matthew questioned.

"Something equally as beautiful as she is," Mary said. "But… tomorrow." She looked out the window, noticing for the first time how dark it was.

"Sounds good to me," he said, pulling both his girls as close as he could as the car began to move, once he is no longer worried and they are safe at Downton, this will be a rather comical situation.

* * *

So that escalated quickly ;) You can assume that Lily Crawley is that baby in the car if you want (you most likely are right haha!) Next chapter is everyone's reaction to you know, Mary giving birth in a car…

Please let me know what you think by reviewing, I'd be open to any suggestions that you want for this story!


	4. Chapter 4

_Life of a Lily Chapter 4_

_This chapter picks up right from the last one._

* * *

Cora felt a lump in her throat as she handed her crying grandson off to a nanny. He was too old to be rocked anymore, but his usual nighttime routine of his Mama and Papa tucking him in would be broken for the first time he probably could remember. Even William managed to whimper, "Mama, Papa."

"They'll be here when you wake," she reassured and left the nursery to go downstairs. "I hope." Hesitantly, the scene unfolded downstairs.

"That was the Dowager Countess milady," Carson informed her getting off the phone. "She was inquiring whether she was still expected for dinner because no one has arrived for her, I informed her of the present situation and she wishes to be updated the moment we know something."

"Very well Carson, thank you," Cora breathed. "Oh where could they be?"

"Harrison is a very capable driver milady," Carson reassured her.

"I'm sure he is but Mary is pregnant, what if something goes wrong," she fretted, turning to her husband who was looking out into the snow. "They tried so hard to get pregnant again Robert what if-"

"If I may say, Matthew would go to the ends of the earth to protect them, protect them both," Tom said confidently.

"Should we send out a search party," Robert finally spoke up.

"It would be cruel to make anyone go out in this," Tom mentioned. "Not to mention dangerous."

"Telephone Crawley House, perhaps they stopped there to ride it out," Cora said.

"We've already done so Cora," Robert said.

"Are you not worried?" Cora asked. "Perhaps Sir Anthony and Edith! Their house is close to Ripon, maybe…" She broke off rushing hastily to the telephone.

"Can I get you anything my lord?" Carson asked.

"No, no that's alright Carson," he muttered. "I'm fine, you may go downstairs if you wish, reassure everyone."

"Of course my lord," Carson nodded.

"And I know you are worried about her too Carson, I appreciate it," Robert told him. He didn't hear what Carson muttered; only saw lights outside and a car driving fairly slowly towards the house. "Dear God! It's the motor!"

"What?" Cora rejoiced from the other room.

"It's them," he breathed and walked briskly to the front door and outside. None of them were prepared to see what they did. Isobel got out of the car and seemingly helped Mary out of it who looked rather disheveled, Matthew following behind, while Harrison drove off again. When the car left, the trio stepped forward. They weren't just a trio.

"Oh my dear," Cora gasped. In Matthew's arms, was a baby, Mary looked exhausted and was leaning on Isobel, visibly no longer pregnant. Mary looked up tiredly and smiled weakly at their shocked faces.

"Don't they have a story to tell us," Tom chuckled.

"Come inside, quickly," Robert hissed. "James! Tell Mrs. Patmore we need food, any of it that she can find to give them!"

"Papa, it's fine," Mary murmured. "I'm too tired to eat anyway."

"Is it a-" Cora whispered, still in shock.

"A girl," Matthew beamed. "Harrison's gone to fetch Clarkson." He handed the baby off to her grandmother and went to Mary's side to guide her in.

"How on earth did this happen?" Robert asked as they let Mary rest in the library briefly.

"It's all my fault," she sighed. "I'd thought it was false so I didn't say anything."

"It's no such thing," Matthew said. "I should have forbid you to go out, I went with you, I encouraged it."

"If you forbade me darling I would have insisted I go," Mary sighed, looking up at her mother who had yet to take an eye off the baby in her arms. It took a trained eye to see the tears in the corner of her eyes.

"But still," Matthew rubbed her back gently, desperately trying to keep her awake before the doctor got there.

"But I'm so glad you did," Mary whispered weakly. "I don't know if I could have done it without you, or your mother."

"Do you think you can manage the stairs milady?" Carson asked. "The maids have turned down your bed for you and-"

"I… I don't know," Mary said, biting her lip. She didn't like to admit to being weak, but the ordeal she just went through has left her downright exhausted. Plus

"Well then," Matthew said, bending down and scooping her up in his arms. "Cora do you have the baby?"

"Yes," she smiled proudly. "Oh Mary, she's the most gorgeous baby I might have ever seen. She's.. she's…"

"Matthew," Mary snapped. "You will hurt your back!"

"You are worth it," he said and began climbing the stairs carefully. Robert slipped ahead of them to open the door to the bedroom. The baby's bassinet for when they would have her sleep with them was already there.

"Robert do ask someone to get rid of that for tonight," Cora said. "The baby mustn't be in here when Mary needs to rest."

"No Mama," Mary whispered. "The bassinet stays here, she shall sleep here tonight."

"But Mary darling," she protested. "If you would have had the baby here a nurse would have taken her for the night."

"But I didn't Mama, Matthew and I can manage, I did not have the baby here, he shall sleep in here tonight as well," Mary said. Matthew placed her in bed and whispered in her ear.

"What happened to Lady Mary, the one who loved tradition," he smirked.

"She had a baby in a car," she sighed, her eyes suddenly drooping.

"My lord, Dr. Clarkson is here," Carson announced.

"Send him up," Robert said, quickly excusing himself from the room. Despite how many 'rules' they were breaking, Cora, Isobel, and Matthew stayed in the room while Clarkson went, first over Mary, then the baby, with a fine toothed comb.

"You've got a strong baby girl there Lady Mary," Clarkson smiled. "Mr. Crawley, you won't know what to do with yourself in a few years."

"She'll not be married till she's thirty, or later," he announced and everyone laughed quietly, not to wake up the baby.

"I suggest you all get some rest," Clarkson said. "It's been an eventful night." Anna rushed in and helped Mary quickly change out of her dress and into a nightgown, Isobel, who was now holding the baby, was even hesitant to leave the baby in their room.

"I want her near me," Mary sighed. "I don't care if this is not how it is usually done. We've just been through a lot together in under an hour. May I have her for a moment?"

"Of course my dear," Isobel said and placed her in her mother's arms. They excused themselves leaving Matthew, Mary, and the baby.

"I cannot believe she is here," Mary whispered. "I'm so happy and so tired."

"I do believe we are in for something," Matthew said as Mary pressed a kiss to her sleeping daughter's nose before giving her to him. Matthew barely had time to stand up before Mary was fast asleep. Using his time wisely, Matthew began to talk softly to his daughter.

"You do not know how much I love you," Matthew whispered. "And I hope in time I will be able to show you. You may not agree with me most of the time, you may think I'm being unreasonably strict, but I love you so much my darling and I am only doing it because I want nothing to ever happen to you. You are my sweet girl, I have known you only for hours but my heart belongs to you." The baby blinked open her eyes and looked towards her father inquisitively. "I thought I would love no other girl or woman more than I love your mother until today. I have two girls in my life and I'm not about to change that." The baby yawned. Carefully he placed her in the bassinet, turned off the light, and climbed into bed next to his wife.

* * *

"Lady Mary and Mr. Crawley have returned safely and with quite a surprise," Mrs. Hughes announced downstairs.

"What is it?" Ivy asked.

"Lady Mary has had the baby," Carson informed them all.

"In the car," Daisy gasped. "Is that safe?"

"Of course it isn't safe," O'Brien rolled her eyes.

"Are they okay Mr. Carson?" Alfred asked.

"Yes, Lady Mary and the baby are perfectly well, but I must remind you that they need rest and that we have a baby in the house again," Carson said.

"What sex is it?" Mrs. Patmore asked.

"A girl," Carson smiled. "Now all of you, back to work." Carson dismissed himself.

"And she looks exactly like Lady Mary," Mrs. Hughes commented to Mrs. Patmore.

"So in sixteen years, we're in for another one," she laughed.

"I don't know about sixteen Mrs. Patmore… maybe six."

* * *

"What on earth are you doing on your feet?" Matthew said as he opened his eyes for what felt like the sixth time since initially laying down his head. He was surprised to see the sun was up and it was the morning. His wife was standing over the bassinet.

"I'm being her mother, which you would not allow me to be last night," Mary huffed. "I am much less tired now."

"But sore?" Matthew said sternly. "Are you still sore? Dr. Clarkson said you should not be out of bed if you are sore."

"I shall be sore for days Matthew," she dismissed.

"Is she awake?"

"Yes, just blinking up at me with those beautiful brown eyes," Mary beamed.

"Bring her here then," Matthew smiled. Mary picked up the baby and brought her to her side of the bed to lie back down, trying not to let Matthew see her wince as she did.

"How did we ever get so lucky Matthew?" Mary asked. "Two beautiful boys and now this perfect angel?"

"I don't know about luck," Matthew chuckled. "I did almost die after William was born."

"And that is why you never bought another blasted car," Mary rolled her eyes, her hand patting his cheek. She leaned her head on her shoulder and they both looked fondly at their daughter. They watched as the baby began to make a sucking noise with her mouth and let out a tiny cry. "Oh dear, she's hungry I think."

"Would you like me to leave my darling?" Matthew whispered, although he would rather not.

"No, no," Mary shook her head. "It may not be proper but neither was last night." She shifted her nightgown down and lifted the baby up to her chest. Immediately she began to feed. "And it's not like you haven't seen all of this before."

"Indeed," Matthew smiled widely. "Although I don't think I have ever seen something so beautiful."

"I can hear Granny now," Mary whispered.

"I don't care," Matthew kissed her cheek and Mary smiled fondly at him, and then together they both looked down at their daughter.

"What should we name her?"

"I don't know," Matthew said. "You were so convinced we were having a boy, I was sure you were set on Reggie."

"Our daughter will not be called Reggie Matthew," Mary teased. "Something… something pretty."

"Like Mary," Matthew raised his eyebrow and Mary smacked him on the chest, the baby let out a squeak from being detached from her mother's breast for a brief second. "She doesn't like her Mama hitting her Papa."

"Oh Matthew, you are such a-"

"A what?" Matthew leaned in and kissed her on the lips.

"Lily," she whispered suddenly, her eyes staring intently at the baby. "What about Lily? Miss Lily Crawley?"

"I think I've never heard a more perfect name," Matthew beamed. "But what about the middle name? The only thing you ever considered was Violet? Lily Violet sounds too… too…"

"Flowery might be the word you are looking for darling, and I agree completely," Mary nodded. "Granny might be upset, but I have the perfect middle name for her."

"And what might that be?"

* * *

"Come on Bertie darling," Isobel led her youngest grandson down the hall.

"Gran Iz, Grandmama, where are we going?" William asked.

"To see your Mama and Papa," Cora answered. "They have something or rather someone to show you." Even William didn't seem to know what was going on, so when they knocked on the door and Matthew told them to come in, Cora and Isobel were excited to watch the scene unfold.

"Bertie, William, there is someone we would like you to meet," Mary said as Matthew lifted the boys onto the bed one and a time.

"Mama no belly," Bertie pointed out, reaching for his mother's now almost flat stomach.

"Yes, Mama does not have her belly anymore because you see, you have a baby sister," Matthew explained, taking the baby out of the bassinet.

"Sister?" Bertie said excitedly.

"A sister," William muttered.

"Pretty," Bertie gasped as she was placed in Mary's arms. He scrambled to get a closer look but Matthew held the boy back.

"You must be careful," he warned. "She won't be able to play for a while, she's still rather little."

"Name?" Bertie asked.

"Meet Lily Isobel Crawley," Mary introduced and immediately looked up at her mother-in-law for a reaction.

"Oh my dears," Isobel whispered, tears springing to her eyes.

"If it wasn't for you Mother, who knows what would have happened," Matthew looked up from his family.

"I approve," Cora nodded, patting Isobel's back. "Now I believe we should let them be for a while, don't you?" Isobel leaned over her grandchildren and kissed Mary's cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered gratefully.

"Thank you," Mary reiterated. "Matthew was right. You brought her into the world, she should remind us of you every time we call her by her full Christian name." Matthew grabbed his mother's hand, squeezed it reassuringly, and she left the room. "William, do you want to hold your baby sister?" Mary asked.

"Me! Me!" Bertie exclaimed. "I can, I held Lizzie and Theo!"

"Yes you did, but William is older, would he like to first?" Matthew said.

"No," the six year old huffed and jumped off the bed. "I want a brother, give her back!"

"I'm sorry my darling, but we cannot, we love Lily already, just as much as we love you," Mary told her boy sadly.

"More," he muttered. Mary handed Lily off to Matthew so he could help Bertie hold her.

"More," Mary gasped, getting out of bed no matter how sore she was. "I love all three of you equally. You are my handsome little prince."

"You wanted a girl," William said. "I know you did!"

"William dear, do you remember when Mama lost her baby?" Mary bit her lip. "If you don't that is ok, I just remember how dearly you wanted a sister."

"Not anymore," he was on the verge of a tantrum and Mary scooped him up in her arms.

"You know you don't have to protect Bertie, he is a boy, just like you," Mary pointed at him, touching her finger to his nose. "But Lily, Lily you get to be her big brother. I never had one; I was the oldest you see. And being the oldest, especially an older brother, mean's that not only we will love you, but Lily will love you very much because you protect her."

"Like a knight!" William suddenly perked up. He waved his arm like he had a sword in his hand.

"Yes my darling boy, like a knight, you have a big responsibility now… and we need to know if we can trust you," Mary said. He was still too little to understand anything about heirs and titles, but Mary imagined this was how the conversation would be when they tell him he will be the future Earl of Grantham.

"You can," he nodded enthusiastically.

"And Bertie will be her big brother too," Mary added. "He's too little to know what that means; you must teach him how to be a good big brother to her."

"I will," he nodded again.

"Would you like to hold her now?"

"Bertie my turn!" he chirped and the baby let out a whimper.

"Do remember now my dear chap, you must be quiet," Matthew whispered. "Lily doesn't like loud noises."

"Shhhh," Bertie put his fingers to his lips as Lily was taken out of his arms. William didn't need much help holding Lily, but Mary was still watching over him intently. She didn't go through such an ordeal to have her baby girl that she would just let them go.

"Look at them," Matthew smiled.

"We've got our family Matthew," Mary sighed, leaning into his embrace. Watching her two boys interact their daughter brought tears to her eyes.

* * *

_This was a fluffy chapter where basically I just wanted them to name her, this is the last chapter of Lily as a newborn, the next chapters are going to go a bit faster because they are going to show random moments of her growing up (still a baby) and Mary/Matthew parenting, Bertie and William being siblings, and her relationships with all of the Crawley family. There is a point to this story, and we will get there eventually, but for now just sit back and enjoy watching them all fumble through it all. Every moment you see has something to do with the main thing no matter how big or small it might seem once we get there!_

_Please review and let me know what you think (: If you have any ideas for a chapter/a moment, please let me know this story is not completely set in stone!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey (: _

_This chapter and a few of them following is mainly random moments of Lily with random characters at different milestones in her early life. This one involves a lot of crying…_

* * *

_6 months…_

Mary shot up in bed as a wail was heard echoing the hallway, she was very thankful she stole the day nursery years ago, having converted the previous night nursery into a day nursery and making the new night nursery rather close to their room.

"Lily," Mary whispered harshly and untangled herself from the covers and her husband. This was an unusual occurrence seeing as their baby girl had recently begun to sleep through the night and everyone in the house began to get full nights of sleep again. She was thankful for Mrs. Jensen, she really was. There were always days that she could barely wrestle Bertie and William in or out of clothes, change Lily's nappy, or have the patience to get soaked attempting to bathe her sons; but there was something about letting her soothe her wailing child that did not thrill her.

Matthew was right behind her as the entered the nursery. William and Bertie looked up at their parents miserably. Mrs. Jensen was just about to pick up the baby.

"Lily loud," Bertie whimpered.

"Let me," Mary demanded. "You help the boys back to sleep." Her daughter in her arms, she immediately felt heat. "Matthew," she gasped. "Feel her, does she seem warm to you?" Matthew placed a tender hand on his daughter's cheek and looked closely.

"Oh my darling," Matthew shook his head. "She's gotten her first tooth."

"Oh dear," Mary shook her head pressing a kiss to the baby's head. "Let us take her in our room for the night so the boys and Mrs. Jensen can rest."

"I do not mind milady, staying up with her," Jensen commented.

"Thank you, but if she's anything like me, she'll be fussing all night and perhaps her Mama and Papa can help," Mary nodded. The baby hiccupped from crying so hard, her face scrunched up in pain. "Oh my darling girl, it will all be okay." She sat in bed and cradled the sobbing girl to her chest and stroked her hair to provide a small amount of comfort in a very uncomfortable situation.

"I do not remember William or Bertie wailing this much," concern was layered on Matthew's face.

"That is because Mama and Papa insisted we let Mrs. Jensen care for them," Mary whispered. "They did not wake up, so we have no one protesting to the way we parent."

"I love you my darling," Matthew whispered, pride in his voice. When he married Mary and they had discussed living somewhere else and he thought he convinced her, there was a glimmer of hope that they might be able to raise their children as he was raised, involved. Suddenly, his inheritance from Mr. Swire kept him tied to Downton and the second Mary was pregnant with William his mother-in-law was searching for nannies and nursing maids who would replace Sybbie's since she did not want to care for more than one child. When he woke up in the hospital after his accident and saw Mary there without the baby, even in his drugged up and foggy haze, he was sure the next words out of her mouth when he asked where the baby was would be the nanny. 'Anna has him,' she murmured. 'He still sleeps here but unfortunately I have been glued to your bedside, so I've only enough time to feed him.' Feed him. That had been the biggest shocker that Mary actually fed her son from her own breast which he knew her Granny expressly frowned upon.

"You should be caring for Lily right now," Mary hissed. "Get a cool rag, maybe it will help?"

"May I try?" Matthew whispered. Mary nodded and tried to hand of the baby to him, but he saw how her little hand clutched Mary's nightgown tightly and it took a lot of effort to detach her. Before she was even in his arms her wails escalated to hysterics. "Never mind." He kissed Mary's cheek and went off to get the rag. He came back with Mary lying almost flat on her back, the baby sprawled out on her chest, whimpers still escaping her mouth but as the baby shook with effort, Mary's hand was soothingly on her back and her head nestled on her breast. Instead of going to her, he took a step back, and watched them fondly.

"What is it?" Mary smiled, looking up from Lily.

"I love you," he repeated for the second time. "And I was right."

"You were right?" Mary lifted an eyebrow. "That might be a first." Matthew let out a dry laugh and climbed into bed, wheeling the bassinet closer to her side so that when Lily was asleep, Mary didn't have to get out of bed. He kissed her cheek gently and laid his hand over top of Mary's on Lily's back.

"You are such a wonderful mother," his eyes were sparkling and suddenly tears were in Mary's eyes. "Darling, have I upset you?"

"No Matthew," Mary whispered. "It's just, I never thought I would be this type of mother. Granny does not approve and nor does Papa but, I'm just so happy. My heart even breaks that we had to only focus on Lily tonight that William and Bertie could not partake in this."

"Has she calmed down?" Matthew asked.

"Yes, for now I believe she has cried herself to sleep I'm afraid," Mary bit her lip, not too fond of hearing that and feeling quite bad for her baby. Matthew smiled and got up. "Matthew where are you going?" he didn't answer and she tried to think of a way that she could get up to follow him without disturbing Lily. Before she could, Matthew reemerged with Bertie whimpering tiredly in his arms, and William following suit much more sleepily.

"Mama," Bertie smiled, no longer visibly upset from being woken up.

"My darlings," Mary smiled as Matthew settled Bertie into bed and allowed William to climb in before he got in. "I do hope you don't mind being woken up."

"They are used to it," Matthew smirked. "You are welcome."

"I can just hear Papa, Mama, and Mrs. Jensen groaning in the morning and thank god Sybbie is out of the nursery or we would not have enough room in this bed for ourselves," Mary chuckled as she gently lifted Lily off her chest and placed her in the bassinet. She turned over, wrapping her arms around her youngest son, breathing in the nursery smell in his hair contently.

"Goodnight my love," Matthew whispered over his now sleeping children and turned the night off.

"I love you," Mary mumbled sleepily before sleep claimed her the second her head hit the pillow.

* * *

_9 months…_

"Do you ever wonder what Sybil would think of us?" Edith's voice was in her ear. Mary was shook from her previous thought as she stared mindlessly out towards the Cricket match.

"What on earth do you mean?" Mary asked.

"Just look at our families, did you ever think?" Edith nodded to the small area beside the tent where they resided. There Lizzie and Sybil struggled to keep up with Theo, William, and Bertie who were running around giggling wildly, Sybil and William pausing every few minutes to cheer for the house team, being the only ones old enough to understand the game.

"No, I certainly did not," Mary smiled fondly. A wail erupted from the bassinet that was sitting behind them. Mary stood up.

"Let the nanny get her," Edith shrugged turning back towards the game.

"When will you learn Edith that I married a solicitor, I can take care of my own child," Mary told her, picking nine month old Lily in her arms. "Yes Granny I know what you will say." Mary commented to Violet.

"I said no such thing," Violet commented.

"I think it's wonderful," Isobel smiled at her daughter in law and Mary nodded gratefully.

"You would," Violet sniffed. Mary made her way back to her sister.

"A solicitor who one day will make you Countess of Grantham, I'm not afraid to say it," Edith rolled her eyes. "Although you could say you were unconventional from the start with Lily."

"I very well could, couldn't I?" Mary chuckled softly as she watched the men come off the field. The house was losing to the village, like always, even with Tom and Matthew on the team. "Shhh my darling," Mary patted the baby's back and bounced up and down.

"Papa! You dropped the ball!" William pointed out as Matthew came into view. Matthew looked over at Mary amused, who smirked back at him.

"I can play!" Bertie piped up.

"My dear chap, I'm sorry, but you'll just have to wait a few years till you can play," Matthew laughed.

"How many?" Bertie asked.

"Too many my darling, now go play with your cousins, but do be careful," Mary called to him, walking over to Matthew still trying to calm a now wailing Lily. He kissed her on the cheek briefly before holding out his arms for his daughter who was holding out his arms for him.

"Whatever is the matter Lily girl," Matthew asked the baby playfully. "You think it's terrible how bad your Papa is at cricket?"

"You are not terrible Matthew," Robert said clapping him on the back.

"Papa why you no play?" Lizzie asked Sir Anthony.

"I'm afraid I'm too old," he patted her head with his good arm, the real reason he could not play.

"Elizabeth please go with your brother unless you want nanny to come over," Edith threatened lightly. The three year old scurried away with fear in her eyes, Mary rolled her eyes.

"What on earth is the matter with Lily?" Cora asked as the baby still wailed in her Papa's arms.

"I feel it terrible to say it, but she still looks adorable, crying and all," Edith said under her breath and Mary let out a quick laugh.

"Oh Edith," she shook her head. "Now Matthew let me try again?"

"I've got it Mary," Matthew dismissed her and walked out from under the tent. "Shhh my darling girl, my sweet girl you'll be tired after all this crying."

"Matthew keep her out of the sun, that will not help," Mary snapped.

"She's got a bonnet," he shrugged lifting the baby up in the air to perhaps get a laugh out of her to no avail.

"All this crying is making me agitated," Violet shuffled in her seat under the tent. "Maybe she likes the nanny Mary dear, you ever think of that?"

"Granny the nanny is not even here at the moment," Mary informed her. "We sent her back to the house for now."

"Come on darling, stop crying for Papa," Matthew pressed a kiss to her head, her curly brown hair tickling his nose. The baby's cries finally started to die down to whimpers and she turned to face Matthew.

"Pa," she reached out to him. "Pa." Everyone froze. This was definitely different than her usual baby speak.

"Oh her first word!" Mary exclaimed and hurried towards her husband and daughter. "Oh my Lily you've said your first word!"

"Pa," Matthew whispered and pressed another kiss to her cheek this time. "Lily you have made your Pa very _very_ happy." The baby giggled now, her previous wailing abandoned, and touched Matthew's face. "She's growing up…" Matthew trailed off. "Too fast."

"It's alright darling, she'll always be your little girl," Mary patted his cheek fondly, her hands covering Lily's.

"Times up," Dr. Clarkson called and ran off to call the village over.

"Matthew put the baby down, it is time to play," Robert called, regretfully Matthew handed Lily back to Mary.

"Pa," she whimpered reaching out for him. With a smile Matthew kissed her outstretched hand before kissing Mary's cheek and promised he would be back. Mary nuzzled the baby into her chest to quickly calm her and watched as Matthew joined the house team, Tom giving him a congratulatory pat on the back.

"Good job Lily girl," she murmured, pressing a gently kiss to the baby's head.

"Mama when can Lily say my name?" Bertie asked.

"Probably not for a while yet Bertie," Mary answered.

"Why not, I'm her big brother," he complained.

"I'm her bigger brother," William retorted. "Right Mama?"

"You are both her big brothers," Mary settled the argument quickly. "No fighting or I will send you both back to the house."

"Kiss?" Bertie asked and Mary smiled and bent down, rather shocked when he didn't kiss her, but kissed Lily who gurgled in response.

"None for your Mama?" a tear threatened to slip down Mary's cheek.

"Mama," he giggled and kissed her cheek halfheartedly before turning to the game and cheering only because Sybbie and William began to.

"Oh my Lily, you are growing up too fast…" she looked up and felt a twinge of a smile fall upon her lips as Matthew actually hit the ball, it soaring over the heads of most of the villagers. "All of you are."

* * *

_Like I said, a lot of crying. But a lot of cute moments too! And a lot of firsts like first tooth and a first word! If there are any other moments you want to see, please let me know, and if you have any ideas for it I'd be open for suggestions!_

_Please let me know what you think, even if it is a short review like 'Great chapter' or anything else it would be much appreciate, just to let me know you are reading and interested!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: Don't own it!_

_This chapter is one of the last "firsts" chapters for Lily, we shall slowly begin to get into the main part of the story. More fluff and more moments with the Crawley's, hope you enjoy!_

* * *

_11 months…_

"Ma! Ma!" Lily giggled and clapped her hands together as Mary sat across the drawing room from her.

"She's quite the adventurer," Cora nodded as the baby began to crawl towards her mother.

"Are you sure it is wise to leave her wandering the house?" Violet asked.

"It's hardly wandering if I am here," Mary informed her. "You never let Papa or Aunt Rosamund out of their crib or the pram when they were little?"

"I'm sure their nanny did, where is Mrs. Jensen anyway?" Violet said.

"With Bertie, he's throwing a fit over the fact that William has moved out of the nursery and she suggested I leave her to handle it," she answered. "I can deal with tantrums, but not of this caliber."

"Are you looking forward to the holidays?" Cora asked her daughter.

"Of course, it might be my last first Christmas with any of my children," Mary sighed wistfully putting down her tea to hold out her arms to help Lily to a standing position. With her help the baby took a few steps and with hope Mary let go only to watch as the baby sat down with a bump. "Oh you little cheater, Mama will not be here forever to help stand you up."

"She's almost a year old my dear, it won't be long now before you'll need Mrs. Jensen to help keep an eye on her," Cora reminded her.

"What else do I have to do besides watch her?" Mary shrugged.

"I could think of several things," Violet retorted.

"Granny you must keep up with the times," she said with a small shake of her head. "Mothers are becoming more and more involved with their children's lives and soon she'll be the only one of them in the nursery, Mrs. Jensen will hardly have anything to do. Sybbie's governess Miss Emily will be teaching William and Bertie, till they are old enough for a tutor. Perhaps, even Matthew and I are discussing sending them to boarding school, together of course, but-"

"Lady Mary," Carson interrupted.

"Yes Carson," she turned to him.

"Sorry to interrupt milady but Miss Emily would like a word with you," Carson informed her.

"Ma," Lily looked up at her.

"Mama, Granny would you mind watching her just for a moment," she asked, and didn't bother to listen to their answer before rising to her feet and leaving the room.

"Does she think we are the nanny?" Violet asked.

"No Mama but she is your great-granddaughter," Cora pointed out as the little girl dragged one of her stuffed animals to her mouth and began chewing with a devilish smile, she knew her Mama would yell at her but she was gone.

"No Lily," Cora told her and took the stuffed dog out of her mouth. Her bottom lip began trembling and she reached out in the direction Mary disappeared to.

"Ma," she cried.

"Your Mama will be back in a moment, you have time to spend with your Grandmama and Granny," Cora told the baby. Almost one, she was beginning to understand words more and more, and Grandmama and Granny were new to her. She reached out her arms not for Cora but Violet.

"That means she wants to be picked up," Cora informed her mother-in-law.

"I'm aware Cora," Violet said. She watched as the baby frowned as her request was not granted, on her little hands and knees she crawled over to where the Dowager sat and used the fabric of the settee to pull herself up as she had quite mastered already. She grasped onto it tightly and walked her chubby legs over to the spot where Violet was, her tiny hands now holding onto her dress. "Stubborn little thing, isn't she… but she is Mary's daughter."

"Mama, here let me-" Cora began.

"No, no," Violet shook her head. "I don't have to raise her, doesn't mean I can't indulge her." Cora looked surprised as Violet lifted the little girl onto her lap and content, she began to babble and reach up to pat Violet's face. "Oh dear me, perhaps I've indulged her too much."

"I must insist-" Cora said again.

"At least I put down my tea," she chuckled and grabbed the little girls hands. "My my, she looks more and more like our Mary every day, she's such a gorgeous child." Even though she didn't know exactly what Violet was saying Lily giggled and beamed. "And just as aware of that fact I might add."

"She just wanted to inform me that she was shocked my son could-" Mary began. "Granny, are- I'm sorry."

"Whatever for?" Violet shrugged. "I may not like change, but it never stopped me from taking advantage of it."

"And what does that mean?" Mary smiled, sitting back down and watching in awe at her child on Violet's lap.

"If you are to let her wander-yes wander around the house while I am here, I shall pick her up whenever I please," she smiled, Mary could hardly believe her eyes as she rang the bell for Mrs. Jensen to get Lily for her nap, that the little girl had already curled up on Violet's lap and fallen asleep, and her Granny placed a tender hand on her back. Though Violet would never admit it, she was sorry to see the little girl go.

* * *

"I'm sorry but I can't imagine Cousin Violet doing so," Matthew shook his head as he stood in the doorway to the nursery and watched Mary change Lily's nappy before she went to bed. He watched Mrs. Jensen fuss around Bertie who was still recovering from his day of wailing, complaining, and soon after, punishment. "And I can't imagine what she would say if she knew you were doing that."

"Mrs. Jensen has Bertie because Bertie is now behaving, correct," Mary sent a stern look over at her mutinous looking five year, almost six year old.

"Yes Mama," he sighed and Matthew affectionately ruffled his hair.

"Just think my dear chap, you shan't be here for much longer," Matthew told him.

"Anyway, I am her mother, why should I not be allowed to change her nappy?" Mary sounded indignant.

"You are a lady Mary, ladies have nanny's to do that sort of thing," Matthew did his best impression of Violet and Mary chuckled softly. "No offense Mrs. Jensen, we value you ever so much and are thankful for all you do for us, it's just, we like to be parents sometimes."

"Of course Mr. Crawley," she nodded dutifully and bent down beside Bertie and whisper in his ear. With a look of exasperation the little boy nodded and stood up just as Mary was placing Lily into her crib.

"Mama," he sighed, gently tugging the bottom of her skirt. "I'm very sorry for today." Tears almost sprung to her eyes as she looked down at her son who was growing so old, standing straight, like a gentleman, his eyes full of hope that his Mama might forgive him.

"It's okay Bertie darling," Mary picked him up and kissed him on the cheek. "I know you miss William but as your Papa said it will not be for much longer, soon you will have your own room. But forgive me if I want you to be my little boy for just a while longer."

"I love you Mama," Bertie smiled and kissed her on the lips.

"You little flirt," Matthew chuckled and took him out of his arms and swung him around briefly. "Papa too? Do you love Papa too?"

"Yes!" Bertie giggled and kissed his father on the cheek before Matthew placed him in bed with a kiss on the head.

"Goodnight Bertie," Mary said before turning back to the crib, she bit her lip as Lily was already fast asleep having a fairly active day as more were sure to come with Christmas coming up.

"I guess she didn't need to be rocked tonight," Matthew rested his hand on her shoulder.

"Mhm hmm," Mary mumbled, nodded to Jensen, and left the room swiftly to get dressed for dinner. Matthew sighed and went to follow her before he decided it best to get dressed first and headed to his dressing room.

"Oh Anna," Mary cried. "She's almost walking, she wasn't rocked tonight, my baby girl is growing up too fast!"

"It's alright milady, she was out more than usual today, she'll have been tired," Anna reassured her as she began to fuss with her hair.

"So she'll be too tired to have our special moments where it is just Mama and Lily from now until New Years," there was clear distress in her voice.

"You mustn't think of it like that milady," Anna told her. "You've got a beautiful baby girl who will one day grow up to be a beautiful little girl and then a-"

"A Lady," Mary chuckled through her tears. "God, will I be punished for all the times I was downright horrible by having a daughter exactly like me."

"I don't know milady, Master William and Master Robert," Anna began.

"I wish you would call them William and Bertie," Mary rolled her eyes.

"Regardless, they both look like they will be a force to be reckoned with come time their sister has suitors," it was Anna's turn to chuckle.

"Good God my poor girl, she'll have William, Bertie, and Matthew against her and by default she'll have to love me more," Mary beamed.

"But who's name did she say first my darling," Matthew announced. Mary jumped.

"Matthew, I see you've stopped knocking when you enter my room," Mary smirked.

"Our room," Matthew corrected.

"I'll see you after dinner milady," Anna nodded and left the room.

"What were you talking about?" Matthew whispered bringing a hand to her cheek.

"Just that our daughter has three men that will be sure to prevent any other men from ever taking her away from us," Mary smiled. "And that it must be I who protects her."

"I must devise my plan now, a shot gun in the yard perhaps?" Matthew raised his eyebrow.

"Thank heavens you didn't have a sister," Mary shook her head and leaned in to kiss him. Matthew smiled and flipped them around so they could crash back on the bed.

"Aren't you worried I might make you untidy?" he chuckled.

"I've just changed my daughter's nappy, of course not," Mary breathed and deepened the kiss.

* * *

"Presents," Bertie trilled as he ran down the steps.

"Robert Matthew Crawley, what have I said time and time again, no running on the steps," Mary snapped. Bertie frowned and looked at Matthew in hope.

"Do not look at me like that," Matthew rolled his eyes at his youngest son. "So have I." With a huff Bertie slowed his pace but looked at the sitting room with anticipation as the servants were making last minute preparations for their luncheon.

"Happy Christmas!" Bertie yelled at them.

"Hush now," Matthew chastised. He looked at William who rolled his eyes at his little brother.

"You'll never be out of the nursery if you continue to act like that," he said with disdain. Mary, who was carrying Lily, fixed her dress and glowered at her older son.

"And you will not be talking like that to anyone," she looked at him sternly. "_Ever_."

"For once it seems like our Lily is the most behaved out of our children," Matthew smirked.

"Pa! Pa! Pa!" Lily giggled.

"Happy Christmas Mr. Carson," Bertie said copying William's superior tone in a very formal way.

"Happy Christmas Master Robert," he nodded. "Master William."

"Carson just called him Bertie please," Mary begged. "And William."

"Happy Christmas Milady," he said to her. "And you too Mr. Crawley and Miss Lily." Mary sighed, she would never get him to change his ways no matter how close they were getting out of the twenties and moving to the thirties. She was at least happy all of the staff called them by their Christian names instead of Master Crawley or Miss Crawley.

"Happy Christmas Carson," she smiled warmly at him anyway.

"I wonder if Mother or Cousin Violet have arrived yet?" Matthew wondered aloud.

"Mama, did you see, I acted like William?" Bertie said proudly.

"I'm so very proud my darling, but do not try and grow up too fast please," Mary said.

"It was good though, right Papa?" Bertie asked. Matthew chuckled.

"Yes of-" a servant opened the sitting room door and revealed everyone from the family already there; Edith, Anthony, Theo, Lizzie, Sybbie, Tom, Violet, Isobel, Cora, Robert, and her Aunt Rosamund who arrived for dinner last night.

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS!" Bertie squealed.

"See my love, he won't change," Matthew kissed her cheek before following his son who was barreling into the room.

"Presents!" Theo immediately exclaimed.

"Theodore Anthony," Edith hissed.

"But Mama you promised we would get our gifts when everyone was here," he protested.

"And have you got them yet, they can still take them back before they are opened if you act as such," Edith chastised.

"It's Christmas Edith," Mary said coming up to kiss her cheek. "Let them misbehave for one day. We are letting them have luncheon with us, are we not?"

"I suppose," Edith rolled her eyes but called Lizzie over to fix her dress even though she desperately wanted to run around with her cousins.

"Granny would you like to hold your newest little friend?" Mary chuckled as Lily immediately recognized Violet and held her arms out for her. "Can you say Granny Lily?" The baby gurgled and stuck her finger in her mouth.

"Mama, what is she talking about?" Robert looked surprised.

"Later Mary dear, after luncheon," Violet dismissed but no one missed the look intrigue as the baby continued to whine for her.

"Well if you won't I will," Isobel jumped at the opportunity. "Her first Christmas, how excited she would be if she had any idea what was going on?" With Lily safely in Isobel's arms Mary relaxed in a chair and watched as the family spoiled the children to no end, particularly Robert and Cora.

"Papa," Mary protested as she saw the number of lavish looking gifts they pulled out.

"Don't look at me, half of these are from your mother," he said.

"I've finally got another three girls to buy dresses for," she said excitedly.

"Mama you said only yesterday that Lily is only one," Mary said.

"Not even," Matthew added.

"That dress is the most modest thing she owns," Mary added. "And it's almost far too ornate for a family luncheon!"

"With the way Lizzie runs around it's a wonder I don't just put her in trousers," Edith commented.

"Oh I'd love to see that," Mary raised her eyebrows at her sister, noting that the nanny was nowhere in sight for the first time she had ever seen her sister with her children.

"She still looks adorable though," Isobel cooed at the baby.

"If you are all going to berate me then they will have no presents," Robert announced.

"No!" William, Bertie, and Theo chorused. Sybbie and Elizabeth looked distraught.

"Please don't be-be, berake Grandpapa," Bertie ran to his mother with a frown on his face. Mary laughed at him.

"Don't worry boys, I still have my present for you," Tom said.

"Thank you Uncle Tom!" Bertie giggled. They unwrapped his gifts immediately, while their grandfather gave them expensive gifts, books, and clothes, Tom's gifts were always the best.

"A toy sword," Bertie exclaimed pulling it out.

"Tom if my son pokes an eye out it will be your head," Mary threatened.

"Or if he pokes my sons eye out," Edith added as Mary was handed a gift for Lily by her mother. Of course, it was a deep navy dress that the little girl was likely to hate.

"For her birthday party in a month," Cora commented with a knowing smile. Mary watched carefully as Isobel passed Lily on to Aunt Rosamund.

"She looks more and more like you every day Mary, what poor chap will we set her on to?" she joked and everyone looked at the reaction of Matthew.

"No one for a very _very_ long time," Matthew narrowed his eyes and gently pushed Bertie away who was poking him with a sword.

"What about me Da?" Sybbie asked Tom. Tom clenched his fists.

"Ask your governess when it is suitable then add ten years," he commented.

"That's unfair," the eight year old huffed.

"Not too unfair my dear," Robert commented. "Now unless you don't want your gift that I promise has to do with that horse of yours, I suggest you continue to complain." Tom rolled his eyes at the mention of a horse and Mary met his eyes sympathetically. He did not approve at all of the gift Robert had given Sybbie at the tender age of seven but she loved the creature and he couldn't tell her she could not ride it. Sybbie ran over excitedly and kissed her Grandpapa's cheek before opening the present.

"How old will Lizzie and Lily be when you get them a horse Robert?" Rosamund asked.

"You should expect yours in a few years Edith," Mary whispered in her sister's ear as Rosamund handed off a fussy Lily back to Mary.

"Heavens, what am I to do with a horse," Edith commented. "There are no stables near-"

"Bertie watch out!" Isobel exclaimed suddenly as everyone watched as the little boy playfully stabbed Theo with his sword and swung it back, hitting directly into a plate that was precariously near the edge. Before anyone could do anything the china shattered around the two of them. Edith and Mary immediately stood up, placing Lily on the ground.

"Bertie," Mary gasped. His lips began to quiver as he looked at the pile of glass, china, and food around him. Luckily Theo had escaped most of it and ran crying into Edith's outstretched arms. After several minutes of the whole family fussing over them and trying to decide whether or not they should call the servants to clean it up now during their luncheon or later, Matthew turned to his wife.

"Where is Lily?" he asked worriedly. Mary's eyes widened and she turned to the spot where she dropped her by the settee.

"I thought someone would grab her," she whispered harshly. None of the adults had Lily in their arms but she was not longer in the last place they all saw her. "LIL-" They froze as suddenly a little head was seen wandering towards the open door.

"Oh my," Violet chuckled. She was not crawling to the door, no; she was running to the door on her chubby little legs. It seemed their baby girl skipped walking and fast forwarded to running, making a beeline out of the commotion.

"Oh she's walking!" Cora cheered.

"No Mama, she's running," Mary hissed as Matthew jogged to catch up to his baby daughter.

"Oh my darling girl," he smiled as quickly Lily's frown from being picked up was replaced by glee as she realized her Papa had picked her up.

"Pa! Pa!" she clapped her hands gleefully.

"Oh my Lily," Mary cooed. "You are walking, and on Christmas Day!"

"Ma!" she giggled and reached out to pat her mother's face while Mary gave her a quick kiss. Her legs began to kick wildly in her father's arms, clearly wanting to take advantage of her new skill. Bertie having had calmed down from his shock, now in Robert's arms, worriedly commented she might get hurt on the glass so they adults formed a barrier between her and the broken bits on the floor. Matthew set her down and they all watched amazed as she walked around, intrigued by how much interest they were taking in her. Before they knew it, she stopped in front of Violet.

"Gan!" she pointed to her. Violet smiled at picked the girl up and set her on her lap.

"I guess I shall settle for being her third word," she informed them all, straightening up proudly.

"Though if you want to be correct, my name to her truly is Gran," Isobel retorted.

"Oh hush, I don't see her walking to you," Violet huffed and asked for someone to make her a plate and that she would be eating luncheon with her great-granddaughter on her lap.

* * *

_Who would have ever though Violet would "indulge" her. Well that's just Lily, no one can say no to her ;) Imagine her as a Mini-Mary._

_Please let me know what you think, even if it is just a Great, Good, or even a negative review if you think I could improve in some way._

_Also let me know what you want to see in later chapters... I already have received requests: Protective brothers, protective father, and general banter, etc and trust me I have added a lot of that!_


	7. Chapter 7

_Life of a Lily Chapter 7_

_This is the last chapter of Lily at various introductory ages that establishes the relationships with the people in the family/staff that I want her to. Enjoy!_

_Sorry that this is not a new chapter and a repost of Chapter 7, I'd like to say that I deleted my original post only because I posted the wrong version of it and I had mistakes I wanted to fix, but I am guilty in wanting a few more reviews before the next chapter and I hoped reposting and fixing my mistakes would help achieve that. Sorry again :/_

_I consider this chapter really cute, and it also features the first section in Lily's POV._

* * *

_20 months..._

Lily Crawley's sleepy eyes blinked open and she looked around the nursery with a frown. Briefly she thought of crying out for her Papa who would come the second she called for him, but then she saw Ivy the kitchen maid in the corner of the room mending the fire, the only thing Lily knew was that it meant it was really early.

Her nanny was fast asleep, her snores filling the room, and the almost two year old desperately wanted to get out of her crib and start the day.

"Up," she decided for herself. "Over." She looked around her crib and remembered how close she had gotten the other day to escaping if Mrs. Jensen had not woken up. This time, her parents hadn't indulged her with the stuffed animals they put in with her. She curled against her mother much longer than usual last night, not wanting her to let go, and every time she tried to she cried again. Lily was out cold by the time Mary finally got her down and she hadn't managed to ask for more.

"Woof," she giggled as she threw her beloved stuffed dog out of the crib. She did not wish to use him in her endeavor. With as careful precision as a baby could do, she piled the stuffed animals she had into the corner of the crib until it reached as close to the top as it could.

Fearlessly Lily crawled to the top and stood on what she thought was her bear and smiled to herself as she pulled with all her strength and swung her leg over. Luckily, Ivy had already left the room, and she grasped the railing outside of the crib and slid down with a bump. Mrs. Jensen turned over, but did not wake.

Not only had Ivy woken her up, but she left the door to the nursery open. This was a mistake. It took little to no effort for the almost two year old to push open the door and close it behind her smiling mischieviously, as if she was the first toddler ever to escape her room.

Now free of her crib and nursery, Lily took a brief moment to clap for herself and giggle, and that's when she realized that despite how quiet the upstairs was, downstairs was bustling.

She looked down the hall and sighed as she realized both her brothers' rooms were closed and her parents' so she thought of the next best thing.

"Car," she decided and quietly walked to the big stair case. Suddenly she slipped on the carpet. It hurt her bum but instead of crying she reminded herself, "Shhh." She knew this was probably not the best idea and her Mama and Papa would not be happy with her if they caught her, so she had to be quiet.

"Bert," she nodded as she began to crawl backwards down the stairs. She was thankful for her big brother for teaching her how to go down the stairs safely as to not hurt herself, and it was much quicker than when both her Mama and Papa would hold onto her hands fairly tightly and guide her down when she insisted she could do it on her own.

She felt a sense of freedom, knowing she was going downstairs all by herself. Her Mama would occassionaly bring her downstairs when she would need to ask the servants to do something, but she was almost never allowed to be let down from her arms. And if she wasn't in her Mama's arms, she was usually held by either Carson, Anna, or even one time Alfred who had blushed the whole time as Lily was not very cooperative for the novice.

Everyone was too busy cleaning and bustling around to notice Lily once she made it to the bottom of the stairs. With a smile she heard Anna's voice, her mother's maid who Lily loved almost as much as Carson. But then she knew that Anna would take her back to the nursery and tell her parents and she couldn't let that happen, besides, she was looking for someone else.

"Down," she reaffirmed, knowing where her mother had carried her down. She saw where Anna disappeared to and followed without hesitation.

No one in the servant's hall quite knew what to do when she appeared there, hair sweaty and disheveled and still in her nightgown, looking rather proud of herself.

"Miss Lily!" Mrs. Hughes exclaimed.

"Car," she frowned, not seeing him.

"What on earth are you doing down here?" she asked.

"Car," she repeated.

"Are you looking for Mr. Carson?" her eyes widened. Lily's eyes lit up and she looked around.

"Lady Mary," Anna said hopefully, thinking she would be around the corner. "I'm sorry I-"

"No Mama Anna," Lily shook her head. "Me," she pointed to herself proudly.

"You got down here, all by yourself?" Mrs. Hughes.

"Me!" Lily exclaimed with a giggle as Anna's eyes widened and she scooped her up. Lily frowned and began to kick her legs. "No! No Anna!" She frowned at her mother's lady's maid.

"Well that's quite an accomplishment but I don't think the servant's hall is quite the place for a young lady such as yourself," Mrs. Hughes said.

"I'll take her back upstairs," Anna told them.

"NO!" Lily wailed. "CAR!"

"What is the commotion in here-" Carson began. "Anna, why do you have Miss Lily in your arms?"

"It seems that she had wandered down here all by herself," Mrs. Hughes explained.

"Ah," Carson said.

"Car!" Lily cheered up, throwing a mutinous look at Anna, before reaching her arms out for the older man who spoke so warmly and was always kind to her. Carson nodded for Anna to hand the baby to him.

"You all have work to do, go, I've got her now," Carson said.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Anna laughed slightly, even though Lily had no idea what she was talking about.

"Lady Mary," Mrs. Hughes nodded and they both left the room.

"Car!" Lily threw her arms around the butler.

"So you came down here all by yourself?" Carson asked her, climbing the stairs slowly.

"Me! Climb!" she said enthusiastically. "Bored, I bored."

"You were bored and wanted to come down here?" he asked.

"See you!" Lily trilled and Carson chuckled as she patted his cheek and smiled.

"Do you know how much you remind me of your mother Miss Lily," Carson laughed.

"Mama, me like?" she tipped her head.

"Very much so," Carson nodded. "She was always down here wanting to talk to me or run away."

"Away?" she was not familiar with that word yet.

"But you want to know what I always told her, when she was very young?" Carson asked, now on the ground floor and making his way to the stairs. Lily shook her head. "That downstairs was dangerous for little girls such as yourself, and that you don't want to get hurt."

"Ow," Lily shook her head.

"So, you shouldn't wander downstairs unless you want to get hurt," Carson looked at her almost sternly.

"No ow," she gasped.

"So Miss Lily, do you promise me you will never go downstairs again?" he asked. "Unless you are with your Mama or Papa or much older." Lily hesitated before nodding. "Good."

"Lalou Car," Lily giggled and pressed her lips to his cheek.

"Now let's get you back to bed," Carson nodded walking back into the room and placing her in the crib. "It's too early for such a young lady to be up."

"Bye Car," she waved.

"I shall see you later Miss Lily," he nodded politely and left the room, his chest bursting with love for the little girl that reminded him so much like her mother, it scared him. He knew he would always have a place in his heart for Lily, right next to the place in his heart for Mary.

* * *

William Crawley woke up to the strangest thing, someone was patting his face. He opened his eyes and was shocked to see his baby sister looking up at his, her little hand still patting his cheek.

"Will, up! Will, up!" she giggled.

"Lily," he hissed, the eight year old suddenly fully alert, sitting up in bed. With delight Lily squealed and tried to pull herself onto his bed.

"Up!" she begged. With a sigh of resignation he let her climb onto his bed.

"What are you doing out of the nursery?" he asked.

"Me climb," she said. "Me good climb. Visit Will!"

"Well it is seven o'clock," he sighed but he had no idea how the little girl managed to get into his room. "Did Mrs. Jensen already wake up?" From his days in the nursery, he knew the older woman was not fond of waking up until she truly had to in order to get Lily breakfast.

"Sleep," she shook her head and tried to climb on his lap. "Play! I want play!" Immediately she puckered her bottom lip and he could hardly resist his baby sister.

"I'm tired Lily, why don't we snuggle instead," he suggested and her brown eyes sparkled with excitement as she hugged him tightly. He really was tired because he honestly wasn't fond of waking up until he truly had to either.

"Lalou Will," Lily sighed contently.

"I love you too Lily, now let's sleep," he mumbled.

"No sleep," she shook her head.

"But quiet," William reaffirmed. He was going to be mad if she made him tired for the day his grandfather had planned for him. Excused from his studies once a week, his grandfather would take him on a destination that revolved something around the estate while it could be anything from visiting the cottages or learning to shoot. While his father spent his time reaffirming William's upbringing education wise, he enjoyed his time every week set aside to what didn't seem like work quite yet for the eight year old.

He was the heir to Downton, this house was to be his one day, he looked sadly down at his little sister though. She was not only a girl, but the youngest, she wouldn't inherit a thing. Miss Emily, his governess, told him not to fret over such things. It would be her job one day to make her suitable for a husband who would hopefully give her something worthwhile.

Just as William started to drift back off to sleep, Lily started to shift in the bed, he knew her wanting to snuggle wouldn't last long, she wasn't even two years old, he should have expected it. Knowing now he would never get back to sleep he sat up in bed.

"Lily!" he heard a frantic voice in the hall, it was Mrs. Jensen. "Lady Mary! Mr. Crawley!" She sounded panicked and William jumped off the bed, telling Lily to stay put, and poked his head out of the door and found her running across the upstairs.

"It's alright Mrs. Jensen, Lily is in here," he said.

"Master William I am shocked that you of all people would take her out of the nursery without alerting me," she chastised. "Lily Crawley, get over here at once, I've been in a panic."

"But I didn't ta-"

"I have to get her breakfast and I suggest you do the same," she looked down at the young boy she used to be in charge of with a frown before scurrying into his bedroom, snatching Lily of the bed, and carrying her back to the nursery while she wailed. The last thing William saw was her brown eyes dark with anger, looking right at Mrs. Jensen.

"William my boy," Matthew said, emerging from his dressing room. "It's not like you to be up this early." Rather than get scolded again, he lied.

"I just thought perhaps I could do everything like Grandpapa today, even eat breakfast downstairs," he said hopefully. He could kill two birds with one stone.

"You know of course I don't mind, but I suggest you say it like that exactly to your grandfather when he asks what you are doing down there," Matthew said. "Get dressed and I guess I shall see you downstairs." William looked at his father in shock, today, other than being woken up unceremoniously by Lily, was going to be even better than he expected.

* * *

"Can you ring Carson for some tea?" Mary asked Matthew as they settled into the library for the day with Lily.

"Mama," she cried, beckoning her mother over to where she had blocks laid out. "Build."

"Lily darling, what has Mama taught you about manners, you cannot go around ordering people about," Mary informed her daughter before settling on the floor beside her.

"Build _please_," Lily huffed. "With me."

"I wonder where she gets her demanding nature from," Matthew chuckled as he sat in a chair, opening a newspaper.

"Are you aware of what Papa is doing with William today?" Mary asked, ignoring his previous comment with an eye roll.

"I haven't the faintest idea," he shook his head. "But knowing your father he will come back exhausted." Mary carefully stacked a block on another one and watched as Lily tried to mimic her.

"Mama good," Lily said. "Mama better than me."

"Was that almost a full sentence?" Matthew lifted his head from the paper.

"You tell me, apparently I'm demanding," Mary scowled. "You will be as good at stacking as Mama one day my dear girl."

"Pretty? Pretty as Mama?" Lily smiled a toothy grin at Mary. Tears pricked Mary's eyes as she lifted her onto her lap.

"You are beautiful Lily, you will be such a gorgeous lady one day," Mary pressed a kiss to the curls on top of her head.

"Lady, lady, lady, lady," Lily sang and wiggled out of Mary's grasp and ignored the blocks for a moment. She started to spin in circles until she bumped into Matthew's legs. "Papa!"

"You are a very silly little girl," Matthew chuckled, bending down to cup her cheek. "Do you want to sit with Papa?"

"No!" she shook her head. "Play!" Matthew put his paper down and looked seriously at her causing her to giggle.

"No, are you saying no to your Papa." Lily threw him a look that said, _If you think I would chose to sit still rather than play you are sadly mistaken_.

"YES!" Mary raised her eyebrow at him as he smirked devilishly.

"Then I might just have to do this," Matthew laughed as he reached out for her. Lily squealed and tried to run away but Matthew quickly snatched her and sat down on the chair with her. She tried to get down but let out a laugh as Matthew began to tickle her unmercifully.

"Papa, Papa no!" she giggled.

"There's that word no again," Matthew teased.

"Careful," Mary warned as Lily wiggled out of his grasp and stood upright on his legs, her tiny hands grasping his shirt.

"Lalou Papa," she puckered her lips and Matthew met them. She cuddled with him for about two minutes as Alfred brought the tea tray in, until she got bored.

Mary had continued to stack blocks on each other absentmindedly while watching her husband and daughter fondly. So absentlmindley she gasped as Lily got down from the chair started to turn again, crashing directly into the tower Mary constructed. Immediately the baby started to cry. "Down," she whimpered.

"Oh my darling-" Mary reached out for her but Lily pushed her away.

"Build," she cried and pointed at the blocks.

"Excuse me… build what?" Mary asked narrowing her eyes at her daughter. Lily looked unrelenting.

"BUILD!" she screamed.

"Lily Isobel Crawley," Matthew snapped. "You do not yell." Lily stomped her foot. This was an often occurrence, she could be sweet as can be one second and throwing a tantrum the next. Matthew often wondered if Mary was exactly the same at this age.

"I think someone is in desperate need for a nap," Mary commented.

"No nap!" Mary closed her eyes and sighed desperately.

"Yes nap!" Mary reaffirmed.

"No!" Lily hissed.

"Yes," Matthew intervened, placing his paper down which he had tried to begin to read again, and scooping his full-on tantrum daughter in his arms. Immediately she began to sob and he could tell she was very tired, though he honestly had no idea why. She had only just had lunch and her nap was usually not due for another two hours, but it seemed like a good time to him. "You drink your tea, I'll get this one down. It'll help buck you up for what with most likely be tantrum part two in two hours."

"Of course," Mary said dryly, cleaning up the blocks quickly, rising to her feet to choose where she wanted to sit. Her heart clenched though as she heard Lily's sobs echoing down the hallway, Matthew returning a long time later looking disheveled and a large tear stain on his shirt.

"Well that went over well," he sighed.

"Did you expect it to Matthew?" Mary almost smirked. "Honestly it's like you don't know her at all. How did you get her down?"

"I didn't," Matthew mumbled.

"What?" Mary gasped.

"I put a few more stuffed animals in her crib and told her she must play there until she falls asleep, she was still crying but after twenty minutes of rocking I was getting sea sick," Matthew collapsed next to her. "Mrs. Jensen said that it was a good idea and went to clean up the day room after Lily's morning of destruction."

"I'm going to-" Mary began to get up but Matthew grabbed her hand and held her back.

"We mustn't indulge her, she is getting older, she needs to learn this behavior is not acceptable," Matthew told her.

"I suppose your right," Mary sighed.

"Mama! Papa!" they heard William call, running into the house. He emerged in the room as soon as she rang to clear her tea.

"My goodness what on earth did Papa do with him," Mary gasped at the sight of her rather muddy son.

"Grandpapa let me ride Sybbie's horse and now I might get one of my own!" William said excitedly.

"It was only a matter of time before the boys joined in on the phenomena that is this families obsessions with all things horses I suppose," Mary rolled her eyes.

"He was telling me about the hunt and-" he broke off seeing Carson come into the room to collect the tea tray.

"Carson you shouldn't be doing that," Matthew shook his head. "That's what footman are for."

"I wanted to speak with you sir," Carson said. "About Miss Lily. I'm afraid early this morning she managed to escape the nursery somehow and make it to the servant's hall. While Mrs. Hughes and I found it very amusing I do not believe it is very safe."

"It certainly is not!" Mary gasped. "How on earth did she escape the nursery?"

"She did twice Mama," William spoke up. "She's the one who woke me up; I just assumed she was crying and someone who shouldn't have let her out."

"Carson?" Mary prompted.

"I've asked the staff as it has been concerning me all day and none of them have neither done it nor seen anyone today milady," Carson informed her.

"Thank you for telling us," Matthew nodded. "We will get to the bottom of it."

"Of course sir," Carson nodded.

"We should ask Bertie," Mary decided and got up to walk upstairs.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you Papa," William mumbled. "I was scolded earlier today by Mrs. Jensen who thought I took her out of the nursery but I didn't."

"You told us now, that's all that matters," Matthew ruffled his hair and William scowled. "Don't look at me like that; I am still your Papa. Now let's follow your Mama before she gets too far ahead of us." William nodded and followed his parents upstairs. Immediately as they passed the nursery they heard Lily and Mary was standing outside of it.

"Does that sound like she's tired herself out Matthew?" Mary hissed.

"Mama," they heard her whimper piteously as if she had been crying for them since Matthew left. "Papa." Mary put her hand on the door to open it fully but stopped. From the crack in the doorway she saw Lily sitting up in her crib looking indecisive.

"Matthew," Mary beckoned him.

"What?" he questioned.

"Look." Mary stifled a gasp of horror, her hand over her mouth, as they watched her little escape artistry. Slowly she threw out her favorite dog again after kissing it. Then she proceeded to stack the rest of the stuffed animals in a pile before climbing to the top and standing up. This time it reached the top.

"Yay Lily," she congratulated herself and Matthew would have laughed if he wasn't so terrified Lily would get hurt. As she swung her leg over and Mary realized it was actually working she flew into the room.

"NO LILY!" she cried and grabbed her daughter.

"Mama I do," Lily whined.

"No," she shook her head. "You do not do that; you could get very very hurt."

"No hurt," Lily smiled as if she thought her mother should be proud. In a way, Mary was, but she wouldn't let her know it.

"You cannot do that Lily," Mary reaffirmed, getting into her daughter's face to get the point across. "No! You know the meaning of the word no, correct?" Lily sighed and nodded. "Mama and Papa both say you cannot do that again!" Mary felt almost bad for scolding her daughter this harshly, but she did not want Lily to get hurt. Lily turned her head around and found her Papa; she stuck her bottom lip out and looked up at him with her big brown eyes filled with tears Matthew's heart melted on the spot. He had similar sentiments to Mary's, he was more concerned with his daughter's safety than making her upset at him.

"I say no too Lily," he told her, coming to Mary's side. "You could get very hurt and I don't want that."

"I do," she whispered. "I go to Car and to Will."

"And what did Carson say when you went downstairs?" Matthew prompted.

"Car say no ow!" she nodded, resigned.

"If you ever got hurt Lily I don't know what I would do," Mary buried her face in the baby's hair. Sure she had already gotten bumps and scrapes but she did not want to imagine her daughter seriously hurt.

"No hurt Mama, no do," she shook her head, wiggling around to face her mother again. Lily cupped her Mama's cheek. "Lily good."

"Yes," Mary smiled through the tears that began to run down her face. "Lily is very very good, now are you going to take a nap like a good girl and wait for Mama, Papa, or Mrs. Jensen to get you out of your crib?" Lily tried to understand all the words, she didn't, be she realized it meant no more getting down by herself.

"Story?" she asked hopefully.

"Yes, Mama will rock you back to sleep, and Papa can tell a story," Mary looked at Matthew before settling down in the rocking chair, Lily curled into her chest.

"Lalou Mama, Lalou Papa," Lily mumbled, sleepily.

"I love you too Lily girl, so very much," Mary held her close. Before Matthew even sat down next to her with a book in his hand, Lily was fast asleep, one hand resting on her mother's chest, the other finding a stray curl in her mother's hair a grasping it tightly. Matthew smirked.

"It seems her adventurous morning and afternoon has tired her out."

"Oh god I can't believe she did that," Mary breathed. "How many other times has she? William or Bertie never did that."

"It just goes to show something," Matthew added.

"And what is that?" Mary looked up at him.

"She's going to have us wrapped around her little finger for the rest of her life," Matthew smiled widely.

"And how do you figure that?" she questioned.

"You were scolding her, and now she's asleep and it doesn't look like you want to move, which is exactly what she wanted. She'd prefer to sleep in your arms than the crib any day," he commented.

"I don't care," Mary shook her head. "As long as she is safe I'd hold her forever."

* * *

_My parents told me I did this as a child, needless to say they never put stuffed animals in my crib again (: Thought it would be cute to give Lily a moment with Carson, William, and more with Mary/Matthew. Now... next chapter with begin, sort of kind of, the story (still not entirely, but I guess of "life" of Lily)._

_Let me know what moments of her life you want to see, she shall be older than a baby by next chapter._

_Please review, even if it is one line long, i just want confirmation that people are reading AND enjoying the story. Thank you (:_


	8. Chapter 8

_Life of a Lily Chapter 8_

_Okay so I've gotten through what I wanted to do in terms of Lily's relationship with the members of the family I felt either important or just thought it would be a cute moment. This story is mostly about the life of Lily Crawley (as if you couldn't tell by the title haha!) and her relationships with her brothers, parents, grandparents, cousins, etc. _

_The rest of this story is going to be focused on her growing up in Downton and the trials and tribulations that happen on the way (because as has been said, Matthew and Mary are cursed so of course their daughter, whom they tried so hard to have, would have a more difficult life). You can assume every chapter that does not start out with an announcement of her age continues on in the age that came from the previous chapter. Eventually, these sections will get longer and longer as the story goes on…_

_I don't really have a direct focus of what events I want to put in this story, only that there is one storyline that I will get to eventually (and all of the chapters that include my original ideas, including this one, will have something to do with that storyline in some big or small way, so you have tiny tiny clues!), so if you have any suggestions please that me know, I would be very open to them (and maybe I could even connect them to my big storyline)!_

_Sorry to ramble, here is the next chapter! We are now out of the 20s and into the 1930s now! (I am aware that this is during the Great Depression but I am having it like Matthew's ideas saved Downton and protected it from ruin, even the recession)_

* * *

_3 years old…_

Gratefully Matthew collapsed beside his wife, their sweaty bodies moving to embrace one another for the first time in what seemed like forever.

"I love you," Mary gasped.

"I love you too," Matthew murmured into her hair.

"You'd think we'd get to do this more often," Mary chuckled into his chest, her fingers gently running over his shoulder and nuzzling into his neck, pressing delicate kisses to him. Matthew groaned.

"We have a toddler in the house," he sighed. "Who enjoys ditching poor Mrs. Jensen in the mornings and snuggling with her Mama and Papa. And boys who would know what we were doing."

"It's a poor habit you know Matthew, we should try and get her to stop," Mary's fingers now danced over his chest and moved lower. Matthew bit his lip, if she was going to talk so seriously and do this to him, two could play at that game.

"I don't know," he sighed, pressing a kiss behind her ear, his hand gently brushing over her hip. "If it keeps her Papa's little girl, I'd let her sleep in bed with us all night."

"But when would we ever have time for this," Mary giggled and rolled completely on top of him to press a kiss to his lips. Matthew groaned louder this time, deepening the kiss quickly.

"My stamina is no longer up to par with before we had children," Matthew hissed. "We must wait."

"Who knows when we will get to do this again?" Mary sighed contently, resolving to stay on top of him, but simply lay her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

"True," Matthew smirked as Mary closed her eyes. He allowed himself to catch his breath for a minute, relishing in the intimate time they were sharing. Before she realized what was happening, Matthew grasped her shoulders and flipped her over, so he was on top again.

"What happened to your poor stamina," she smirked, her brown eyes sparkling with amusement.

"It realized that I have a beautiful wife who is asking for me," he leaned down to kiss her neck, and then lower, eliciting a gasp from Mary. "And I'd be a fool to pass it up."

Tonight was a rare occurrence, usually when they made love they locked the door, then made sure they at least were partially dressed and unlocked it so in the morning, Lily, if she decided she wanted to snuggle that morning, could come into bed with them. Instead, they were so exhausted they fell asleep in each other's naked embrace, blissfully happy.

That was until about two hours later.

"Mama," they heard a cry and a knock on the other side of the door. "Papa. The door is locked." Matthew's eyes snapped open and he shook Mary awake.

"Matthew the sun is not even up yet," she mumbled, burrowing further into the covers.

"Lily's awake," he hissed.

"Mama," it sounded like she was choking back a sob. "Papa." Lily was usually cheery when she wanted to snuggle, and about six hours later. Mary jumped up with a gasp.

"It is alright Lily, we will be right there," she called and grabbed her dressing gown, and tied it tightly around her. Matthew put his pajama pants on and unlocked the door. On the other side, he observed his three year old was clearly not herself.

Usually her eyes were bright and hopeful that he would pick her up and hug her to his chest. Today, they looked up at him tiredly, full of tears. Her face was pale, and her long hair sticky to her sweaty face.

"Lily," he gasped. "My darling girl did you have a nightmare." She shook her head and started to cry again. Mary's head snapped up in alarm, Lily was like her, the older she got, the more quickly she got out of the crying phase. She didn't even reach up for him to pick her up, but Matthew knew what he was to feel as he held her to his bare chest. "Good God."

"What?" Mary rushed over and immediately felt her head. "Matthew, she is burning up!"

"Mama," she cried.

"Oh my darling girl, it is okay," Mary brushed her hair out of her face. Lily had been a fairly healthy child most of her short life, Mary honestly couldn't remember the last time she had a fever bad enough for her to come crying to them. "Mama and Papa have you now." Matthew sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her closer, Lily curling around him and crying pitifully into his chest.

"She's really hot," Matthew choked back. "I've never felt someone have this high of a fever."

"We must ring Clarkson," Mary said.

"We mustn't wake him," Matthew shook his head. "We've dealt with fevers before."

"Never of this caliber," she hissed. She noticed her daughter had suddenly become very green and snatched her out of Matthew's arms, before he could even protest the sound of her retching began. Luckily there was a few dry heaves before Mary had managed to get her over to the wash basin, throwing up what little she had in her stomach.

"Mama," she cried between throwing up.

"My girl it will be fine, it will be alright, Mama's got you," Mary rubbed her back gently. "Matthew, get a cool rag, we need to bring her fever down." Matthew did so immediately, placing it on the back of his baby girl's neck as she continued to retch for another minute before all but collapsing in Mary's arms. Too exhausted to even cry.

"Perhaps you're right about Clarkson," Matthew murmured.

"No," she shook her head as Lily laid her head on Mary's lap. She stroked her hair gently. "You are right. We'll call him in the morning and send the motor over, that is if she does not get better. It might just be the bug Bertie had last week."

"If you are sure," Matthew sighed.

"Darling, what else is the matter?" Mary asked as Lily finally looked up at her sadly.

"My throat," she croaked.

"See," Mary said. "Bertie had a sore throat last week, she's young, and she must just have it worse than he."

"For someone who was panicking a second ago, you gained your composure quickly," Matthew tried to joke. Mary smiled up at him sadly.

"Do you want to go to sleep in Mama and Papa's bed my darling?" Mary suggested. Lily nodded and reached her arms up and Mary gathered her in her arms and brought her to their bed. Matthew got another cool rag and laid it on her head as she settled her head on Mary's chest. Matthew rubbed her back while Mary hummed softly in her ear until their daughter's soft snores filled the room.

"My poor girl," Matthew murmured.

"I'm sure she'll be fine," Mary smiled sadly. "She is my daughter after all." Fatigue hitting them both, Mary wrapped both her arms around Lily and pushed her face into her long curly hair, breathing a deep sigh, before falling asleep. Matthew continued to look at them for several minutes, marveling how alike they both were, before joining them.

They were woken up three hours later, Lily vomiting all over herself and Mary. Immediately Lily began to sob.

"No, shhh, no it's alright," Mary immediately shushed. "Mama will get changed and Papa will get you changed and I'll meet you in your room, okay?" Lily nodded but continued to cry as Matthew slipped on his shirt and picked her up, worrying slightly more about his daughter and wishing they had called Clarkson when Lily first came to them. As her skin touched his Matthew bit his lip, she was significantly warmer than earlier.

Mrs. Jensen jumped straight up to Lily's sobs as Matthew entered the room.

"Mr. Crawley," she gasped. "Lily- I-"

"It's alright," he said. "I don't blame you; we all know how adept Lily is to escaping this room."

"What's wrong?" Mrs. Jensen asked.

"She has a fever," Matthew said, setting Lily down on her bed and stripping her of her nightgown. "Here, could you please dispose of this." Mrs. Jensen grabbed it as Matthew turned to find another nightgown for her to where. Meanwhile, Lily had lain down on her bed, her back to the door. Matthew heard Mary come in but didn't turn around.

"Matthew," she croaked, as words failed her suddenly. "Matthew." It still came out in a whisper, her voice shaking. "MATTHEW!" her voice gained sudden ferocity as the last Matthew was screeched out. She must have woken the entire house because as Matthew whipped around she heard quick footsteps running down the hallway. Matthew froze at what his wife was looking at.

Lily's back was covered in a red, angry looking, rash.

"Dear god," he choked as Robert and Cora rushed in, Tom a few seconds behind.

"Wha-" Mary let out a sob that cut Robert off and Matthew whirled around to face him.

"Someone get Clarkson," he hissed. "NOW!"

"Mama, what is it?" William came running. Cora, shocked and grief stricken immediately held her grandson back. They couldn't come in contact with Lily, none of them could, for they all knew what she had and they just needed conformation.

"No," Mary finally managed to whisper.

* * *

Mary couldn't believe her eyes as she watched Dr. Clarkson, with a mask on, leaning over her daughter. Checking her pulse, checking her heart, observing the rash at a careful distance. Lily was too tired to protest, but the fear in her drooping eyes made Mary want to run towards her and hold her. Finally Dr. Clarkson nodded and motioned for them to follow him outside.

"Just say it," Mary croaked. "It was in the village, I know. She has it doesn't she."

"Yes Lady Mary," Dr. Clarkson nodded. "All signs do point that Miss Lily does indeed have Scarlet fever." The words now said aloud, Mary sobbed and Matthew immediately grabbed her in his arms and tried to console her; it was in vain, he could not form a single word being as equally distraught himself.

"What about Sybbie, William, and Bertie," Tom spoke up.

"I must check them as well, but I suggest they move out of here, tonight, and into Crawley House," Dr. Clarkson said. "Her room needs to be sterilized, no one can go in or out except me."

"And me," Mary announced.

"Lady Mary, I'm afraid you cannot, not while she is contagious," Dr. Clarkson shook his head. "I'd send her to an infectious disease hospital if not for the availability to quarantine this room. And how I'd know Lord Grantham or you for that matter would never allow it."

"She threw up on me this morning," Mary's voice was devoid of all emotion. "I'm as much of a risk to everyone else, I must stay with her. She mustn't be alone; I _WON'T_ let my baby girl be alone."

"Mary, be reasonable," Cora whispered.

"No Mama, Lily needs me, she's scared and she's… she's…"

"There has been a significant drop in…" Dr. Clarkson measured his words carefully and decided not to go that way. "There has been success, with the new serum; I intend to inject it to her once I return from checking the other children."

"She hates needles," Mary whispered.

"I'm afraid I have no choice, and that she might not even be conscious for it," Dr. Clarkson said. "I do not believe I can stop you from staying with her Lady Mary, so on that note, I urge you to be careful who else you come in contact with after your daughter. I shall be back." He followed Robert to where Cora had shepherded the rest of the children.

"Mary," Matthew said hoarsely.

"I'm staying with her," Mary whispered. "There is nothing you can say or do that will stop me Matthew."

"But what about Bertie and William," Matthew choked out. "What about me?" Mary sighed, tears leaking out of her eyes, and turned to him. She placed a hand on his chest.

"I'll wear a mask," she murmured. "But I can't let her be alone, I just can't. Not when she could-"

"And I wouldn't want her to be, but Mary it's so dangerous," Matthew shook his head.

"She is worth it, is she not?" Mary's voice cracked. "_But what about you, I can't lose you too."_ Was what he wanted to say; but the truth in the matter was, Lily was worth it. He would take her place if he had the choice. If Lily had thrown up on him he'd offer the same thing as Mary was for his daughter, he'd offer his life.

"Tell her," Matthew tried to hide his tears. He couldn't fall apart now that Mary was being so strong. "Tell her that Papa loves her very much."

"You will tell her yourself in a few weeks," she said strongly. "But I will." Matthew hugged Mary tightly again, it all felt surreal. Yesterday, the family had gone to luncheon with Isobel, Lily had played outside for hours giggling, laughing, carefree, and full of energy. As she usually was, as she always was. And now she was lying in bed, sick, maybe even dying.

That's when he remembered, they had walked there, Lily running ahead, playing with some of the younger children in the village for a brief moment, but it only took a brief moment for it to spread. A village child's ball had landed over the fence in Crawley House's garden; Lily had picked it up and given it back. She hovered at the gate for a moment, chatting about whatever three year olds could.

"Dr. Clarkson," Matthew said his voice hard as the doctor returned.

"Yes Mr. Crawley," Dr. Clarkson nodded.

"The village children who had it, did they live?" Matthew asked. Dr. Clarkson deeply considered his answer before speaking up.

"One of them did," he sighed and Matthew shut his eyes tightly.

"Mary, where shall you sleep?" Matthew asked.

"In Mrs. Jensen's bed, I think she should go to Crawley house to help Miss Emily will the children, they will be in such a state," Mary fretted. "Let William and Bertie know that I love them very much." Matthew's jaw tightened.

"Tell them yourself if a few weeks," he repeated the same words his wife had said to him.

"Oh Matthew," Mary cried, throwing her arms around him brief, kissing his cheek, and separating. Matthew cupped his wife's cheek gently.

"Take care of our girl," he nodded.

"Take care of our boys and I'll see you when I see you," Mary smiled at him before nodding at Dr. Clarkson and entering the room.

* * *

The chills that wracked her child's body were unbearable to even watch, no matter how many blankets were piled on top of her. Mary sat and held her hand while she watched Dr. Clarkson and a nurse remove every piece of clothing Lily had come in contact with the past week, her stuffed animals were gone, her original bedding gone. The room was stripped and bare; it no longer looked like the nursery. Mary's heart broke thinking of how, if she was not delirious, Lily would be crying for her beloved stuffed dog 'Red' that she named after her favorite color that was now in a bag, ready to be burned.

"Mama," Lily croaked. "My throat."

"I know my darling, I know it hurts," Mary rubbed her hand up and down her daughter's sweaty arm, surprised she was even able to form words.

"Swallow," Lily gasped and she watched as her little chest heaved for air.

"Dr. Clarkson," Mary cried as she watched her daughter struggle, her tears had long since been completely dried out, she was sure if she ever slept a wink, they would return. He rushed over a placed a hand on her chest.

"It's alright, just breathe," he calmed. "Don't swallow just breathe, I know it feels scary but it's okay."

"Come on my darling girl," Mary crooned. "In, out, in, out." She relaxed visibly as Lily's chest began to move in synchronization with the words she would saying. "In, out, in, out."

"Her fever has riven," Dr. Clarkson noted, feeling her head, noting her cheek was now covered in a rash. As Lily breathed harshly, the red enflamed tongue was bright as day, if there was any doubt she had scarlet fever it was confirmed now.

"My poor girl," Mary pursed her lips, wishing she could press her lips to Lily's cheek, her hand, anything that could help comfort her.

"These next few hours, these next few days, will tell," Dr. Clarkson nodded. "If she survives them, she'll live."

"She will," Mary whispered. "Because she is my baby girl and always will be my baby girl."

* * *

_I did as much research as I could on scarlet fever in the beginning of the 1900s and since penicillin wasn't yet created there was still a significant mortality rate, so I truly hope this is not overdramatic for something that isn't as fatal as it used to (and hardly is now)._

_Please, please review. It lets me know if people enjoy the story and if I should continue writing. Just drop a line, it does not have to be a novel, a simple "Like it" will suffice. Even if it is constructive criticism I would appreciate it (although telling me this story sucks would not be appreciated, I deleted the review very promptly after I received one that said that, it's called constructive criticism for a reason—tell me what I can improve on to make this story better. If you don't have something nice to say, and in my opinion telling me what I can do to improve is nice, please do not say it at all.)_

_Okay, now that I've succeeded in sufficiently rambling in this chapter, I will let you all continue with your day haha!_


	9. Chapter 9

_Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey_

_I don't know if an A/N is really necessary, this chapter is self explanatory! I promise you won't hate me too much ;)_

* * *

"Thank god they are ok," Matthew heard his mother breathe and he immediately walked into the sitting room hopefully.

"Who are you talking to?" he asked wearily.

"Edith dear," Isobel said softly. "The doctor has been to see Elizabeth and Theodore seeing as they have visited just the other day. He will follow up but it seems as though they have no symptoms." Matthew nodded and collapsed on a chair.

"Oh," he managed to mutter and put his face in his hands.

"Our Lily is strong," Isobel said fervently, grabbing her sons hands almost harshly. "Do not give up. Do not give up on her." Matthew's head snapped up.

"Do you think that is what I am doing? Giving up on her," he whispered. "I'd never give up, I'd fight for her, hope for her, and I'd give up MY life for her."

"Papa," he heard Bertie call. The eight year old came out from behind the door.

"Bertie," Matthew sighed. "What are you doing awake?" Although he spent some part of his days at Downton, he spent his nights at Crawley house. It did not feel right, sleeping in bed without Mary in their own bed, fully aware of where she was and why.

"Is Lily going to die," Bertie asked.

"Why on earth would you say that?" Isobel bit her lip.

"I heard one of the village people saying it yesterday, when we were outside," Bertie informed him. "Everyone knows Lily has scarlet fever and one of them just said it is a shame that she's going to die. William told me not to believe them but-"

"And he was right to," Matthew nodded. "Lily is not leaving us yet."

"Yet," Bertie gulped. "But she still could."

"Pray for her my boy," Matthew sighed. "Your Mama and Dr. Clarkson are taking very good care of her, now we must do our part and pray."

"But I never got to say goodbye," Bertie choked out. Matthew sighed and got to his feet to embrace his son.

"And you promptly will never have to," Matthew gulped. "Now go to bed son."

"Do you have a picture of her?" he asked. "I promise I'll give it back but, I want something to pray over." Matthew nodded and had his son follow him up to his old room. There were two guest rooms, the first had been used by Sybil the first few days until Tom used this as a sign that Sybil was much older now, and it was time for them to move into the agent's house. Tom did not choose his timing wisely, because now Mary and Matthew would have to find a tutor for the boys at a very short notice, but at the moment no one in the family felt like learning, or for Matthew, even breathing.

On his fireplace sat the picture. It had been taken recently and was not necessarily traditional. Although Lily was wearing a dress, bought by Cora, instead of a stoic expression they usually tried to make children have, Lily could not stop giggling that day. It had been her birthday and almost every photo they had gotten was blurry because she was moving so much. So when Mary and Matthew eventually got the picture, her curly haired was framed around her beautiful face that was so wide in a smile neither of them had the heart to get another taken. It was so Lily.

Would it be the last picture ever taken of her?

"Here son," Matthew said. "I'll come in and get it after you are asleep."

"Thank you Papa," Bertie smiled sadly before leaving and walking down the short hallway to the guest bedroom. Matthew followed much more slowly so Bertie wouldn't know he did so.

"Lord," he heard Bertie say. "Are you there? Because, my baby sister is very sick and I love her very much. I'm sorry for stealing William's watch the other day and please don't hold that against me when I ask you this," Bertie gulped. "Please help Lily live. Our family needs her and she needs us. So please…" If he said anymore Matthew didn't know, overwhelming sobs began to wrack his body and he snapped his hand over his mouth.

"Matthew," Isobel sighed, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh Mother," Matthew cried and turned around to her embrace, crying on her shoulder.

* * *

"Shhh, shhh, it's okay," Mary whispered as she all but held her daughter up over the edge of her bed as she vomited into a basin. Dr. Clarkson watched Lady Mary with careful eyes. It was so like during the Great War when she rose to the challenge of becoming a volunteer to help with Matthew, and he watched as she demonstrated her skills as a mother though seldom in the village believe she would be a very good one. "Mama's here, Mama won't let anything happen to you my darling." Lily's body finally collapsed from fatigue and Mary laid her back on the bed.

"Mama," slipped past Lily's dry, cracked lips, but nothing more. Gently Mary stroked her cheek and forehead, her fingers feeling just how hot her head still was. It was only three days, but it felt like three weeks.

Gently Mary dabbed a cloth on the edge of the child's mouth to wipe off the sick that was still there and Lily's lips trembled against it before going still. Her whole body still. Mary allowed herself to lose composure for a second, wiped away a tear, before she straightened up, grabbing several cool towels and placing them on Lily's forehead and arms.

"Lady Mary, may I have a word," Clarkson said, and now got a full look of her appearance. Exhaustion radiated from her like waves. Her own cheeks were flushed, her eyes dull and surrounded by circles, she hadn't slept in days. With concern, he felt her pulse.

"It's Lily who is ill not me," she hissed. "What is it?"

"I just wanted to inform you that on the test I did earlier, when you were sleeping, on the chair I might add," his eyes were full of disapproval. "Her lungs sounded considerably clear."

"So she doesn't have pneumonia yet," Mary breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank heavens."

"Scarlet fever is not that cut and dry, she is not out of the woods yet," he reminded her.

"But it's a start," she sighed. "I'm going to ring Matthew tomorrow, I'm afraid I have been worrying him with my lack of communication. Some good news is better than no news at all to give him." She looked at Dr. Clarkson who looked down worriedly. "What is it?"

"I must go back to the village, many more children have begun to fall ill to it," Dr. Clarkson said.

"I'll be fine here," Mary said. "And so will Lily."

"You have become quite the nurse," he commented.

"I had to be, for the sake of my child I had to be," Mary told him confidently. "Now go, no other children should have to suffer because we are keeping you." Dr. Clarkson tipped his head to her, opening the door just as Anna was outside of it.

"Milady," she gasped in surprise. In her hands sat a tray of food. "We've made up a tray for dinner. Mrs. Patmore added some broth for Miss Lily, to see if she will try and have some."

"Thank you Anna, so very much," Mary smiled behind her mask, but Anna knew it was there. "Thank Mrs. Patmore for me as well."

"It is no trouble milady," Anna smiled back sadly. "We all want to see Miss Lily well."

"I know you do," Mary's eyes welled up with tears. "And that's what makes me so appreciative. My daughter seems to be more popular downstairs at three years old than I ever was."

"We're all praying for _both_ of you milady," Anna told her.

"I cannot promise I will eat much," Mary informed her. "But it's very much appreciated. Now please go, we all may not catch it as easily as children but if anyone else falls ill in this house I will never forgive myself."

"Try to eat some," Anna emphasized, curtsied, and left the hall. Mary shut the door tightly behind her and turned to Lily who's eyes were still closed but Mary knew she was in too much pain from her throat and fever to sleep.

"Darling," she whispered, taking off the cloth's she previous laid on her. "Look what Mama has?" Lily didn't open her eyes. "Broth, do you think you can try and have some for me. I know you can't swallow well, but there is also water. Do you want to try that?" No response.

As careful as she could Mary brought her up to a sitting position and shook her gently.

"Lily please open your beautiful eyes for Mama," she practically begged and thankfully Lily did so.

"No," she whispered, shaking her head at the broth that was now in Mary's hand.

"Try for me sweet girl, please," Mary said. "It will feel good on your throat." A spoonful was brought to her lips and Lily opened her mouth timidly. She tried to swallow but she cried out in pain, spitting the contents in her mouth onto her nightgown and bed. "It's okay, it's okay. Try a little more darling please."

"No," she whimpered.

"Just swallow very slowly, tiny sips," Mary soothed. The look Lily gave her broke Mary's heart, but she was insistent. This time there was hardly any broth on the spoon and it went down Lily's throat with ease. "There, see that was not so bad." Mary managed to get two more spoonful's down before Lily refused.

"Papa?" Lily suddenly said and Mary gulped. Her fever had been so high the past few days that Lily had barely noted her father's absence. Today was her most conscious day and there was one man missing.

"Lily, Papa cannot be here right now."

"Does h-he not… love m-me any-"

"No," Mary said almost harshly. "He loves you very much Lily, it's just… only one of us can stay with you while you're sick." Lily closed her eyes. "And I know it's scary darling but he loves you so much and he wants to be here." She saw how her words were comforting. "William, Bertie, Grandmama, Grandpapa, Gran, everyone loves you very much and they can't wait to see you." Mary's voice dropped to a whisper. "You've survived this long Lily, you must fight, please keep fighting baby girl. Please." Lily was asleep, and now with her finally relaxed Mary lifted the nightgown off of her in order to clean her up.

Mary wanted to close her eyes as she looked at the telltale rash of the disease; particularly under her armpits, her neck, and the back of her legs. She looked so small bathed in red; it was so ironic because that was her favorite color. She felt Lily's head; it felt the same as before, which wasn't good.

She turned to another nightgown; she had asked her mother yesterday to buy more, because they were going through them quickly throughout the day as she threw up or dirtied them.

"You are my baby girl," Mary cried. "And I love you so much." A chill ran through Lily and Mary piled more blankets on top of her before disposing of her nightgown and looking at her tray. It was sandwiches but that was all Mary could stomach, it was so hard, so hard to watch her baby girl suffer.

* * *

"The sweetest little girl under this roof should not be suffering like this," Mrs. Hughes shook her head.

"I've sent up some broth, perhaps she'll try some," Mrs. Patmore mentioned.

"Mr. Barrow, you are rather quiet," Bates pointed out. Thomas was sitting down, staring into space.

"Well I don't want her to die, do I?" Thomas scowled. "Unless you're trying to say something."

"None of us want her to die," Mrs. Hughes snapped. Anna had tears in her eyes when she made it back down to the servant's hall.

"What's happened?" Daisy questioned, walking in.

"Miss Lily does not look well," Anna shook her head. "And Lady Mary is exhausting herself. She hasn't left that room since she took ill."

"Are you thinking the worst?" Mrs. Patmore spoke up.

"Lady Mary's not about to give up on her," Anna commented.

"I'm not afraid to admit Lady Mary is not my favorite person under this roof, but her daughter is exactly like her," Mrs. Hughes reassured the servant's hall. "Don't count her out."

"I'm sure Lady Mary would appreciate it," Thomas muttered.

* * *

"Hello?" Matthew answered the telephone.

"Matthew," Mary breathed. "Oh how I've longed to hear your voice."

"Mary!" Matthew exclaimed. "Wh-What is it? What's wrong? Is Lily?"

"She's fine," she sighed. "She's sleeping, her fever is still rising but she's becoming more and more aware."

"Has she eaten anything? Mother was over yesterday and Robert informed her and she told me that she hasn't."

"I got her to have some broth yesterday afternoon," Mary sighed. "I'm afraid her throat is too sore and it's too hard for her to swallow."

"How are you darling?" Matthew asked.

"Oh Matthew," Mary cried. "She's so suffered. I… I can't stand it but I won't leave her. Not until she is better."

"Are you okay," Matthew reinforced. "Are you taking care of yourself?"

"How do I have time for myself when Lily is so sick?" Mary said. "How are the boys? Not too devastated over no studies I hope." She tried to make a joke but Matthew could hear the pain in her voice.

"My darling when was the last time you have slept, really slept?" he asked.

"Do not be worried about me Matthew, just worry and pray for Lily," she protested. "Are William or Bertie around, may I just say hello."

"Bertie is playing outside with one of the-"

"Not one of the village children I hope," Mary snapped. "Clarkson said its spreading like wildfire in the village. Get him inside at once, _please_ Matthew."

"I'll fetch William for you," Matthew told her and put down the telephone briefly. "William!" He called. The boy appeared from what used to be his office, holding a book in his hand.

"Yes Papa?" he questioned.

"It's your mother," he nodded to the telephone. "She wishes to speak with you and I must get your brother."

"Is it about Lily," William whispered fearfully.

"No, she just wishes to speak with you," Matthew shook his head.

"Mama," William breathed. "How are you?"

"There's my boy," William could practically hear the strain in her voice. "How are you getting on at Gran Iz's, behaving I hope."

"Of course Mama," he chuckled. "Though I've had to have tea with Granny for the past two days since she's been calling on Gran Iz."

"I suspect she'd prefer to get updates on Lily there rather than risk exposure here," Mary commented softly. "Are you keeping up with your work, I'm so sorry that Miss Emily has had to go with Sybil though I suspect she may be let go by Tom any day now."

"Mama how is Lily," William asked. "Papa will tell us nothing, is she getting better?"

"I'm not sure the correct word is better, but she is getting on, she's pushing through like we all knew she would," William wanted to run to Downton and into his mother's arms just to comfort her. He wanted to take back all the times he disobeyed her, he wanted to take back all the times he ignored Lily or yelled at her to leave him alone. He wanted his baby sister healthy.

"Tell her that I love her very much Mama, if she's awake," William said quietly.

"I will my darling, and I love you," Mary sighed.

"I love you too Mama," William replied earnestly. He passed the phone to Bertie who had similar sentiments but quickly passed it on to his father, angry at both of them for making him come inside on a nice day.

"He'll understand," Matthew sighed. "Now, I want you to tell me everything that has been happening. It is not fair on you to have all this burden only on you. Cousin Violet is here, and she has been informed by your father that this is the first time you are leaving the room. Now tell me why."

"It's just," Mary murmured. "When she sleeps she gets the chills, and the only thing to comfort her is more blankets and me, I wrap her in blankets and I wrap myself around her even though I know I should not."

"You should not," Matthew growled.

"Or when she's throwing up, she can't sit up by herself, and she almost always gets it on her nightgown no matter how hard I try to get her to the basin," Mary's voice grew quieter. "I'm the only one in this house here all the time that knows all of this, and Clarkson has other patients he must see to. I'm the only one who got her to eat or to talk or to even try and sit up."

"I feel helpless Mary," Matthew hissed. "I do, I can't stand it. I can't stand that you have to go through this alone, help her alone."

"Dr. Clarkson said that the fever typically lasts five days, this is the fourth, if she keeps going at the rate she is, our baby girl-"

"MARY!" Matthew heard someone shriek on the other line.

"Matthew I must go," Mary hissed. "Mama? Mama what is it?" He heard the phone clatter to the ground but the fear in Mary's voice made Matthew have to keep a grasp on the desk that the phone sat on to keep standing upright.

"Mary!" he called into the phone. "Mary what's happening!"

"It's Lily," he heard Cora whisper harshly.

"Oh dear God no!" Matthew screamed. "Mary! Mary!"

"Matthew?" he heard Cora pick up the phone.

"Cora, what is it?" he gasped; tears were running down his face.

"She started coughing, fairly hard though she wasn't conscious Matthew," he heard the sorrow in Cora's voice. "It's gone into her lungs is what Clarkson said."

"She has-" he couldn't say it. "Will she- Is she?"

"They don't know," Cora shook her head. "We must wait and see."

"Thank you… for telling me," he closed his eyes and put down the phone harshly. He turned around and found his mother there, Cousin Violet, and his boys.

"Papa," Bertie whispered fearfully.

"Boys go to your rooms," Matthew said harshly.

"But Papa," William protested.

"Now," Matthew snapped and seeing his Papa's face red with tears made both of them not want to cross him.

"Matthew," Isobel tested.

"It's gone into her lungs," he cried out, sitting down, his head on his hands. "I'm sorry Cousin Violet, that you must see me this way but…"

"Nonsense," Violet placed a tender hand on his shoulder. He looked up and saw that her eyes had tears in them as well and made no excuses of having a cold for the time being, though she would say so later. They seemed to show her age a lot more prominently before, as if she was thinking that she was supposed to go before her great granddaughter, that it was almost time for her to go, not Lily's. "Your daughter is reason enough for me to see you as such." Matthew nodded and stood up, straight into Isobel's arms.

"It's not a death sentence nowadays my dear boy, she could still live," Isobel murmured into his ear. "We mustn't give up hope, not yet. Not when there is still a chance and there is still a chance."

"Oh mother," Matthew whimpered. "What if I can never see her again?"

"Do not think like that Matthew, please, not now, when Lily needs our prayers now more than ever," Isobel shook her head and let him cry on her shoulder.

* * *

"Help her, help her _please_," Mary begged, almost screamed as she watched her daughter cough and struggle to breathe as the pneumonia that was almost always a consequence of scarlet fever settled into her daughter's almost convulsing body. Her heart wrenched, hearing the words her brother-in-law said to Dr. Clarkson in the very same house eleven years ago when Sybil died.

Now she knew what her Mama felt like that day.

"There's nothing more we can do Lady Mary," he shook his head. "If the pneumonia does not kill her, if she survives the night, she will live. But I must warn you, it seems far advanced. "

"Do not tell me that," Mary hissed. "My daughter will fight, she will fight. She is only three years old." Dr. Clarkson leaned down and listened to the child's lungs again, she was not even conscious yet she seemed to be struggling all the same.

"I hear a large amount of fluid," he sighed. "If she begins to throw up or cough it up, she must be made to sit up and get it out. It may be what saves her."

"I'll do whatever you need," Mary whispered.

"When was the last time you slept Lady Mary?" he asked.

"If you will be led to believe I will leave Lily at a time like this, you are sadly mistaken," Mary snapped. "Oh my baby girl, my poor, poor baby girl." Lily's hair was slick with sweat as Mary rhythmically stroked it.

"Mrs. Hughes has had the maids make up the guest room down the hall," he said quietly. "I'm there if you need me, do not hesitate to ask." Mary nodded and gulped, she had to wait until Clarkson left until she was to do what she was going to do. He nodded at her, turned to the door, and exited down the hall just as Mary tore her mask that she still wore over her face off.

Immediately she did what she was longing to do.

She kissed her hand, she kissed her cheek, she kissed her forehead, and she kissed her hair. The touch she longed for, the comfort she had wanted to give her daughter for so long.

As if it resurrected her, Lily's eyes fluttered open, her mouth attempting to form words before suddenly clear vomit replaced it.

"Good," she whispered. "Oh that's my good girl. Keep going, keep going please my darling. It's alright." She sat her baby upright, held the basin under her head, and murmured soothingly as her tiny body writhed in pain. "That's it. As much as you can darling." Lily shook with effort before going still, ever so still, her eyes fluttering close.

"Oh my baby girl, you are so strong, so strong," she whispered. "I love you so much. I'm incredibly proud of you for fighting this long." A lump grew in Mary's throat as tears spilled out of her eyes, she bent down beside her bed instead of her usual perch on the chair. Her hand grasped Lily's tightly. "Dear Lord, you've blessed me ever so much. You have given me a family I never deserved. Two boys so strong and handsome, a husband who loves me, and this beautiful angel sitting in front of me. I did not deserve them, I don't deserve her, but Lord, she does not deserve this either." Mary's voice cracked with grief. "She's only three years old, she has a life ahead of her and it's not fair. Not fair that she must suffer." Mary pressed her lips to Lily's hand and lifted her eyes to the ceiling. "I'm afraid I've asked too much of you, after all I've done to be discredited in you. You saved and protected my Matthew during the Great War and he has given me my children in return. If someone must die, please Lord, let it be me."

"Or me," a new voice said from the door. Mary jumped up in surprise, relief flooding her limbs as she saw Matthew standing there.

"Oh Matthew," Mary gasped and ran towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Matthew," she began to sob.

"I'm here darling, I'm here," Matthew cried with her. Mary's face buried in his shoulders and Matthew held her tighter.

"I love you so much," Matthew could hardly make out her muffled sob but he said it back anyway. Mary stepped back and looked at him seriously. "What are you doing here?"

"I could not let you be alone with this," he murmured. "I am her father; I shall see her through this too."

"But what about Bertie and William," Mary sniffled. "They need you too."

"They need you as well, but it seems you have given up the mask," he eyed it discarded in the room.

"It's the only comfort I could provide her," Mary whispered. "She's… oh Matthew she's…"

"She's going to have you and me by her side until it is all over," Matthew took Mary's hand and walked to his daughter's bedside and gasped slightly. Ever so lightly he bent over, kissed her forehead, and settled in a seat. He took one of Lily's hands and reached over her body to gesture for Mary's hand. Mary did the same, connecting all three of them. "We are in this together, all three of us."

"All night," Mary whimpered. "Dr. Clarkson said if she survives the night she'll live." She heard Matthew's breath hitch.

"I've come just in time then," he sighed.

"Thank god you did," Mary closed her eyes as Matthew began to speak again.

"Our God, which art in heaven…"

* * *

_So this was an overall depressing chapter I guess, sorry. But you got to see moments of William and Bertie being concerned for their little sister, Matthew, Isobel, and Violet too! There is a reason for this whole storyline I promise you! Sorry if some of the symptoms/things are not historically accurate. I hate history, a lot! Haha (:_

_Please review and let me know what you think! The recent response has made me so appreciative and I have been on a roll for writing this story, I am several chapters ahead now!_


	10. Chapter 10

_Life of a Lily Chapter 10_

_I just wanted to take this time to thank everyone for their amazing feedback, particularly the past couple of chapters! You guys are awesome, since I am now ahead in chapters, you should expect updates more often, maybe three times a week or it might stay at two depending on when I feel as though I should put the chapters up!_

_This chapter resolves a lot of your questions (and pleading lol!)_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

Somehow, Mary was unaware of exactly how, Lily survived the night.

It had not been easy, Matthew and Mary had not slept at all, had not let go of each other's hands, until Lily would writhe in pain and begin to vomit or cough again.

It didn't matter how anymore, she survived and that was all that mattered.

"Her fever has gone down considerably so," Clarkson informed them later that day. "And her lungs are still in bad shape, but she is out of the woods I'm glad to say." Mary, as if her whole body melted away, collapsed into a seat and sobbed in relief. "I've given her something to help her sleep the whole day and I've gotten the idea from Lady Grantham and Mr. Crawley to give it to you as well."

"No, I must stay with her," Mary protested weakly, though her body protested.

"You can continue to sleep in here if you must Lady Mary, but you have little to no say in this matter," Dr. Clarkson said. "It is a miracle that it did not spread to you, you took very little care of yourself throughout the time Miss Lily was sick and now it is time you did." He glanced at Matthew. "And it still could."

"Mary _please_," Matthew sighed from where he stood by the door.

"Lord Grantham has given orders that this hallway remains silent, save for me, Mr. Crawley, or the nurse for the entire day, giving both of you time to recover from this ordeal," Clarkson said.

"What if-" Mary began.

"In the days to come," Clarkson informed her. "She will no longer be contagious, grow much stronger, and most likely not realize anything that happened and you are going to need the strength to help her stay in bed and recover. And if she is anything like a certain Lady I know," there was a hint of amusement in the doctor's eye. "She will not be very cooperative."

"That is an understatement," Matthew chuckled and Mary threw him a look. "Please darling, rest today, Lily might be awake tomorrow and if you collapse from exhaustion and miss it you will not be very happy with yourself, I know you." He leaned down a kissed her on the cheek before pulling her to her feet and leading her over to Jensen's bed. "Soon Mrs. Jensen will be back and she will not be alone at all." Mary collapsed in it gratefully.

"Tell her I love her," Mary murmured tiredly, having not even swallowed the medicine yet.

"She knows Mary," Matthew smiled. "You stayed with her for five days straight, she knows very well that you love her, but I will anyway to placate you."

"Thank y-" she trailed off as she passed out from sheer exhaustion. Matthew walked over to Lily's bed and looked down. She was sleeping soundly but she still looked rather uncomfortable. The rash still covered her from head to toe, that was going to be the problem. Her rash might not disappear for another two weeks and would stay in bed or at least the house until then. He was not looking forward to that especially when she was alert enough to want to go outside. Her stroked her sweaty hair that clung to her face, she had faced so much and he was so relieved she pulled through.

Despite everything that made her look different, she was still beautiful to him; she was still his baby girl.

"I love you sweet girl and so does your Mama," he pressed his lips to her flushed cheeks and exited the room. He went downstairs to the sitting room, where Robert, Cora, and Isobel were waiting anxiously.

"How is she Matthew?" Isobel asked. Matthew looked up with tears in his eyes.

"Good, so good," Matthew smiled. "Her fever is almost gone and with that she is no longer contagious anymore."

"Thank God," Robert sighed. "It's such great news, where is Mary? Asleep I hope."

"She was gone the second her head hit the pillow," Matthew informed them. "She was-"

"A better mother to Lily than I ever dreamed was possible," Cora mentioned. "She didn't leave her side and I'm afraid to say I would have."

"None of that matters now," Isobel said. "Now, Mrs. Jensen is watching the boys and under strict instructions not to bring them here or play with the village children. You my boy are sleeping as well, because we all know you did not sleep at all last night either."

"I promised Mary-" he tried to protest.

"The maids have just cleaned your dressing room, I know you would prefer not to sleep in you and Mary's bed without her," Cora explained.

"Tell the boys please," Matthew mumbled. "I would have liked to tell them myself but I see that it no longer an option."

"It isn't," Isobel reaffirmed and Matthew nodded, resigned, and left the room.

"We shall celebrate when you wake," Robert commented. He found Carson in the foyer.

"Carson," he said, fatigue suddenly hitting him. "I know how much you and the rest of the staff care for Lily, and Lady Mary and I are so grateful for all of you, for what you did. I will go down to thank everyone else properly as well, perhaps with Lady Mary, but for now please realize that I appreciate everything."

"It was not a problem sir," Carson nodded at him. "I'd do it again and so would the staff. The news has spread down there by down, and we are all so pleased."

"I hate to ask this but if Anna could check on Lady Mary from time to time, they both run little risk of spreading the disease but I'm not entirely sure I trust Mary to stay in bed for long," Matthew said tiredly.

"If you wish sir," Carson said. "I shall pass it on."

"Thank you Carson," Matthew breathed and stumbled up the stairs, collapsing gratefully into his bed, sleeping only because he knew Mary was, and that Lily was finally safe.

* * *

"Papa," Lily exclaimed, or it would have been exclaimed if she had not been so tired. Matthew's heart broke as tears pooled around her eyes and she reached her arms out for him. It had been four days since her fever broke and Clarkson was confident that she was no longer contagious, and even though she was already cuddled in Mary's arms, Matthew sat on the edge of the bed calmly and watched as she weakly gave a brief look to her mother who nodded. The next second it seemed to take all of her strength to sit up gently and practically launch herself in Matthew's arms.

"There's my girl," Matthew sighed contently, pushing his nose deep into her curly mess on top of her head. Even though the rash was still there, she looked and felt so much healthier.

"I missed you," she cried. "Why were you not here?" Her voice cracked. He had been here, every day, but she was never conscious long enough or too groggy to realize it. All she could remember was throwing up, terrified, with only her Mama to comfort her.

"Lily darling do not wear yourself out, please," Mary murmured, one hand on her back. She turned to Matthew. "I have cleared it with Clarkson that she will be taking a bath and if she's asleep for that well, I cannot promise that I won't get absolutely soaked either." Matthew nodded and simply held Lily closer, not wanting to let her go.

Lily threw her mother a mutinous look and curled around Matthew, taking his tightening grip as a sign he missed her too.

"You do not know the strength in which I have missed you my sweet girl," Matthew whispered. "I love you so much and I am so glad you are feeling better." Lily seemed to be too exhausted to continue speaking so she simply gripped the fabric of his shirt tightly, mumbling incoherently into his chest. Matthew rocked her for a few minutes and murmured comforting words in her ear.

"My love, let's get a bath, how does that sound?" Mary stroked her daughter's hair. "And then maybe after we can try some more broth or even real food."

"Okay," Lily lifted her head and held out her arms for Mary. Reluctantly Matthew let her go into Mary's arms and watched as she turned around. "Papa?"

"I shall come too Lily, if you want me to," Matthew nodded and Lily nodded against her mother's chest, relaxing into her arms as she walked into the bathroom.

"It feels odd to be doing this myself," Mary sighed. "But how is that hunt for a tutor going? I think even Lily is beginning to miss Mrs. Jensen." Gently Mary removed Lily's clothing and put the young girl in the tub. They watched as her whole body relaxed visibly.

"This rash is going to be the problem, isn't it?" Matthew pointed out.

"You missed our gentle fight earlier, she wanted to go o-u-t-s-i-d-e," Mary smirked as she ran a bar of soap down Lily's arms. Matthew chuckled. "Hardly conscious I might add, and wanting to run around."

"We are in for an interesting few weeks," he shook his head.

"Have the boys finished packing their stuff up?" Mary asked. "I did see them yesterday but, I'm missing hearing them around the house. It's been awfully quiet the past week."

"I'm not sure if it is all them but a certain little girl I know," Matthew said playfully looking at his daughter who was listening to their concentration with intrigue. She smiled up at him and Matthew cupped her soapy cheek. Her eyes were drooping already; she had been awake for an hour, the most since falling ill.

"We are almost done darling, tip your head back for Mama and we will wash your hair," Mary said softly. "And then we will have lunch and then you can rest again."

"No rest," she shook her head sleepily as she obeyed her mother. "I want to play outside."

"I'm sorry Lily but I've already told you that you must rest," Mary shook her head. "Mrs. Jensen, however, is coming back today. And maybe when you feel up to it you can play with-" Mary trailed off. With what? What was there for Lily to play with… nothing. Thankfully Lily was not listening to her, she already turned her head to Matthew and pouted her lower lip. Despite the fact that she was no longer sick, Matthew could hardly resist her when she was her usual self. Her lip protruding from the face still red with a rash made Matthew's heart clench.

"It's really not fair that we were given such an adorable child," Matthew shook his head. "Lily, Papa will say the same as Mama, I'm sorry darling but you cannot tire yourself out." Mary rinsed the shampoo out of her hair and grabbed a towel, snatching her out of the tub letting Matthew unplug the drain. Mary put her in another nightgown and settled her in bed.

"I've asked Mama to get Lily new dresses with strict instructions to get her everyday dresses, nothing extravagant," Mary explained as Matthew raised his eyebrow at the choice of outfit. "Perhaps I should ask Isobel to chaperone her."

Mary had to sit in bed with her to hold her upright while Matthew helped feed her, making her finish half a bowl of broth and a take a timid bite of a sandwich. She couldn't have managed any more, Lily's eyes were drooping significantly and Mary let her go and stood up. However, Lily's eyes suddenly cleared.

"Red?" she murmured and Mary's eyes widened and she eyed Matthew warily. She was dreading the day her daughter would ask for her favorite stuffed dog that was now a pile of ash. Her arms reached out for the dog, expecting Mary or Matthew to place it into her arms.

"Lily, Mama cannot bring you Red, I'm sorry," Mary placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Why?" Lily's voice cracked.

"It's the very reason your sheets are no longer your sheets," Matthew sighed, sitting on the edge of her bed. "Because you were very sick."

"I want Red," she cried. "Where's Red?"

"Lily girl you are going to tire yourself out, please calm down," Mary bit her lip and looked helpless. "I'm sorry but I cannot give you Red."

"No Mama, I want Red," she cried.

"We… we cannot bring you Red anymore. Not now or ever. Red had to be taken away."

"NO!" she wailed. "RED!" Lily began to sob and Mary reached out to comfort her but Lily attempted to push away from her. "Papa!" Matthew sent an apologetic glance at Mary and gathered Lily in his arms and rocked her back and forth like he would have done when she was young enough to be rocked on the rocking chair that was now in the attic. He saw the pain in Mary's face from being rejected from the child she nursed back to health for days, all because she said that she could not give her the stuffed animal.

"Shhh my darling, it's alright," Matthew murmured. "Papa's got you, it's alright. We can get you another stuffed dog, a better stuffed dog. I'm sorry we cannot bring you Red." He felt his shirt grow wet with her tears but also felt her sobs begin to fizzle out along with the last of her energy. Mary stood up and walked out of the room after kissing Lily on the head, hesitantly, Matthew put her to bed and ran after Mary.

"She hates me," she whispered, her face in her hands. "I took away her dog and she hates me for it."

"Do not say that Mary, she is upset," Matthew reaffirmed. "She does not hate you. She adores you, you are her Mama."

"No, she hates me," Mary cried.

"She's okay now, but Mary who knows what would happen if she played with the dog again and got sick again, you would never forgive yourself no matter how upset she is over losing it," Matthew grabbed her arms and made her meet his eyes. "There is no way she can hate you, after the way you cared for her."

"Okay," Mary nodded. "Okay."

* * *

"But I want to go," Lily whimpered as she looked at her brothers who were sitting on her bed. The red rash that still lit her cheeks aflame was turning pink now, a little more than a week later.

"I'm sorry Lil," William sighed. "I promise to tell you everything Bertie and I do, so it will be like you came with us."

"The Downton Fair may come only ever so often, but the next time there is no doubt you can go," Mary reassured her. She stroked her cheek. Lily flinched away. "And tomorrow Dr. Clarkson promised to let us know if he thinks you are strong enough to leave your room tomorrow."

"Papa may I go to the fair?"

"Why do you believe asking me will solve all your problems," Matthew chuckled and kissed her head. "No I'm afraid your Mama is right, you cannot go." Lily looked dismayed.

"Stay," she mumbled.

"If you do not wish for me to go-" Matthew began uneasily.

"Papa," Bertie complained. "You promised."

"Lily," Mrs. Jensen's stern voice arose from the corner. Since Lily's sickness and Mrs. Jensen's return, the older woman had been almost inseparable from the child and Lily to her. Mary almost felt jealous at their newfound closeness, but she shook it away. "You do not want your brother's to be disappointed do you?" Lily's lower lip trembled.

"No," she huffed.

"And Mama is staying; I can read you whatever story-"

"Mrs. Jensen can," Lily sniffed and Mary gasped at her daughter's harshness, for a second it seemed as if Lily was acting exactly like she had as a young child, superior, acting like she ran Downton.

"If you wish darling," Mary stood and got off of the bed. She turned away. "Perhaps I'll ring for Anna, she can get me dressed for dinner. Granny and Isobel are coming tonight to even the numbers with you gone tonight Matthew." Matthew watched as Lily looked at her mother in shock, the three year old looking slightly ashamed at herself.

He nodded at Mrs. Jensen and kissed Lily on the cheek.

"Goodbye my darling, we will be home soon," Matthew dismissed.

"Goodbye Lily, I'm so glad you are feeling better," Bertie called and William bent down next to his little sister.

"Be nice to Mama, she's ever so sorry about Red and you know it," he said. Matthew grabbed Mary's hand as she rushed off to her room.

"You said she'd forget Matthew, if you haven't noticed she didn't," Mary hissed. "And now she prefers the nanny over me!"

"Mary, perhaps you should come with us to the fair, Mrs. Jensen has Lily and it will be good for you Mary, to get out," Matthew told her. "I'm afraid I must insist."

"Oh you insist so that means I must go," Mary rolled her eyes. "I was thinking of returning to my first dinner with Granny but if you insist." Matthew did not take to heart her bitter tone, he knew Lily's attitude towards her since last week was leaving Mary feel useless and dismayed all of the time.

"Mary," Matthew sighed. "She'll come around. Your daughter is stubborn."

"Oh so she's just _my_ daughter now," Mary's eyebrows rose.

"Because the trait is completely yours, yes," Matthew kissed her cheek fondly. "Now please my darling, come with us."

"Please Mama," Bertie begged. "William and I wish you would go!"

"Alright, alright," she sighed and ruffled Bertie's hair fondly. "You two are just enjoying your last day off before your tutor arrives tomorrow bright and early." William rolled his eyes at his mother's comment. Mary spent the entire walk to the village where the fair was taking place looking over her shoulder, as if someone would be calling for her because Lily wanted her.

"Mama, will you ride the carousel with me?" Bertie asked politely.

"I'm not in much of a mood to spin Bertie, I'm sorry," Mary excused. "You have your fun." They safely put the boys on the carousel and Matthew led her to a nearby booth.

"Two games," he said to the man and they were each handed three balls.

"I'm rotten at this game Matthew," Mary sighed.

"Perhaps your luck will change and you can win a stuffed animal for Lily," Matthew quipped. Mary's eyes widened in anticipation, as if it could win her daughter's heart back. She scowled as all three of her balls missed their target and she was left with nothing. Matthew, however, succeeded in winning a bear.

For the rest of the night Mary was determined to win a game and win a stuffed animal, but after spending a lot of money she gave up, her hands moving to cover her face.

"Mary darling, you can give her this," he gestured to the teddy bear in his arms.

"But I did not win it for her Matthew," Mary cried out indignantly. "I cannot be false to her. I must give her something I won or nothing at all. I sat and watched as Clarkson collected every stuffed animal to burn, some she never touched. She's miserable because of me."

"Mary calm down please," Matthew whispered. "She loves you."

"Stop saying she loves me when she clearly does not, my own daughter hates me after I went through so much," Mary's voice cracked. "And now I'm blaming her, what a horrid mother I am."

"Mama you are not horrid," William spoke up.

"You are the best Mama!" Bertie chimed in.

"Not according to your sister," Mary sighed. "I'm sorry darlings, I've put a damper on our evening and now we must be going."

"Perhaps try one more game Mama, just in case your luck has changed," William suggested. "Here…" He ran over to a booth and pulled a coin out of his pocket. "For my Mama." Mary scowled but the hope in her son's eyes brought her to the booth. With a sigh she took a ring and flung in aimlessly towards a spike.

"At least try Mary," Matthew rolled his eyes.

"I paid my own money for it _please_," William said.

"And where did you get said money," Mary said despondently.

"Mama," William sighed.

"If you insist," she hissed and narrowed her eyes at a spike, tossed the ring, and her eyes widened as it landed perfectly. "Oh my."

"Here you go Lady Mary, sorry, my prizes are not quite up to par to what they would have been an hour ago," the man from the booth excused, handing her a tiny doll. Mary looked down at it disappointedly.

"You can still have the bear," Matthew offered.

"Lily will love it," Bertie reassured.

"Well done Mama," William congratulated.

"It's better than nothing I suppose," Mary clutched the doll in her hand. Matthew went to her side and offered his arm which Mary took. It felt so wrong to not have Lily there as the boys ran ahead, relishing in their last night of freedom. "I don't know what to do without her; I have no one to keep a fairly close watch on."

"Do remember she can leave her room tomorrow if she is up for it," Matthew chuckled. "And with the rash almost gone outside probably in a week. We shall have our little banshee back in no time."

"Matthew I was so scared we were going to lose her," Mary whispered. "If I lost her I feel like I'd lose myself in the process. Without you in my life, I'd feel half myself, without our children, even just one of them, I'd feel empty, I'd feel as if I wanted to die too."

"Good thing we didn't lose her then," Matthew covered her hand with his own.

"But Matthew I feel as though I have," Mary sighed as the Abbey came into view. "It will be too late to give her these tonight, she will be asleep by the time we get up to her room."

"I know the key for her getting back to her usual self is rest," he shook his head. "But I feel as though she's slept enough in these past few weeks that she will forgive us for waking her. Especially since we have yet to allow her to play with any of the replacement toys, since they are all in the day nursery and library."

"Oh God," Mary giggled softly. "I do hope they went through to the drawing room, I could imagine Granny's face."

"She'd know it was for Lily and then she'd understand, do remember our daughter has us all wrapped around her tiny finger, even the staff," Matthew mentioned.

"I was a terror when I was little and thought I owned the place, and the only member of the staff who liked me was Carson," Mary smiled at Matthew. "I feel as though our little quarrel right now will not be the last."

"Thank you Alfred," Matthew nodded to the footman as they opened the door. "Make our excuses to Lord and Lady Grantham, we may make it back down but tell them not to expect us."

"Of course sir," Alfred nodded. Together they went to the nursery, Mrs. Jensen was sitting up reading, but Lily was fast asleep.

"If you could excuse us for a moment Mrs. Jensen, I'm sorry," Mary said.

"Not at all milady," Mrs. Jensen left, for she too felt bad for the young girl's new found love for her and contempt for her mother. "I'll just be in the other room."

"Lily, Lily my darling wake up," Matthew whispered to her, sitting on the edge of her bed. "Papa and Mama have a surprise for you." Lily's eyes opened groggily and her small fist rubbed at her eyes.

"What is it?" she murmured.

"Well we've just come back from the fair, and we've won you-" Lily shot straight up. Mary didn't have a moment to pull out the doll before Lily reached around Matthew's back and saw the bear.

"Papa! Thank you," she giggled as he regretfully handed it to her and she hugged her close to her chest. She reached up and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you! Thank you!" Mary turned away.

"Mama too Lily girl, Mama won you something as well," Matthew pointed out.

"Mama?" Lily said hopefully. Mary slowly turned back to face her daughter and held out the pitiful looking doll to Matthew's bear.

"It is not much my darling," she murmured but Lily giggled with glee as she took it too and hugged it to her chest. And that's when Mary realized it wasn't the toys themselves making her happy, but who won them to make it up for her.

"Thank you Mama," she jumped on her bed and reached out her arms for Mary to hold her.

"Down Lily," Matthew chastised.

"Oh Matthew let her have her fun," Mary picked the little girl up.

"Can we play now Mama?" Lily asked.

"No we cannot silly girl," Mary shook her head. "Tomorrow we have such wonderful surprises for you so you must go to sleep now."

"Mama can you read to me?" she said sweetly and Mary dissolved into tears.

"Oh of course my darling," she pressed a kiss to her head. "And would you like your bear and doll to be tucked into bed with you? They may not be as good as Red-"

"But they are Mama," the three year old giggled and scrambled out of her arms and into bed. As if it was an answer Lily held the bear tightly in her arms and placed the doll directly next to her. "I love you Mama, I love you Papa!"

"Now what shall we read tonight?" Lily thought carefully.

"Wedding," she giggled.

"That's not a story my darling, it's hardly a book," Matthew shook his head.

"Please Mama," Lily puckered out her bottom lip. Mary's heart leapt, somehow, in just a matter of minutes, Matthew became the one who said no and Mary was the one who she begged to.

"Oh Matthew just go and get it," Mary said softly, sitting in bed. "It's what she wants."

"Isn't this a role reversal," Matthew chuckled as Lily curled up on Mary's lap.

"Thank you Mama," she mumbled as Matthew reentered, carrying their wedding album. He handed it to Mary.

"I'm not sure how to tell a story about this," Matthew bit his lip. "That's appropriate."

"Mama you look like a princess," Lily gasped, her tiny fingers running over the page. "Mama is a princess Papa. Does that make you a prince?"

"I'm not sure about that my darling-" Matthew began but broke off. "Yes, your Mama is a princess, especially that day." His eyes were shining as he looked at Mary who rolled her eyes playfully and flipped the page, Lily gasping again. Maybe it wasn't the best bedtime story for the little girl who still needed a rest. "And I suppose that makes me a prince, and the story was just like Cinderella you see."

"How?" Lily's eyes widened.

"Well we lost each other, for a long long time, and it took me a while to realize that it was your Mama who belonged with me, who's-"

"Whose foot fit in the shoe?" Lily giggled.

"Maybe we could say who fit in my arms perfectly, who completed me," Matthew said.

"Just as you belong right here my girl," Mary whispered. "In my arms."

"More," Lily yawned and nestled in her Mama's arms.

"They met at a dinner party, and neither of them noticed each other until it was too late, until something called the Great War split them up," Matthew continued. "And the prince, he searched far and thought that he found her again in London, but that was not his true love. He felt he had to settle for her until one day he realized that Cinderella, his princess, was right in front of him the whole time. And-"

"The shoe fit," Mary laughed quietly. "Goodness Matthew that was the corniest bedtime story I have ever heard."

"Shhh," he whispered, gesturing to a sleeping Lily. Mary had to pry her little fingers of the album before handing it to Matthew and settling her baby girl in bed, making sure her doll and bear were next to her.

"I'm so glad she forgave me," Mary sighed.

"How could she not, she loves her Mama."

"Speaking of love Matthew, you make it sound so easy what we went through to fall in love," Mary chuckled.

"I'm sorry but it's true, you were right in front of me and I was a fool to not see you, to not realize that you loved me, to tell you we were cursed to-"

"There's no need to bring up those skeletons Matthew, I love you, here, now, and always, that's all that matters; that and the fact we shall make sure our children know it, see it, and realize that they are a product of love, not duty," Mary whispered.

"As long as we can spare certain details with Lily," Matthew hissed. "Because she can be in the dark on that subject for a while."

"Oh Matthew."

* * *

_you all thought I was going to kill one of them ;) No, this story will have a lot of angst eventually, but I am not so quick to kill of some of the main characters this early (believe what you will about this sentence, I could be planning to kill someone or I could not be!)… but ultimately this story has a happy ending!_

_Please review and let me know what you think, I gave you significantly less angst this chapter and cute moments (and a very corny bedtime story!) _


	11. Chapter 11

_Life of a Lily Chapter 11_

_So I know I promised you all three chapters a week, but somehow my Bio exam Friday and finals all next week slipped my mind. That is the bad news. The good news is after finals are over, I am free for the summer to write as I please!_

_Here is the last chapter of Lily at three years old! Enjoy!_

* * *

Life at the Abbey was slowly beginning to gain a sense of normalcy as the month went on.

"Lily darling please do be careful," Mary called as she sat in a bench under the shade. Today was her first day outside, her rash having disappeared almost completely from her body, and today was special too. Sybil and Tom had come over as well as Edith, Anthony, Theo, and Lizzie. In the distance she saw Robert, Matthew, Tom, and Anthony eying her carefully as well.

"Mama," she complained and ran away from Elizabeth who was chasing after her.

"Lizzie please come over here for a minute," Edith said. Elizabeth, who was three years old than Lily, marched over unhappily.

"What is it Mama?" she looked at her indignantly.

"I just wanted to say that you must be gentle with Lily, she is just getting over being ill and your Aunt Mary does not want her tired out or hurting herself, so that means no running," Edith informed her daughter.

"I am sorry Aunt Mary," Elizabeth said.

"It's alright Lizzie, it is not your fault, Lily is too adventurous for her own good," Mary reassured the young girl. Lizzie ran back to Lily suggesting they sit on the blanket and play with some of Lily's new dolls. Knowingly Lily threw a look in Mary's direction before agreeing to do so. Mary caught Matthew's eye across the yard and he smirked at her. "Thank you Edith. She has been eager to get back to normal but I am afraid she tires much more quickly, and Dr. Clarkson has warned us her immune system will be compromised still."

"I couldn't imagine it, what you went through Mary," Edith shook her head. "It is no trouble at. She is my niece after all. I do love her."

"I know you do," Mary smiled. " And you would have rose to it too Edith, but I thank god you did not have to," Mary reassured her. "It wasn't easy, but I feel like we are all stronger because of it. And perhaps Lily feels that too which is why her energy level is up even higher than usual and maybe that's why she's tiring herself out quickly."

They observed their daughter's closely, an older Sybil sitting down beside them gracefully talking to them but not playing with them.

"I wonder what Sybil would think of Tom letting Sybbie keep her governess for the rest of the year, she has turned into quite the little young lady," Edith commented. "She is going to the village school next year but she acts like a lady."

"Much nicer than one," Mary smiled fondly at her sister and they laughed.

"Thank god neither of us has two daughters, it's strange, that we both had no problem having boys," Edith laughed along with her.

"Mama look at me!" Lily trilled as she got up and began to twirl in circles. Mary closed her eyes and sighed, so much for her taking it easy. And it did not help that today was a fairly warm day and it had rained all week, even if Lily had not been sick they would have been going outside and Lily would be running around like a banshee.

"Lily please my darling, take it easy," Mary said.

"I can do it Mama, look at me!" she continued to giggle. She looked across the yard and suddenly saw where Bertie, William, and Theo had disappeared to. "Bertie! Will!" Her tiny legs took off in their direction and immediately Mary stood up.

"Lily Isobel get back here at once!" Mary called. Tom was closer to her than Matthew, and Mary watched as her daughter ignored her words and continued running towards her brothers, Tom jogged after her and picked her up.

"Woah there little lady," he chuckled, watching her legs kick.

"No! Uncle Tom! No!" she whined and Matthew jogged over to them.

"Lily, what have Mama and I told you?" Matthew said as Tom put her down. "You mustn't run, not yet. You must take it easy."

"But Papa I want to run," she complained. "I feel fine!"

"Perhaps it's time to bring her inside Matthew," Mary fretted.

"No _please_ Mama," Lily wailed. "I just want to play."

"But darling you have not followed any of our rules," Mary bent down beside her. She took her little hands in hers. "I know you are feeling a lot healthier Lily, but that does not mean you are better. If you tire yourself out too quickly you could get very sick again. And you don't want that, do you?"

"No," she shook her head.

"Now do you want to go inside?" Mary asked her again. She reached out and brushed dirt away from her dress, she had certainly not been taking it easy at all if she was this dirty.

"Can I sit with you and Aunt Edith?" Lily raised her eyebrow and Mary laughed outright, her daughter had somehow managed to match the expression she usually wore when she wanted to compromise. Everyone else saw it too and began to laugh along with her. Mary set Lily down and held her hand firmly to keep her from running away.

"Lily," Robert said. "I have a surprise for you tomorrow, so if you do not tire yourself out today or tomorrow morning, it shall give you something to look forward to." Lily's eyes brightened considerably at this.

"I hope it's not another stuffed dog," Mary looked at her father incredulously, because he hadn't even informed her of this surprise. But at least it made Lily slow her pace as they walked back to Edith, Lizzie, and Sybbie. "Because after she refused the first six I do not believe seventh times the charm exactly works."

"Oh Mary, it's much better than a stuffed dog."

* * *

Mary's eyes narrowed at her father as he, arm in arm with her mother, lead Mary, Matthew, and Lily to the stable; Bertie and William not excused from their studies today. Today it was just for Lily.

"One, two, three…" Matthew chuckled.

"UP!" Lily giggled as Matthew and Mary, who had Lily's hand secured in theirs, swung her up. Her hair flying wildly in the air, Mary caught a brief glimpse of the only section of skin that bore sign of how sick Lily had been.

"That's enough," Matthew said. "No more."

"One more time, _please_ Papa," Lily pouted her lip.

"Oh fine," Matthew gave in easily and Mary's eyes sparkled with amusement. "One, two, three."

"UP!" Lily squealed at the same time Mary muttered under her breath.

"Push over."

"One more, pleaseeeeee," Lily begged.

"No Lily you mustn't tire yourself out," Mary shook her head.

"Papa," Lily cried and Matthew sent an apologetic glance to Mary, it didn't take much of Lily's begging at all when it was something as innocent as this that she wanted to get away with.

"One, two, three-"

"Up," Robert interrupted as they swung her up; he somehow managed to catch her in the air and held her in his arms. "Would you like to see the surprise Grandpapa has for you?"

"Yes please," Lily giggled and kissed his cheek sweetly.

"Although I'm not sure Mary and Matthew will approve," Cora looked at her daughter and son-in-law hesitantly.

"Oh goodness, what could it be?" Mary joined hands with Matthew where Lily was no longer. They watched as they disappeared into one of the buildings.

"PUPPIES!" Lily squealed, and despite how well she had been the rest of the day before and the morning, Lily ran towards the dogs that were piled near Isis in the stable. They were all yellow labs, similar to Isis, and as they entered behind them, Mary watched as several of the puppies barreled into her knocking her down.

"Papa," she hissed.

"Look Mary, she's positively happy," Robert smiled as Lily continued to giggle despite being on the ground and lost in a sea of puppies.

"When are they going to all go?" Matthew asked, having known about Isis' litter before. "Surely you already have owners for them all."

"I did," Robert nodded Mary let out a sigh of relief. "Until a few days ago. Now I have one puppy left and no buyers I'm afraid. I might have to just keep her, I'm sure Isis would be happy."

"She's a dog Papa," Mary rolled her eyes keeping a watchful eye on Lily. "I don't know if happy is the right word."

"Or you can take her," Robert suggested.

"What?" Mary exclaimed. "We live in the same house Papa, you would-"

"But for Lily?" Robert asked, Lily, hearing her name, sat up and looked in the direction of her Grandpapa.

"Yes Grandpapa?" Lily perked up. Robert looked at Matthew and Mary for a brief second before bending down beside his granddaughter.

"Would you like to keep one of the puppies Lily, so we could have two dogs at Downton?" he suggested. Lily's eyes lit up.

"YES!" she gasped in surprise. "YES! YES! YES!" She jumped into Robert's arms and kissed him on the cheek over and over. "Thank you Grandpapa, thank you!"

"Lily I-" Mary stuttered but looked at how happy her daughter was. It was the happiest she has seen her look since she got sick. She turned to Matthew. "I guess we have a dog now."

"Which one is mine Grandpapa?" Lily smiled up at him and he pointed to the smallest, the runt of the litter, the one that was chasing her tail wildly.

"I was thinking for her name, Cleopatra?" he lifted Lily onto his knee. "What do you think?"

"Cleo!" Lily clapped and she scrambled over to the dog. She was so happy Mary and Matthew didn't even have the heart to tell her to take it easy.

"Mama, Papa, meet Cleo," Lily giggled. "Grandmama too!" Matthew chuckled as Lily gathered the puppy in her arms and sat down with a bump, petting her back gently.

"Remember when I first got Pharaoh?" Robert chuckled. "Mary wouldn't let the poor thing walk for days."

"Oh dear," Mary chuckled. Matthew bent down and pet the puppy.

"And who is caring for her?" he looked at Robert.

"The staff of course," Robert shrugged. "I'm sure James and Alfred will have quite the time letting her out."

"And where is she sleeping?" Mary inquired.

"In a cage in the servants hall until she is old enough to- well then that is your decision," Robert made light of the situation.

"And I assume everything is all ready for us?" Mary said dryly.

"Back at the house," Robert nodded. "She didn't want a replacement stuffed dog, so how about a real dog?"

"Only that logic makes sense in your head Papa," Mary shook her head but laughed as Lily stood up, struggling to carry the puppy who was desperate to lick her face. "Well our lives will be interesting from here on out, won't they?"

* * *

"And Grandpapa says that I will learn to walk her, and to feed her, and that she will follow me around everywhere like Isis does to him because she will be very loyal," Lily babbled. Mary looked amused. Violet and Isobel had come to dinner early to see Lily, but Mary was not sure this was exactly what Violet had in mind as they sat in the library.

"Really?" Violet said, pretending to be intrigued. "Have you told your Gran Iz this yet?"

"No, I haven't," Lily giggled and scurried off to the other side of the room to pull on Isobel's dress.

"I'm sorry Granny, she's-"

"She's better, I suppose that's all that matters, though I do not remember her being this active before," she chuckled.

"Oh you have never seen her after nap time Granny," Mary shook her head. "If not for Mrs. Jensen to help calm her, she would have even Sybil beaten as the most rebellious child."

"So my daughter has talked your ear off about her puppy, has she Cousin Violet," Matthew smirked, coming to stand beside Mary a hand on her shoulder.

"Indeed she has," Violet nodded. "My son can be an idiot sometimes."

"I was shocked initially," Mary said. "But now we are just treating Cleo as the family's puppy, not just hers, although she does not see it that way. We would have gotten one eventually."

"And I can do it all by myself, Grandpapa said," they heard Lily explain. Isobel was actually intrigued to hear what the young girl had to say.

"She doesn't mean that, right Mama," William laughed from where he was sitting next to Sybil and Tom. "We are to help too, right?"

"Of course darling," Mary smiled. "Just do not break it to your sister just yet."

"Labradors are loyal Mary, they will pick a favorite," Robert said proudly.

"Grandmama, thank you for my dress," Lily giggled as she twirled in the newest dress she had on. "Mama let me where it today!"

"I see that," Cora smiled. "It is a shame you have already eaten dinner, isn't it." Mary covered her mouth to control her laughter as Lily, ever the dramatic, threw an eye roll.

"Yes it _is_," she sighed and the whole room burst into laughter. Knowing it was her who amused them Lily smiled proudly before she covered her mouth to try and hide a yawn.

"Someone is tired," Mary said.

"No Mama," she shook her head but Matthew already moved to ring the bell.

"I'm sorry my dear but our dinner is almost ready," she said.

"But Bertie, Will, and Sybbie get to join you," she whined.

"Only William and Sybbie do my dear," Cora said. "And only three times a week." Lily pouted and sighed as Mrs. Jensen arrived.

"Say goodnight to everyone my darling," Matthew said. Lily dutifully made her way around the room, kissing each member of the family on the cheek before going to Mrs. Jensen's side.

"Mama and Papa will be up in just a moment Lily girl," Mary promised, allowing Mrs. Jensen to bring her up, bathe her, and change her into her nightclothes. She was already tucked into bed when Mary and Matthew opened the door.

"Story?" she asked hopefully.

"It must be a short one," Mary told her.

"Cleo?" she continued to ask.

"Absolutely not," Matthew chuckled. "The nursery is no place for a puppy my sweet girl, you know that already."

"Fine," she sighed. "May I just go to bed then?"

"You were just trying your luck, weren't you?" Mary smiled sitting down on the edge of her bed and cupping her cheek. "Goodnight my darling, sweet dreams."

"Goodnight Mama," Lily giggled as Mary leaned over and kissed her cheek, hovering for a second to catch her daughter's eye before sneaking in another kiss eliciting another laugh from Lily. "Goodnight Papa."

"Goodnight Lily," Matthew said leaning over and kissing her on the nose. Immediately she wriggled it and smiled up at him, turning over and grasping her bear tightly in her hand, her doll that Mary won was now in the toy chest, better for playing than sleeping with. They returned downstairs, nodding to Mrs. Jensen as they left.

"Robert, I hope you realize that she tried to get us to bring the puppy into her room," Matthew shook his head at his father-in-law.

"All little girls should have puppies," Robert said proudly.

"Unless Tom Branson is their father," Tom chuckled and looked at Sybbie who pouted.

"Or Sir Anthony I'm afraid," Cora added.

"So there we have it darling," Mary smirked. "It's because you never made it clear to Papa you did not want a puppy means that now we have one."

"I never said I didn't want one," Matthew protested. "I was initially worried that Lily was not up for it yet, but other than being rather excitable, which is no longer a unusual occurrence, she handled it very well."

"Well thank god for that," Violet said. "Though I do not suggest you ever let that girl try tea or coffee, she will run all of our ears off from dawn to dusk."

"Just wait until she gets to join us for dinner Granny," Mary laughed.

* * *

Lily opened her eyes and was not surprised to find Ivy in the corner of her room, mending the fire. She hadn't made a noise, Lily was sure of it, she just wanted to see her puppy.

Once the kitchen maid left the room Lily smiled and made her was stealthily out of the room. If Ivy was still mending the fires, she did not wake up the servants yet, and she knew for a fact that her room was one of the first she ever did, so Lily had a wide open stretch of quiet house to sneak through and get her puppy.

She was unaware exactly where her grandfather put the cage, but she knew it was in the servants hall, so she made her way there.

"Cleo," she whispered in the darkness and she suddenly heard a quiet yelp coming for her puppy. She stumbled on the cage completely by accident; it was next to the piano. Lily smiled and reached in to pet the puppy and realized suddenly that she did not know how to open the latch. The puppy barked again. "Shhh. Cleo we must be quiet." Her tiny fingers fumbled with the latch until she heard a click and the puppy barreled into her. "Yay!" Running wildly, Lily giggling, Cleo and her wrestled on the ground for a few seconds before she tried to gather her in her arms. "Let's go upstairs and wake up Mama and Papa!" The puppy was small enough that she could carry her, but she was also rather active and was not keen to be picked up by a three year old.

When she got to the top of the steps, she decided to climb the main stairs instead, because they were closer to her Mama and Papa's room. Unfortunately, her grip loosened on the puppy before she could get upstairs. "No, Cleo!" she hissed as the puppy took off running towards the library. "Uh oh!" Lily's eyes widened as she lost side of the puppy and heard something crash. Someone was bound to wake up to that so quickly she scurried up the stairs, abandoning the puppy and trying to save herself.

Lily crept into her parent's room and went to her Papa's side of the bed and poked his shoulder.

"Papa," she whispered. "Papa, wake up."

"Good morning my darling," Matthew smiled sleepily. "Isn't this a sight for sore eyes. Back to wanting to snuggle with your Mama and Papa in the mornings?" Lily bit her lip, she was going to tell him what happened, but this seemed so much more enjoyable. She nodded and scrambled on the bed, climbing over him and landing in the bed with a bump that woke Mary.

"Lily," Mary's face broke into a smile. They had sorely missed sharing the bed with the little girl in the mornings.

"Morning Mama," she giggled and kissed her Mama happily.

"Come here my darling," Mary breathed and gathered the three year old in her arms. The last time she had been in their bed was when she was hot with a fever, throwing up, none of them aware at all that she was as sick as she truly was. Lily sighed and closed her eyes contently, burying her face into her Mama's chest. Matthew reached out an arm and began to rub her back, much as they did that night. But this time they were trying to lull her back to sleep, not comfort her from an illness.

"I've missed this," Matthew admitted.

"She's so calm now," Mary said, amused. "I see no trace of that little terror she's been."

"Don't let her hear you say that," Matthew chuckled.

"She's asleep Matthew," Mary shook her head; cuddling with her daughter and wishing she could do the same. Matthew saw with a trained eye that his daughter was simply feigning, only because of the slight twitch of her mouth that tried to conceal a smile.

"Are you sure?" he said. Lily shifted slightly and Mary giggled.

"Oh yes Matthew, I'm sure," Mary smirked. "She could not even feel this if she tried." Before Lily knew what was happening Mary was tickling her wildly on the stomach.

"No!" the little girl squealed, wiggling out of her mother's arms but unable to escape the tickles. "Mama! No!"

"I'm sorry my darling but you tried to trick me," Mary laughed.

"Papa help," Lily attempted.

"Like this?" he asked and joined Mary in the tickling.

"Papa," Lily continued to giggle and writhe in the bed before she jumped up and folded her arms. "No!"

"No?" Matthew raised his eyebrow. "But I'm your Papa." Lily smiled and sat down on his chest, putting her face near his and grabbing his face with her hands.

"No," she shook her head and giggled, while squeezing his cheek and making his head shake as well. Matthew laughed, grasped her sides, and threw her in the air for a few moments before setting her back on the bed between them.

"You are a very silly girl," Mary poked her nose. "Would you like to continue to snuggle?"

"Yes please Mama," Lily now curled up against Matthew, Mary scooting closer to also take the little girl in her arms. Lily almost forgot the real reason she came up here until there was a large crash and a yell from downstairs.

"What on earth," Matthew sat up and Lily gasped.

"Matthew what was that?" Mary asked.

"I haven't the faintest idea," he looked at her seriously and his eyes widened as there was another crash. "Lily my girl did you see anything when you came in here?"

"Nuh uh," she shook her head quickly, looked down, avoiding her parents eyes. Mary sat up and looked seriously at her daughter.

"That was a lie Lily Isobel," she warned and picked her up, set her on her lap, and tilted her chin up to meet her eye. "Tell me the truth, do you know what that was." Lily nodded fearfully.

"Lily, you tell us this instant," Matthew commanded in a loud voice.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted Cleo," she blurted out crying. "She ran upstairs and-"

"She's a puppy, she cannot run up stairs, stop lying Lily," Mary's voice was hard and sharp; and Lily was not a fan of it. She saw the disappointment in her mother's eyes. "And I know for a fact she was put to bed last night, in her cage."

"I carried her upstairs," she whimpered.

"Even though you were expressly told not to!" Mary snapped.

"I'm sorry," she wailed pitifully and Mary couldn't help holding her to her chest for a few brief moments and comfort her before she was likely to hand out a punishment.

"Mama, Papa!" they heard William call. "Cleo is running wild downstairs and she's broken-" He was cut off by a loud crash.

"Uh oh," Lily cried.

"Uh oh, is right," Matthew narrowed his eyes at his daughter.

Yes, now that Lily was better, everything was getting back to normal.

Or perhaps back to chaos.

* * *

_So now there is a dog in the mix, always very amusing especially you can imagine with Lily as a child (: Poor Matthew and Mary, god knows what trouble she shall get into with a new companion!_

_Once finals are over and I am back home, updates might actually come three times a week so look forward to that!_

_Thank you all so much for the reviews, I always feel bad because I never reply directly to them but once I have more time on my hands (and I will have a lot more so far in the summer because I am only taking one summer class and no summer job yet) I will be sure to give you all due credit where it is deserved._

_Please continue to review and let me know what you think/what you want to happen!_


	12. Chapter 12

_Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey!_

_I want to clarify a few things before you read this chapter: The people I consider main characters are Lily (obviously), Mary, Matthew, Bertie, and William, and that is all..._

_Think about that (in context of what I said about main characters) and I hope you enjoy this chapter (:_

* * *

_7 __years old…_

Lily Crawley walked down the stairs of the house, having escaped her governess Emily for the day. She wasn't expected to be forced to answer in French or learn how to do other mindless things, today, was her seventh birthday. Today, her Mama and Papa said she could do whatever she wanted. Today, her Grandpapa and Grandmama were allowing her to eat at the dining room table. Today…

"Bertie! William!" she squealed as she made her way to the bottom of the steps and saw her brothers standing there. Before anyone could stop her she ran full speed towards them and jumped into William's, who was closest, arms. "What are you doing here?" she giggled as he spun her in a circle.

"It is your birthday, of course we are here," William, now thirteen, pressed a kissed to her cheek.

"What about me?" Bertie asked.

"Of course!" she indulged and threw her arms around him.

"Lily," she heard the voice of her governess practically shriek from her room upstairs. "Just because it is your birthday does not mean you forget all sense of manners I have EVER taught you." Lily rolled her eyes as Bertie kissed her cheek and chuckled at her.

"She obviously does not know our Lily," he nudged his brother. "C'mon, we did not get excused from boarding school to stand around here. Where are Mama and Papa?"

"I don't know, I've just come down," Lily informed them. "Did you hear, Grandmama and Grandpapa are allowing me to join you all for dinner tonight, not only luncheon?"

"You are seven now," William reminded her.

"And because you are seven you should heed your governesses advice, at least some of it anyway," a sharp voice interrupted them. Lily turned around and sheepishly grinned at Mary.

"Sorry Mama, but why didn't you tell me," she said.

"If we would have told you, it wouldn't have been a surprise," she walked over to her daughter and kissed her cheek. "Happy birthday my darling."

"Thank you Mama, where is Papa?" she asked.

"Settling something for your present," Mary's eyes sparkled excitedly.

"Really, what?" Lily gasped.

"You expect her to tell you Lil, really?" Bertie laughed. "Hello Mama, long time no see."

"My boys," Mary greeted and gathered them in her arms. "Behaving I hope?"

"Of course we are Mama," William chided. "And besides, not much has since you saw us over Christmas holiday."

"I'm sure," Mary rolled her eyes. "Have you two eaten breakfast yet?"

"Yes Mama, on the train, now can we know what Lily's present is?" Bertie said.

"No!" Lily hissed. "They will either ruin it or torture me!"

"Exactly little sister," William laughed at her and patted her head.

"Can we take a walk?" she asked.

"Later," Mary shook her head. "Boys why don't you go to your rooms and settle in. Lily and I will be in the sitting room, your Grandmama is waiting and your Grandpapa will be back soon."

"Where is Grandpapa?" she asked.

"Settling some things, from the Dower House," Mary said quietly and sighed as she saw her daughter's lips tremble slightly.

"I can hear her in my head sometimes Mama, scolding me for being too active while laughing and encouraging me all the same," Lily sighed. "Today is my first dinner in the dining room and she will not be there."

"Granny loved you very much, just remember that," Mary stroked her daughter's hair softly. "We all miss her dearly."

"Lily, happy birthday my dear," she heard Cora call from the sitting room as their voices echoed in.

"Hello Grandmama, thank you," Lily smiled.

"Can you ring for some tea Mary," Cora asked as Lily sat nicely opposite her grandmother. "Enjoying your first surprise I see."

"I've missed them so terribly much," Lily sighed. "They annoy me to pieces when they are here but it's so boring when they are not." Cora smiled at her as Lily raised her eyebrow in a very Mary type fashion. "First surprise, so there are more."

"You must wait my dear, until after luncheon," Mary reasoned. "Papa and Grandpapa will be back by then. There you will receive our presents but then you must wait for Aunt Edith, Uncle Anthony, Uncle Tom, and Aunt Rosamund."

"Well it is not their presents I am anticipating is it Mama," Lily giggled and straightened up excitedly.

"Where are the boys?" Cora asked as Alfred came in. "May we have some tea?"

"Certainly your ladyship," he nodded and left the room.

"They are settling in, they are only here for two days but have brought enough for a week," Mary explained. "I think they believe we will ask them to stay longer but I want them to get a proper education."

"As you should," Cora nodded. "There are tough times ahead of us and who knows what they will need to do. I am thankful for Matthew's money for keeping us going while the Depression has given a hard blow to us, speaking nothing of America. And Germany has me worried."

"Oh Mama," Mary sighed at her. "It is not like the Great War, it will not come to that."

"But all the same," Cora said and then turned to Lily who was watching them with wide eyes. "I'm sorry Lily dear; we mustn't bother you with this on such a day as today."

"But it is interesting," Lily piped up. "Go on."

"We shall do no such thing," Mary shook her head as Alfred returned with the tray of tea. Lily grasped hers gratefully.

"Thank you Alfred," she said sweetly and giggled as the footman winked at her.

"You are welcome Miss Lily, and happy birthday," he nodded, handed Mary and Cora their tea, and made his exit.

"Tomorrow you must go downstairs and thank Mrs. Patmore for your dinner Lily," Mary reminded her. "And your dessert."

"May I know what that is or is it a surprise too," Lily rolled her eyes and sipped her tea carefully.

"Careful Mama," William announced, walking into the room. "The older she gets the smarter her mouth is."

"It is chocolate cake Lily," Mary rolled her eyes right back at her daughter and Lily giggled excitedly.

"Hello Grandmama," William greeted Cora, kissing her cheek. Bertie followed suit in the room, doing the same.

"Is it time for luncheon yet?" Bertie asked.

"Oh hush, it is my birthday, you do not get everything you want on _my_ birthday," Lily wrinkled her nose at him.

"Oh Lily," Bertie sighed as if he was a lot older than eleven years. "When will you learn that I always get what I want?"

"Never if I have it my way," Mary narrowed her eyes at her sons. "Once Lily is finished her tea she may go on that walk with you two but if you are not back by luncheon…"

"If you say she won't get her presents then we will make sure she isn't," William ruffled Lily's hair.

"William," she protested. "Now it's a mess."

"Wow, little Lily has become quite a lady since we have been gone, hasn't she Master Crawley," Bertie nodded, teasingly, in a superior tone.

"Very much so," William said. "She'll have absolutely no need for our present anymore."

"Stop torturing your sister and get out of here," Mary shooed her sons. "Lily, you may go with them if you wish."

"Only because I do miss them even though I _hate_ them," she sighed and put her tea down. "And I will still get my presents, right?"

"Yes my darling, go with your brothers," Mary laughed.

"Cleo," she whistled and the dog suddenly bounded upstairs from being down in the servants hall and went to Lily's side faithfully. Mary smiled as she left and turned to her mother.

"You do know your father is upset with you for stealing his present," Cora reprimanded her daughter lightly.

"She was given Cleo by him," she reminded her.

"She is the family dog, or at least your family's dog," Cora protested.

"Oh Mama, did you see how that dog came only for her," Mary laughed. "She's Lily's dog wholly and completely. There's no doubt about that."

"I suppose so," Cora sighed.

* * *

"Mrs. Patmore has made all your favorites today Lily," Robert told her.

"Carson, can you please thank her for me," Lily piped up, looking up from her luncheon, to the butler and he nodded.

"Of course Miss Lily," he nodded at her. They enjoyed their luncheon talking mostly about William and Bertie's second semester, Lily ok with it because she could only talk about her boring days for so long. Besides, unless Miss Emily had another plan for her, she usually ate luncheon with the family anyway.

Luncheon was going terribly slow as Lily finished but noticed several members of her family were not.

"I feel as though a certain little girl is rather eager for her presents," Matthew narrowed his eyes at his daughter and she giggled into her napkin.

"I can wait," she said, though her body language said otherwise.

"Careful Lily, you don't want to be too disappointed if it is not everything you wished for," Mary shook her head. "We did just celebrate Christmas."

"I can wait Mama," she said pointedly, as if she wanted to prove she would not be immature about it, she was seven after all.

"You shouldn't have to," Robert said, getting up. "C'mon, let's go to the library." She giggled as her grandfather winked at her and jumped up out of her seat.

"Papa you indulge her too much," Mary shook her head.

"She is my youngest grandchild," Robert answered. "And I'm not getting any younger."

"Papa, why did Gran Iz not come over for luncheon?" Bertie asked.

"She invited Dr. Clarkson over for luncheon today," Matthew laughed.

"Gross," Lily muttered under her breath before she shuffled ahead of her grandfather.

"Alright, who first?" Mary said. "Mama?" Lily perked up, she was hoping for a new dress for a while and although she had gotten one Christmas, she had already worn it for the servant's ball and New Year's Eve. Lily felt bad for wanting a new one but she knew her family's financial situation was not as rough as some other aristocrats who have suffered from the Great Depression.

"It's not much," Cora apologized but Lily was excited anyway as she pulled out exactly what she wanted, and it was red too.

"It's beautiful Grandmama thank you," Lily got up and kissed her grandmother a thank you.

"Let her open ours next," Bertie said.

"I don't know what you are talking about ours, this explanation is all you," William rolled his eyes.

"You are both children sometimes, I swear it," Lily smirked and Mary and Matthew laughed at the expense of their sons.

"Here," Bertie huffed as he handed his sister their present. "It's a diary, we figured we'd give everyone left here at Downton a break from your chatter box mouth, maybe write some of those thoughts down instead of blurting them out for a change." Lily glared at her brother.

"You are a prat sometimes you know that?" she growled.

"Lily Isobel Crawley," Mary snapped. "That is enough out of you unless you want Miss Emily to be informed that those words came out of your mouth."

"Sorry Mama," Lily sighed and turned to her grandfather excitedly.

"My present has several, completely unrelated parts," Robert explained, pulling out several gifts. There were a few books that she informed him were lacking from the library that she wanted to read, there was a new collar and leash for Cleo, and finally a beautiful locket with the letter L on it. Lily bit her lip to conceal her disappointment at the lack of the gift she thought she would receive from him. The same one that Sybbie and Lizzie had received on their seventh birthdays from their grandfather, and the boys whenever they had expressed interest in it.

"Thank you Grandpapa," she was an excellent actress and she hid it well, because after all, she wasn't expecting the locket and it was beautiful. "I love it all, although I'm not sure Cleo will thank you." She rose to her feet and kissed him, and he hugged her tightly, showing a knowing grin to her parents that were behind her.

"Alright, our turn," Mary smiled at stood up, holding out her hand for her daughter. "Follow me."

"What Mama?" Lily turned back to her.

"It's your surprise," Mary answered.

"You must close your eyes, darling," Matthew smirked. "And you mustn't cheat," Mary added.

"We'll make sure she doesn't open them," Bertie laughed, desperate to get her back for the prat comment.

"Where are we going?" she asked, sighing as she closed her eyes and felt her mother tug her slightly urging her to walk forward while her father put a hand on her back to guide her.

"Patience is a virtue Lily," Matthew said.

"Papa you sound like Miss Emily," Lily would have rolled her eyes if they were not shut. "Honestly." She felt a cool breeze on her and her heart pounded in anticipation. "We are going outside."

"Yes," Mary said.

"But what for?" Lily insisted.

"I swear she does not understand the meaning of surprise," Bertie laughed and suddenly he saw his sister's brown eyes opening. "LILY!"

"What?" she hissed. "I had something in my eye I needed to blink."

"I'm sure my darling," Matthew said. "It is a shame we do not believe you."

"I'll keep them closed," she grumbled.

"But there isn't a reason to anymore, open your eyes," Mary said as Lily gasped as she did exactly that. They were at the stables and her heart leapt as in front of her loomed a beautiful black horse.

"Oh Mama, Papa," she gasped and immediately jumped into Mary's arms and kissed her cheek. "Thank you ever so much!" She turned to her father next.

"Happy birthday sweet girl," Matthew chuckled.

"And he's black," Lily gushed. "Just like your old horse Diamond Mama, oh thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"This is why this is usually my present," Robert grumbled as Lily approached the horse and began to examine it closely. "I've been outshined."

"I'm sorry Papa," Mary sighed. "But you gave her Cleo; she will be her companion for everything else just think of that."

"Oh but Grandpapa I love your necklace," she reassured him.

"Then I hope you like our riding outfit we also bought you," Cora said. Giving in she ran to her grandmother again and hugged her. To her grandpapa she hugged him tighter.

"I know you would have bought me it if they'd have allowed you to," she turned back to her horse, her eyes shining at her Mama and Papa.

"What's his name?" she asked.

"That's for you to decide," Matthew informed her. She looked at her still slightly despondent grandfather.

"Grandpapa, could you please name him for me?" she asked. "You named Cleo, it is only right for you to name my horse as well."

"Why does she always sound so sweet when she talks to him?" William rolled his eyes. "Although it is probably best, she'd name the poor beast Heathcliff if she could." Lily narrowed her eyes at her brother menacingly.

"Grandpapa please," she added going up to him and leading him to the horse.

"All right," he chuckled and patted the horse. "Good choice Mary, exactly the horse I'd have chosen."

"Of course Papa because it's practically the same horse you chose for me," Mary reminded him.

"What about Zeus, the Greek God, from that book you insist I buy you?" Robert suggested. "Look at that." He pointed to the top of the horses muzzle where a white patch was seen, at if you squinted it almost looked like a lightning bolt.

"Perfect," she stood on her toes and kissed him on the cheek. "I love it."

"Now when can you start riding him?" he asked.

"Not today," Mary warned. "And not tomorrow either because Miss Emily has plans for you tomorrow."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Wednesday then?" she asked.

"I have no objections," Mary said. "And I shall come with."

* * *

"Oh Lizzie he's beautiful," Lily gushed to her cousin as they sat in the drawing room waiting to go in to dinner. "I absolutely cannot wait to start riding."

"I'm sure," Lizzie told her younger cousin dismissively, as if she had heard enough about the horse.

"Don't be a spoil sport Lizzie," Sybbie reassured Lily. "I'm sure he is and I'm sure you'll be a brilliant rider, you shall take after me."

"You?" Mary said. "And where do you think you got that skill from?"

"My Mama of course," Sybil chided. Mary smiled sadly at her.

"Your Mama could ride, just never as well as I could," Mary informed her.

"And what about you Mama," Lizzie called from across the room. "Could you ride as well?"

"We don't like to talk about your Mama's experiences with horses," Mary whispered loudly enough for the whole room to hear.

"Oh Mary must you?" Edith rolled her eyes.

"I think I must," Mary said. "The first time your Mama got on a horse she slid off the other side and-"

"That's enough," Edith hissed.

"Lily darling that necklace is gorgeous," Isobel said referring to her locket.

"It was one of my presents from Grandpapa," she beamed at her grandfather.

"Are you excited to have dinner with us?" Isobel continued.

"Of course," she giggled and sat up straighter. "But I mustn't get used to it I suppose."

"You never know my dear," Mary sat down next to her and patted her knee gently.

"Dinner is ready your ladyship," Carson suddenly announced at the door and Lily's heart was bursting with excitement as everyone rose to their feet and she followed them into the dining room that was set beautifully for the occasion and Lily was happy she was seated right between her mother and Sybbie. It was almost overwhelming as everything began to unfold, no amount of preparation from Miss Emily could have prepared her for finally no longer feeling like the baby of the family, she felt like she belonged.

Carson began to pour wine into everyone but her glass and her Grandpapa looked around the table proudly.

"Let us raise our glasses to our Lily and drink to her health," Robert said.

"And many more birthday's to come," Matthew added, Lily blushed as she felt her Mama's hand grab hers proudly.

"To Lily," everyone said raising their glasses. Lily kindly sipped her water but looked around to everyone drinking wine.

"May I try some," she smiled hopefully and Mary looked sternly at her daughter.

"Absolutely _not_," she hissed. "You may be getting older, but not _that_ old."

* * *

_Yes so, Violet died offscreen. I unfortunately could no longer find places to fit her in as well as the fact that this is 1934 and I realized that there was no way she would still be alive, so it was a choice, but a very hard choice._

_Lily has gotten a horse, what new antics (besides those I write with Cleo that you shall see eventually) could she get into now (:_

_Please let me know what you think of this chapter, Constructive criticism, what you like, whatever you want as long as it is not too hard and unkind. Thank you all for reading! Good news, finals week is almost over (:_


	13. Chapter 13

_Life of a Lily Chapter 13_

_DO NOT OWN DOWNTON ABBEY!_

_So sorry for the wait but I recently discovered after finals and unfortunately during finals that I love the TV show Psych, so that has been my current obsession (see profile if you want to read my new psych fic haha!)_

* * *

"I shall wait for you up here," Miss Emily informed her. "Then we shall begin arithmetic today I think." Lily rolled her eyes as she turned to the door that led downstairs to the kitchen, she didn't want to do arithmetic today. She wanted to ride her horse, but apparently the day after your birthday was not a time to be wasted and Lily was to continue her studies immediately.

"I'd prefer to read my book thank you very much," she muttered under her breath as she entered the kitchen with a smile.

"Mrs. Patmore," she greeted. The older cook spun on her heels and looked up.

"Miss Lily, what a surprise," she gasped.

"I just wanted to thank you for my cake yesterday and wonderful dinner," she told her. "And Ivy and Daisy too, I know they helped, but I also know that _you_ know chocolate cake is my favorite."

"It was no trouble at all Miss Lily," she reassured.

"But all the same it made my first dinner very special," Lily smiled at her. "I'm sorry to take up your time, I shall be going." She seemingly mindlessly, instead of walking to the stairs, stumbled into the serving hall. Mrs. Hughes was sitting there as well as Anna and O'Brien. All three stood up.

"Miss Lily," Mrs. Hughes. "Is there anything I can help you with?"

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to come through this way and disturb you," Lily gasped and grumbled under her breath so no one could hear. She was hoping to meet someone else.

"Well up you go," Anna chided. "I very much doubt Lady Mary would like to hear from your governess when you take so long."

"Oh but I wouldn't mind," Lily sighed. "Sorry again." She exited the room and almost resigned herself to going back upstairs to endure the day when she suddenly almost crashed into Alfred.

"Miss Lily I'm so sorry," he excused.

"No Alfred, it's just perfect," Lily smiled to herself. Despite how many years he has worked at Downton, he was still the most gullible. "I was wondering if you could do me a favor. There is a book I received as a birthday present and it is in the library, I do not wish to disturb the maids who are cleaning it while my grandfather is out. Could you get it for me? I'll wait down here?"

"Of course Miss Lily," he nodded to her.

"Oh and Alfred," she grinned. "If Miss Emily asks, I'm waiting for Daisy to thank her and I won't be long." Out of sight she sat down in a chair in the hallway, waiting for two minutes until he returned.

"Here you go Miss Lily, and Miss Emily has inquired that she wants you upstairs right now," Alfred told her sheepishly.

"Shame I am doing nothing of the sort," Lily giggled and made a run for the back door the servants must use. "Thank you Alfred!"

"But Miss Lily," he called but she was already out the door, and Alfred was thankful that he didn't have to return upstairs at the moment.

Lily relished in the nicer day that it was outside, no clouds or rain in sight and took off across the lawn, hoping no one would look outside until she was tucked safely in her tree.

On Sunday's this was her usual perch when she read books if she wanted to be out of sight and out of mind. But because she was dining with them for her birthday, Miss Emily had gone over logistics with her for hours once she returned from church and it was torturous. Lily was desperate for a break, even though she had one yesterday, it was not the same.

"Thank god," she breathed as she settled in, grasping the book safely in her hands, and began to read. She loved acting like a lady, for she knew one day, when her father would inherit the title, she would be one. Lily loved dresses, and horses, and not going to school like the village children did though her father and mother had offered. However, sometimes she just wished her father would go back to the firm instead of run Downton Abbey as a co-owner. Then she could have an excuse for what she was doing now, running, and climbing, and escaping her governess. She would only be the daughter of an upper-middle class solicitor until he inherited the title.

She knew it was only moments before there would be a small search for her, she just prayed that she wouldn't tell her Mama.

"Lily! Lily Crawley where are you?" Miss Emily called out into the yard. If she was just going to call, there was no way Lily was coming so she continued to read, trying to suppress a giggle.

"Lily Crawley this instant!" Emily snapped and that's when Lily heard a bark and she looked up. Cleo was being let out by Alfred and the first thing she did was pick up her beloved owners scent.

"Oh no Cleo," she hissed as the dog bounded towards the tree having no idea what sort of trouble she would get her into. "Cleo shoo, please get out of here you silly dog!" Not being able to reach her Cleo began to bark up the tree and Lily shut her eyes and waited for it.

"LILY ISOBEL CRAWLEY YOU ARE UP THAT TREE AREN'T YOU!" Miss Emily shrieked.

"Now look what you've done," Lily hissed to the dog.

"DO NOT MAKE ME COME OUT THERE!" she threatened and Lily sighed and hopped down, coming into view. She grimaced as she felt the top of her stockings tear and hoped that the run would not make it down her leg as she walked, very slowly to let Miss Emily blow off steam. Cleo faithfully went to her side as if she had done nothing wrong so Lily couldn't help but scratch the dog behind the ear.

"Hello Miss Emily," Lily said calmly.

"And where did you think you were going?" Miss Emily asked.

"I wasn't going anywhere," Lily informed her. "I was sitting in a tree."

"Oh my god," Miss Emily exclaimed, lifting up her young charges shirt to look at the run in her stockings. "Look at what you have done?"

"If you wouldn't have called me I would not have had to jump down the tree and tear them," Lily hissed.

"Is that anyway a lady should behave?" she questioned.

"I'm not a lady yet, am I?" Lily retorted as she stepped into the house.

"What have I done to you that you must speak to me in this way?" the governess snapped. "I have half a mind to tell your mother about this incident and your behavior. And to think I was giving you the afternoon off once we were finished with today's studies." Lily groaned, how could she be so stupid to ruin this.

"Oh but Miss Emily, surely I didn't waste too much time, I could still-"

"If you think I am giving you the afternoon off now you are sorely mistaken," the governess narrowed her eyes. "You shall be practicing the piano for the whole afternoon until I am satisfied."

"Oh must I," Lily sighed. "I'd much rather read or write or-"

"Well it isn't all about you is it?" Emily snapped.

"What is going on out here?" Mary emerged from the drawing room and Lily winced, she had been hoping she was calling on Gran Isobel like she said she was. Really, Lily had hoped to come with her, she loved Crawley house, but it was most likely no longer an option.

"Perhaps Lily should explain?" Emily narrowed her eyes at the young girl and when Lily set her jaw and glared at the governess she took over. It was now her mother's turn to glare at her. "No? Miss Lily decided that it was best to climb trees in the garden rather than continue her studies. And then when I caught her decided that she was a governess and thought she could, very unkindly I might add, suggest what she would be doing since she is no longer allowed to call on Mrs. Crawley's with you."

"Lily," Mary prompted.

"I'll be waiting in my room Lily," Emily sounded so superior Lily clenched her fists indignantly.

"Sorry," Lily muttered turning unrelentingly to Mary.

"Oh, you will continue to be sorry," Mary continued, her voice harsh. "Not only will you have to do everything Miss Emily says today, and that means no calling on Gran Isobel with me, but I must turn down an invitation given to you to join us for dinner once again."

"Mama-"

"I am not done Lily," Mary said. "Your grandparents kindly extended the invitation one because it is your brothers' last day here and two because of how gracious and lady like you behaved yesterday, I see no evidence of that behavior today."

"But Mama," Lily hissed.

"And I have half a mind to cancel your riding lesson tomorrow." Mary observed how absolutely miserable she looked at these words so she gave in, but only slightly. "However, in times such as these we cannot go about wasting money on a horse, no matter how undeserving you are of it at the moment," Mary sighed. "But I cannot promise you Miss Emily will let you off for anything else other than the riding lesson. So you will probably be so exhausted you will have no time to climb trees or read or any other leisure activity."

"Mama it is not-"

"Do not even begin to say it is not fair, because it most certainly is," Mary said. "You are seven, getting older, and you must learn to act that way. Throwing tantrums such as these is no way to prove that." Lily glared at her mother.

"Do not even begin to tell me that you never ran away from your governess Mama," Lily raised her chin indignantly to her mother. "Because that would be a lie."

Mary smiled widely, walked up to her daughter, and kissed her on the forehead. Lily immediately pushed her away.

"Yes my darling, I did, but there is a difference."

"And what would that be?" Lily growled.

"I was so much better at it."

"Well good for you," she exclaimed and stalked away.

* * *

"Well doesn't that sound beautiful," Matthew said walking into the room where his daughter was sitting at the piano. For such a beautiful sound, his daughter's expression was that of misery.

"Thank you Papa," she muttered and continued.

"That is enough for today Lily, perhaps tomorrow we shall do more," Miss Emily smiled and Lily grumbled. Matthew was confused; Lily loved to play the piano.

"Lily darling what is that matter?" Matthew asked as she pushed out of the room and past him. "Are you excited, having been asked to dinner yet again tonight?" Her shoulders went rigid.

"Ask Mama," she hissed and marched upstairs. Matthew narrowed his eyes as he saw a run from her stocking reaching from her ankle to where it disappeared underneath her skirt.

"Miss Emily are you aware of where I could find Lady Mary?" he asked the governess.

"I believe she is in the sitting room with Lady Grantham," she answered. Matthew headed there warily.

"Are you sure she cannot join us for dinner?" Cora was asking her daughter. "It was so wonderful having her there last night and it is the boys' last day home."

"She is being punished Mama, and eating dinner with us is a reward," Mary said stiffly.

"Why is Lily being punished?" he asked and Mary jumped up in surprise.

"Matthew," she breathed. "You gave me a fright."

"Why is Lily being punished?" Matthew repeated.

"Our daughter seems to have gained a lot of cheek with her seventh birthday," Mary explained. "Gave it to both I and Miss Emily today." Matthew groaned.

"Mary I dealt with a lot more cheek than you ever have," Cora cupped her daughter's cheek lovingly. "And your poor governess was almost frightened of you when you were angry."

"Precisely why I am being hard on her now," Mary answered. "So she will not turn out as I did."

"I don't know, I particularly like how you turned out," Matthew smiled.

"And would you like our daughter to make the same mistakes as I Matthew?" she asked and watched as his jaw suddenly set. "She's giving us cheek and she is not even a teenager yet. There are no boys-"

"Mary," he growled. "Do not mention Lily as a teenager and a boy in the same sentence."

"I forgot who I was talking to," Mary chuckled. "The protective father with the shot gun."

"Well I haven't bought it yet," Matthew quipped. "Perhaps I should."

"I feel as though I shouldn't be a witness to this conversation, if I ever have to testify on your behalf Matthew," Cora laughed and excused herself from the room. Matthew sat next to Mary.

"Why must she grow up so fast," Mary sighed. "Couldn't she just be my little girl forever? My calm, perfect-"

"I'm not sure what daughter you are talking about Mary," Matthew chuckled. "Our Lily has never been calm."

"But still," Mary sighed. Matthew leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"I'll go up and revive her," Matthew smiled. "She hasn't given cheek to me yet."

"Oh just you wait Matthew." Matthew walked up the stairs and found his daughter in her room, sitting on the window sill, her head in a book.

"I was not given a proper greeting today," Matthew said hopefully. "I expect a hug and a kiss from my darling daughter every time I see her." Lily rolled her eyes and put down her book.

"I'm not in the mood today Papa," she sighed but obliged to do so anyway.

"What is all the fuss about today?" he asked her seriously. "Your mother and you are at odds and that never happens."

"I just wanted to read my book today Papa, not study arithmetic or play the piano," Lily murmured as he took her hands. "Or better yet ride my horse."

"Well, I'm sorry my dear but sometimes you must do things that you are not fond of, I'm sorry but it's true, and you just have to live with it or face the consequences," Matthew said.

"Papa can't you convince Mama-"

"We've already informed Mrs. Patmore not to include you in the count for dinner, it would not be fair to change it yet again," Matthew shook his head. "Now perhaps instead of me convincing Mama, you should go to her and apologize for your behavior today."

"Oh Papa must I," she sighed.

"Yes, it was not a suggestion," Matthew said, turning to the door. "Your Mama is stubborn and if you don't apologize straight away, she will not forgive very quickly."

"I'm stubborn too Papa," she informed him.

"Don't I know it, which is why I am insisting and not giving you an option to do otherwise," Matthew smiled at his daughter who scowled.

"All right," Lily consented. "But I'm not happy about it."

"I didn't expect you to be," Matthew chuckled. "Go on." He followed her downstairs and, although very improper, eavesdropped at the door.

"Mama," she said timidly.

"Hello Lily," he heard the formality in his wife's voice but knew it was all an act.

"I'm sorry for speaking to you in the way I did today, and disobeying Miss Emily," Lily apologized. "I am getting older and I must-" She broke off with a muffled grunt and Matthew peeked in to see Mary smothering her daughter to her chest. A genuine giggle escaped Lily's lips. "Mama!"

"Oh my darling, you are forgiven," Mary said.

"I truly am sorry," Mary saw that it wasn't just Matthew putting her up to it, as if she had been regretting her actions since she did them.

"Please, promise me, do not try and grow up too fast. You are my Lily girl and always will be."

"As long as not growing up does not include not riding my horse, I shall try Mama," Lily smiled.

"As long as I don't get much cheek I'd be happy with that," Mary arched an eyebrow at her. "Matthew do not eavesdrop," he heard Mary call. "I can hear you chuckling under your breath."

"My girls," he laughed. "What am I to do with you?"

"Papa," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Now, I think there is one more person you must apologize to," Mary stepped back and looked sternly at her daughter.

"Oh fine," she muttered and exited the room.

"Well that went a lot better than I expected," Mary laughed.

"What can I say, I'm smarter than you think," Matthew smirked.

"Much smarter," Mary whispered, pulled her husband closer, and kissed him on the lips.

"Oh and Mama," Lily began. "Oh Mama, Papa, don't you have a room to do that in?" She looked at her parents in disgust.

"Go apologize," Mary commanded.

"Never mind," Lily grumbled and shuffled out of the room as quick as possible.

"That's our Lily," Matthew smiled against Mary's lips and kissed her again, harder.

* * *

"Well don't you look smart," Mary beamed as Lily came down the stairs dressed in her riding outfit. Her eyes shined excitedly as her mother had something similar on.

"You really are coming Mama," despite their tension yesterday, Lily was happy to have this to share with her Mama.

"So you both really are going riding instead of seeing us off," William shook his head. "Disappointing."

"You have Papa," Lily walked up to him and kissed his cheek goodbye. "It's a girl's only day for Mama and I, right?"

"Well and Lynch," Mary chuckled.

"Regardless, we can say goodbye here," she kissed Bertie's cheek.

"Be good little sister," the younger of the two boys taunted. "Don't annoy Mama and Papa too much."

"No, I must save it all for you until you come home at the end of semester," Lily smirked. William laughed at his brother's expense. "You too, I didn't forget about you either William."

"Alright, you two will miss your train if we don't get a move on," Matthew told them.

"Oh fine Papa," William hugged Mary. "Goodbye Mama, don't be too hard on the poor girl." If Lily wasn't afraid of Miss Emily finding out, she would have kicked him.

"That's enough out of you all, go on," Mary kissed him back and kissed Bertie's cheek. "I love you both, behave, and-"

"Watch out for my little brother?" William hooked his arm around Bertie. Bertie frowned and wiggled away from him.

"Don't worry Mama, I will watch out for William," he said. Mary shook her head they continued to argue out of the front door.

"I feel bad for the women they marry," Lily groaned.

"Oh hush up," Mary chided. "Now let's go my darling, we mustn't keep Lynch waiting." When the got to the stables Lily was in awe of how beautiful Zeus looked in both the bright sunlight and saddled and ready for her to ride.

Getting on the horse, to ride side saddle, was a lot harder than her Mama made it look. The first time she got up, she could have sworn she almost became Aunt Edith and slipped off the other side, but Lynch had been there to steady her. And that's when it clicked, she felt as if she belonged on this horse, as if there was nothing more wonderful than riding.

She watched as her Mama rode skillfully on her house, having learned over thirty years ago how to ride. Mary could practically see the envy in her eye as Lynch walked the horse gently around the stable, so Lily could get a feel of how it felt.

Mary could see how her muscles flexed and she was urging to try it on her own, but to placate her own fears of her daughter getting hurt, she waited at least two rotations before intervening.

"Lynch, you remember how quickly I learned," she told the older man. "I know you must see in my daughter the same intuition for horses as I have, because I can see it."

"Really Mama," Lily gasped. Mary smiled at her.

"Really darling," she reassured. "I give you permission to let her try on her own."

"All right then," Lynch said. "Remember everything I said and off you go."

Mary watched in amazement as Lily walked the horse slowly around the stable on her own. By the fourth time, her daughter grinning widely, Mary joined her and allowed the pace to speed up a bit.

"Mama," Lily giggled. "I'm doing it, I really am doing it."

"You are my darling," Mary felt a lump rise in her throat. Her daughter's voice showed nothing of the resentful tone she exhibited yesterday, or the formal tone she strove to maintain throughout dinner on her birthday, she was doing exactly what Mary wanted her to do. Remain a child, remain her baby girl. Because her baby girl's voice sounded as it had the day Mary and Matthew caught her escaping her crib, or when she first rode her tricycle, or when she ran off the ride at the fair in Thirsk proclaiming that she was not scared at all.

"Mama, what's wrong?" she asked as Mary trotted away.

"Nothing darling, keep going," Mary said and hopped off her horse and turned into the stable itself.

"Lynch, could you please help me get down, that I have not quite mastered yet," Lily asked and the man obliged. He knew better than to not follow her as she hurried after Mary.

"Mama," she called again and she found her Mama in tears. "Do not cry Mama."

"Oh my darling," Mary sighed. "My darling Lily. I never cried this much before I was a mother, and now every time one of you does something that makes you seem so grown up, I become a weeping willow."

"That's not a bad thing Mama," Lily reassured.

"Oh I know it's not, it's just," Mary reached out to cup Lily's cheek. "I don't know if you remember Lily, when you were three and you had-"

"Scarlet fever," she finished. "I don't remember it, I suspect not many would. But I know I had it."

"We almost lost you," Mary whispered harshly. "And seeing you on that horse today, it's something at one point that week I thought I never would see. You looked so strong, so confident, and so elegant. My chest might explode in pride."

"Well you didn't lose me Mama," Lily smiled up at her. "I'm right here, and I am not going anywhere." She grabbed her Mama's hand and pulled her back towards the horses. "Now come on Mama, help me, teach me to be as good as you are."

"Aren't you tired at all?" Mary chuckled, wiping her eyes with a handkerchief.

"When am I ever tired Mama," Lily giggled.

"That's my girl," she smiled through her residual tears.

"That's you Mama," Lily beamed, and Mary felt as if she would burst in happiness.

* * *

_Please review and let me know what you think!_


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